My Bad Boy Best Friend

Chapter 24: (Badboy's POV) Dear Lexi

BADBOY'S POV

Her eyes were, I suppose, what truly broke my heart. I was utterly, completely, devastatingly crazy about her. Every last fiber of her. It didn't matter what she did, she'd have that power over me. The ability to destroy me with just one little bat of her lashes.

"Tytan...I'm so fucking scared." I should've seen that coming, right? And yet.

After Rosie I had promised myself honor if nothing else. I broke that promise several times. It didn't matter all that much in hindsight. And yet.

"Tytan?" She spoke with what almost sounded like agony? I looked over at her for a brief instant. Her eyes were sunken deep into their sockets. Her lips were bruised. I could see her whole body shake in an almost muted way. The pressure weighing her down, tiredness and betrayal and the tears she wasn't spilling.

"Yeah?" I spoke, hesitantly.

I considered in that moment if we'd ever be anything more than what we were in that one moment where I kissed her. We wouldn't, would we? There was too much bitterness there now. I did this. I fucked this up. I could have had the best fucking time with her and I ruined it. And for what? Because she lied? Because she fucked up? Did I really have the right to judge her for it?

"Are you going to go back to her?" I didn't know. I didn't know what I'd say if I ever saw her again. But I couldn't leave Lexi hanging.

"Uh--yeah? I guess...it only makes sense--"

"Oh, okay." I think I broke her heart even more if that was possible?

Then I decided I'd do something terrible. I knew where she was. Texting would be awkward. I had to see her. I had to know. And I'd never do it under any other circumstances. It was awful and selfish but I couldn't not do it.

"Let's go see her now." I said.

"Tytan, just get me back home, for fuck's sake." She sounded tired. Like an internal tiredness that ate her up from within.

"It'll only take a minute."

"You won't listen to me so why ask for my fucking approval?" Her voice quivered.

"You're not--"

"Stop talking to me." Fuck me. What am I doing?

I didn't say anything to her. I just drove. Towards Rosie. Feeling the weight on Lexi's shoulders slowly expand. Her breathing got shallower. Soft sobs erupted. It was this delicate, escalating process of watching her break down.

And it was all on me. I wanted to stop the car and hold her. Wrap her up in my arms and keep her there forever if that's what it took to keep her from breaking down.

We were closer to Rosie's than I'd anticipated. My heart thudded impatiently. This was it.

"Tytan?" Lexi tugged at my arm.

"I--I'll be back in a bit." I said to her.

"Don't go. Please. Please, take me back home." The desperation in her voice fucked me up. I looked at her and shook my head. I had to get out of here. Even if it was just to get away from Lexi's intensity for a moment.

I think she saw the dilemma on my face. She let go of my arm and nodded wordlessly.

I got out of the car and walked up to the door of the apartment building. She was staying with a friend. A friend who knew me. Claire James. Claire never liked me and I didn't blame her. I didn't like me either. The elevator ride made my stomach drop for more than one reason.