Bloom//ksj (paused)

No More Dream

While taking the class I noticed how Jimin's eyes pierced to my direction.

Ah shit here we go again.

"So class, we are going to announce the school president for this year." The teacher excitingly announced through the speaker. It lookes like our disciplinary teacher was at the audioroom.

Everyone seemed to be in a joyous mood, everyone seemed to be happy, some anxious for the results.

"Kim Seokjin from class 2-A is the Student council president," before he could finish people burst into happiness. Some boys hugging each other at their friend's achievement.

"Kim Namjoon from class 1-B is the Vice president," another cheer, another applause, another joy.

The announcement was finished, giving us Kim Seokjin, Kim Namjoon, Jung Hoseok and Wook Sungjae as our Student council team.

I simply kept doodling at my notebook. An earphone providing me music to calm down.

Kim Seokjin took my dream spot.

Kim Seokjin took my place.

Kim Seokjin.

Kim Seokjin.

I couldn't take it anymore and abruptly stood up from my seat to unfortunately get center of the attention.

"What?" I asked while lifting one brow and at my response everyone went back to their business.

Not wasting another minute I went to the washroom. Splashing water to my face as I looked into the mirror.

A new guy came after an year of Jungkook's transfer. He was really good looking. He was tall, His figure was healthy but slim. His shoulders were bigger than others, his skin was smooth and he was really gentle.

He smiled warmly at everyone. He answered questions in a gentle way.

All the girls and the boys liked Seokjin instead of Carmen. He was enjoying the attention.

Soon after the mid term results, I for the first time in my life, at grade 7th, lost my position.

I always stood first in my class, but after everything I decided to not care enough about me anymore. Nobody hurt me, but everybody did.

Mentally.

I lost my first position to the boy who newly joined us and it was a really different feeling.

I saw him looking at me in a gentle way. He looked at me for a few seconds and ask, "Are you okay?"

My breath hitched.

"I am blessed." I said with a smile. But I received a reaction I never expected to.

He smiled back at me in a loving way. As if he could catch my genuine answer.

"I am glad."

From then to now, I gradually had came to a point where I was out of tye top 10. I felt good. I never felt the same pressure I had to go through.

To these past few years, our school had received so many gifted students. Far more greater than me. Some old teachers who liked me, knew me, took resignment and new teachers came.

But the few old teachers who were left, kept their hope. They no longer pestered my parents for my studies.

It was at a point where nobody noticed my existence anymore. Nobody cared. Nobody looked at me. Nobody asked whether I was fine.

I liked the way I was.

I am comfortable with me. I was never pressured for being the perfect child again. Because everyone was scared.

Scared.

Scared.