those boys - Alejandro Rosario & Mattia Polibio

ignore us

"Mae I fucking care about you okay. He always joked about the list and I never even knew you two were you know."

"We weren't fucking Robert." I said annoyed at his assumption.

"Wait really?"

"Pathetic, did he tell you that?"

"Nooo I just thought because I don't know, he's kind of someone to yea..."

"Well obviously I'm not like that kind of someone to yea. Robert seriously don't worry, I forgive you we're friends."

"Okay okay whatever but are you gonna ignore us forever? I thought you and kai talked it out?"

"We did."

"Then? Why aren't you hanging out with us and you're with Rowan?"

"Rowan is my friend, and I don't want to talk to ale or mattia-" I say before I feel someone grab my hand and pull me back outside of school. Mattia of course.

"Seriously? I can't have one fucking decent conversation without being interrupted this morning?" I say frustrated.

"You ignored all my calls and texts."

"Well yea I didn't wanna talk to you because I was to busy making a list."

"Mae."

"No you know what, I don't care what you have to say."

"Can we just talk? No arguing? Give me 5 minutes please."

"Hurry up."

"Look I'm truly sorry... I did that list as a joke because everyone said I was a player but it's just something about you is different. You don't fall at my feet like other girls do. You make me work for shit you make me soft for gosh sakes. I swear I never intended to play you or use you or anything. I truly like you." Mattia says as his eye bags lay there. It looks like he hasn't slept in days. I mean he probably didn't but I don't care.

"Mattia... god knows how much I cared for you. I lay awake thinking about everything that could have gone different. Me and you could of probably actually been something. Or me and ale I don't really know. I truly like or liked you too... but this is to much. I don't think a relationship is a good idea. And it's not even about the list that makes me angry about you. It's the fact all the times I thought were intimate between us was nothing special. The day I confessed my feelings? You made out with jenna. The week I went to Toronto and was crazy about you, you hooked up with Alexa. It's to much and I-" I say stopping for a little taking a breathe in. "And I don't think we can be any much more. You'll always be my friend but being a girlfriend isn't right." I say as tears drop from his eyes.

"I understand... I'm sorry... I'm a mess and you deserve someone much more...."

"If I'm being honest we're both a mess. Sorry for everything really. I just want to be friends."

"That's fine... sorry for everything I said. It was out of anger and I- I didn't mean any of it."

"It's okay... I'll see you later." I say walking pass him and back into school. Ale looks at me but I quickly look away and walk straight past them. That's enough talking about this whole situation. I've had enough of it.

Class goes by as a dread, me and Robert don't talk in class, I skipped lunch and went straight to class. But I couldn't avoid Kairi forever. Last period we go and sit in our normal seats. I try to just not talk to Kairi but of course it's impossible for him.

"Are you gonna ignore me forever?" He says grabbing out my right side of my airpods.

"I'm tired." I say grabbing my airpod back.

"Hang out with us today."

"No thanks."

"Really? Didn't you talk to mattia and Alejandro already?"

"Mattia ehh Alejandro no. I don't need to I just want to go home."

"You're such a hard head."

"I know." I say. Jenna didn't come into class today so it was fine.

When class ended me and kairi walked out next to each other. "Come on just come." He says as I look at him. "Not today." I say as he finally gives in to not arguing with me anymore. "Call me if you change your mind." He says as I wave off and walk away. I put my airpods back in and walk straight out of school. As I approach the entrance of the school mattia comes out of class and bangs his hand against a locker and going straight out the door. "What the." I say opening the entrance. He goes straight to his car slamming his door and sitting there face into his wheel. I think about it before saying fuck it and walking towards his car. I knock on the passenger side of his window as he looks at me. "Please?" I say as he unlocks his car and I take a seat.

It's quiet for a little before I break the ice.

"Are you okay..."

"No..."

"What happened?"

He takes a deep breathe before laying back on his chair. "Did you tell Rowan anything? Or did you talk to him?" He said not looking in my eyes. "No..."

"You don't have to lie to me..."

"I swear... the last time I talked to him was this morning."

"This morning??"

"Yea... I was walking to school and his mom was driving him but he seen me and stopped to walk with him."

"What the fu- And you never told him anything? About this weekend?"

"No why would I? He asked me but I told him it's nothing."

"Really?" He says looking up at me relived.

"Yea... so what happened? Why are you asking me all this?" I said confused.

"... he- he told me you liked basically said you regretted ever becoming friends with us and that you hated us and-"

"Okay no... I don't need to hear more. I obviously never said that and he probably only said that to get under your skin."

"I- I know..."

"Mattia you know I'd never hate you."

"... are you sure?"

"Of course, you're overall my best friend right?" I say as he giggles.

"Missed your ugly ass laugh." I say as he swats at my thigh.

"You forgive me?" He says waiting for an answer.

"Of course... but I think we should just be friends... seriously." I say as he facial expression drops.

"Oh... it's okay... as long as you're happy mae." He says as I smile.

"Well... since I'm here... wanna drop me off at home?" I say smiling.

"Or you can come hang out with us?" He says.

"No kai already tried." I say as he smiles. He starts up his engine and starts heading toward my house.

"Thank you." I say as I get out and head upstairs. I'm glad I made up with them, I mean I never talked to Ale yet but I still wouldn't be able to know what to say. If he still does like me what does he want me to do? Like him? I don't think a relationship or boys in general would be a good idea right now.

I do miss them as my friends, I do hope we can resolve this one day but I don't know to be honest.

Skip to next morning

I woke up and felt dead. My pounding head ache just did not allow me to leave bed.