Orb of Obscurity

13- Metanoia

*the journey of changing one's mind or heart*

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He leaned forward to kiss me. It conveyed more feelings than words could ever do. It felt right. It didn't stop. He pulled away when we ran out of breath.

"Keep calling me Chim. Feels better than my name." He removed my glasses and put them aside.

The kiss progressed and it strayed away from being innocent. He shifted on his side, hovering over me, hands slowly travelling upwards from my waist. I put my hands on his shoulder pushing him away softly.

Words failed me. I shook my head at him, looking down.

He put his fingers on my chin and lifted it up, forcing me to look at him.

"I would never do anything without your consent. Stop me if you feel any discomfort even if it's something small. Do you understand?" He asked me, never breaking eye contact.

I nodded. "Words dear. I love hearing your voice."

"Okay." I said, blushing furiously.

"I want you to set yourself free when you're with me, just how I am with you. I know you are a shy person and that all this is new for you. But I want you to relax. Sometimes losing control has its own kind of power." He pecked my lips and ran his thumb under my eyes.

Was I crying? Yes, I was. Those were words I'd never heard but I had always wanted to. He was taking me over and I wasn't ready. He was asking me to give in.

"Love is putting roots in someone's heart Saura. Don't fear it, don't ever push me away from you. I won't ever judge you for your actions. I will be there for you, no matter what happens. Do you trust me?"

I was sobbing full on by now. Jimin sat up and pulled me into his arms rocking me back and forth in his arms.

"I've wanted to say those words to you ever since your friend told me that you had never been in a relationship before. That explained why you always held back. Alright.... it's okay now. It's okay. Relax." He was literally cooing to me.

I gave a laugh despite the fact I was crying my eyes out.

"Maren. She is always trouble." He chuckled too. "I am fine. I just got overwhelmed." I wiped away my tears and sniffled.

"Let's be happy and make each happy. Hmm?" He asked me smiling.

"Okay." I nodded. He hugged me, kissing the crown of my head.

"You smell good." He sniffed.

"Stop sniffing!" I pushed him away.

"Alright, alright. Come here." He pulled me into him.

"By the way, you smell good too. I like the scent of your cologne."

"Noted." He chuckled.

I was beginning to fall asleep. My eyes drooped and my head rested on his chest.

Hospital.

I jerked myself awake. I had to go back. I had a night shift.

"Jimin I am falling asleep. I have to go back. I have a night shift." I sighed.

"Now? You are already tired. Can't you take today off?" He looked at me sadly.

"No. Sadly no. If I did so now, I won't get holidays when I am seriously sick. Better to work now, so that I can take days off when I am sick." I said.

"That makes sense even if it shouldn't. You are being over worked." He rested his chin on my head.

"All students are." I chuckled. "Just one more year, just one more and I will be free."