Guarded Hearts

Goodbye

Fatima's POV

"Don't forget to sweep under the table. I'm tired of coming in here and the floor is still dusty. I don't understand how you can be so lazy with the way you sleep all day"

It took everything in me not to roll my eyes to Jones's annual banter as I'm cleaning the lunchroom. It seems like out of all the prisoners here she targets me the most, like a damn bitch, is your life so miserable that you got to fuck with me.

I haven't been in the best mood lately. It's been 3 months since I met with Mr. Meyers about my case and I'm starting to believe that I'm actually going to be stuck here until I'm 40. I knew it was too good to be true, but a part of me was hoping that dreams do come true.

I have not been feeling well at all and unfortunately, the infirmary does not take in patients unless you are near death. Aubrey was able to steal me and a pregnancy test from the commissary and it came back negative so that was one bullet I was able to dodge. So I've been taking every over-the-counter pill I could get my hands off and just sleep it off

Lastly, I haven't seen him in three months. 

At first, I thought that he probably to some days off until I heard one of the prisoners told me that he was put in office duty in the west wing of the building, where the eastside was not allowed to go to unattended. 

However, I would still go into the janitor's closet waiting for him, but he would never show up. After the second month, it became evident to me that he was avoiding me, but I couldn't understand why. I don't remember doing anything going wrong, whenever we spent time together it was perfect despite the circumstance.

It was filled with "I Love You's", Deep conversation, jokes, and passionate love-making that left us breathless. 

So what went wrong?

After finishing up my cleaning task of sweeping and mopping the lunchroom, I rolled the mop bucket and broom to the janitor's closet.

What I wasn't expecting was to see HIM in there.

We literally had a stare-off.

Him with an apologetic look on his face and I with a look that wanted him to drop dead in that moment.

I finally pushed the mop bucket in the closet and closed the door behind.

Ignoring that the man three months ago I wanted nothing more to feel his lips on me, I hung the broom upon the supply hanger, pour the water down the sink in the corner of the closet, and rinsed off the mop. His eyes stayed me waiting for me to say something, not use to this cold demeanor that he was never in the receiving end of.

"I know you hate me right now, but I can explain"

I simply ignored me and continued rinsing the mop, as angry as I was I still wanted to hear his explanation.

"I should have been a man instead of avoiding you, but-"

"So you WERE avoiding me?" I whipped my head around and stared at him like he was the dirt under my shoes.

He looked like a deer caught in a headlight, probably wishing that it came out better

He finally sighed and leaned against the wall looking at the floor

"Fatima...I love you"

I continued staring at him with my eyes now crossed and my heart beating a mile a minute. Deep down I had a feeling that he was going to say something that I knew would break me.

"I'm leaving next week, I decided that I'm going to work with my father at his church"

I stayed silent and continued staring at him, there was more to this, even though him leaving was already hurtful, there were so many ways around that for us to communicate, so what does that have to do with him avoiding me.

"Angela-"

"Angela?!!! so is that why you been avoiding me, now all of a sudden you want to be the "faithful husband" after YOU told me it was a business arrangement and that you didn't love her. Did your preacher daddy finally shook you up and know walk in his shoes of button-down suits and fake bible verses, and bribing people out their money and-"

"ANGELA'S PREGNANT!!!!!"

If looks could kill, this nigga would have been laid out. As much as I wanted to scream and cry and throw things at him, all I could do was stand there.

"How could she be pregnant...if you told me ya stopped having sex when we got together" I was finally able to muster up

"It just happened....what would I have looked like telling my WIFE that she couldn't sleep with me? I slipped up... I should have worn protection...but I slipped up"

I couldn't look at him, so I turned from him, hoping that the tears that threatened to come out would go away, but that failed as a couple of teardrops fell from my eyes.

"You have every right to hate me, but I don't want my child to break up in a broken home. I don't want to be like my father having affairs, I want to be a good husband and a good father"

"I hate you" the words slowly came out as I slowly turned around

Although I didn't mean it, I needed to say something that would hurt him the way he was hurting me right now, and from the look on his face, it was working.

"You made me love you, you made me fall so deep in love with you, and put all this bullshit and fantasies in my head thinking that what we had was real. I let you play me-"

"I didn't play you-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!"

"YOU MADE ME FALL IN LOVE YOU AND I LET YOU BECAUSE FOR THE FIRST TIME SOMEONE MADE ME FEEL HUMAN. FOR THE FIRST TIME TIME I FELY ALIVE IN MY WHOLE LIFE BUT I SHOULD'VE KNOWN BETTER. I SHOULD'VE KNOWN THAT LIKE EVERY MAN THAT I EVER CAME ACROSS YOU WASN'T SHIT"

"I ain't shit?" he said obviously pissed with everything I was stating

"YOU AIN'T SHIT!!! I'm not even mad at you though, I'm mad at myself, I should've known better" I say sobbing

"I never wanted to hurt you Fatima, I swear-"

"But you did...you did... I pray that you never feel the kind of pain I'm feeling right now" I say shaking my head and backing away from him, I could've sworn I saw tears in the bridge of his eyelid, but fuck him

"Look I fucked up, but I don't want us to end like this," He said coming towards me

I shook my head with tears violently coming down my face

"No, stay away from me. Good luck with life, Good Luck with the Baby, and Good luck with your marriage. I hope you nothing but the best"

"Fatima-"

"Goodbye Adrian"

I say opening the door and slamming it shut behind me, obviously, he couldn't run after me due to us being in a prison and it blowing our cover.

I walked down the hallway with tears streaming down my eyes.

It seemed like my life was meant for heartache since the day I was born. 

I don't have a family, I'm going to be in prison for 20 more years, and the only man that I ever loved dropped me in a heartbeat.

I'm tired of this life...I'm tired.

Hey Guys, I hope you're staying safe!!!!!

Do You think Adrian Made The right decision?

Apparently, Fatima isn't pregnant...or is she?

There are 2 more chapters, do you think I should make a sequel or leave it as a cliffhanger?