Our Incomplete Story

Hatred, Memories.... love?

Nina

He looks miserable in pain right now. Looking at his scans, it looks like hes fallen off from somewhere high. Im actually scared right now.  My heartbeat is only increasing but why? its been 7 years since I've seen him. I've lost control again but this time I'm not going to fall for him again. He has only lied to me and hurt me in the past. Its not going to happen again.

" Dr. Nina, the surgery must done now", said one of the nurses.

"Yes, I'm going to be the one to do it", I said while quickly preparing. That's when he grabbed my hand. He wasn't just any nurse but also one of my really close friends from New York. He knew exactly what this was about. He took my arms and turned me around towards him. I knew exactly what he was going to say. It was our clinic's policies that we as doctors cant perform on any of the patients that we were emotionally close to.

" Nina, I'm talking to you as a friend here, Are you sure you can do this?", he asked me while lightly patting my hand in comfort.

"Yes, its purely my profession and nothing else", I said while turning away. knowing that I just lied right through his face.

Rico and I did medical school together but after the 3rd year he switched his choices and became a nurse. We were friends since high school. He also knew everything about Vincent. He was always there for me, through my happiness which rarely showed up at my front door but also through sadness which was like an unwelcomed neighbor, always showing up without fail but mainly he was there when my father passed away. I could never forget that cursed night. that same night I also saw Vincent for the first time or more like the first time we laid our eyes on each other.

After about 4 hours later ...

I was sitting in my office when Rico came in. I knew exactly what he was going to talk about. My past. He brought us coffee. Its these little things he does that makes me respect his friendship even more. 

" You lied to me Nina", he claimed.

"Rico why would you say that? ", I was pretty confused or maybe just trying to avoid the whole situation. sometimes its easier to pretend that the problem doesn't exist than to accept the harsh truth.

" when you said it was strictly professional, Nina that was a lie. I've literally known you forever. I can tell when you lie. If it was strictly professional then why did you freak out when his name was pronounced, why were you gasping for air when you saw his face on the stretcher, why did you get so mad... you still haven't forgotten him have you?",  he knew exactly what he was doing. and maybe that was the reality, i may not have forgotten him but I was definitely not going to fall for his lies again.

before I could say anything a nurse came in, " Mr. Vincent... " ,  and just stood there looking at me and Vincent and the fact that she dint say anything after that was freaking me out.

"Vincent what nurse?!", I looked at her with a bit of fear in my heart. My heartbeat racing like crazy.

" He just woke up and hes calling for your name ", the nurse said . I stood up and as I was about to rush out, I see Rico and ask him to join me. I dont think I want to face him alone. I dont have the strength to face him again...

Rico open the door for me. As I walk in, I see him sitting up. impatiently waiting for me to enter. everything comes rushing back in. All the beautiful times we spent on our favorite bench, the times we spent in the hospital and then a shock flows through my body when those hurtful memories of betrayal and accusations comes through.

" Nurse, did you do a check up on this patient, is he alright", I say without even mentioning his presence. acting like he was just some ordinary patient to me. 

He has a confused expression across his face. he interrupts the nurse while shes talking to me.

"Nina, I want to talk to you alone", he asked politely.

"Mr. Vincent, its better if we discuss your health right now and its doctor Nina for you", I just knew I didn't want to be in a room alone with him at all. 

" To hell with my health, Nina I want to talk to you right now!", He yells quite loudly. And thats when I lost it.

" This isn't your mothers hospital, where you can do whatever you'd like. Those days are over when she use to rule the hospital and things went her way. This is my clinic. Things work my way here. I will only talk you if I want to!" I said in a very serious tone. Showing no sympathy or mercy. just like how he did when I needed him the most.

I leave the room, leaving him alone. this wasn't the first time that I had to walk out of his life with tears in my eyes.

I rush to my cabin and wipe my tears off. pulling out my journal and quickly jotting down my feelings. I wasn't really the "talk about feelings"person. I preferred writing  my feelings down. I started writing when I started high school and I still have every single one other than my last year at medical school which was also the last year i saw Vincent. i most likely left it at my dorm since I left in a rush. all my journals were always black leather. each year on my birthday I went to this bookstore where I got it from. the owner of the book store was a 70 year old man who was really good friends with my family. i still remember the last day i went to the book store, he gave me a bunch of those empty journals wrapped in gift paper as my "going away gift" with lots of wishes and hugs. I was still living that day in my thoughts when they get interrupted my a phone call. it was from "home".

" Good morning babyyyyyy ", I said while wiping my tears. he always brightens up my day.

" Good morning, when are you coming back home and why did you leave without saying anything... I miss you.", he said in a slow, sad tone.

"I'm coming soon, i had to leave for an emergency, sorry baby...how about our favorite ice cream for an apology?", I asked in an apologetic tone.

"yesssss will do... love you", he said in his soothing voice.

"love you too baby", I said . he always makes my day.

They are the only reason I go home. they give me a reason to smile , a reason to love. if it wasn't for them, then I would've just stayed at the hospital all the time and been a giant mess all this time. they give me the courage to function everyday. if it wasn't for them god what would i have been doing right now?

okay guys soooooo please leave comments for ideas and thoughts. I was super nervous but hopefully I'm not too bad hahaha please let me know how it is. it took me a great deal of courage to start writing thanks to one of my really stubborn friend who keeps trying to get me to embrace my artistic side soooo love you A.