Fear And Terror

30 (Beautiful Disaster)

I nodded as I understood this “I am dying” concept. I wanted to yell and scream and laughed like an idiot to Kris for looking into my “bright” future.

But I knew Kris wasn’t lying. I remembered his conversation with Luhan. Kris can really look into the future.

“That’s why I want you to stay here. School has magical barriers. The monsters wouldn’t come in and if you have problems, you could contact the school’s security.” Kris tried to assure me that I wouldn’t be dead as his future told him so. He would prevent that no matter what.

It was quite warming in my heart when he said he will protect me.

My Knight in shining armor.

“Well.” I thought for a minute to say it or not but I know that I didn’t want to stay in this dreaded school for whole summer. “A girl died here even though the school has school barrier.” I muttered under my breath.

Kris heard that and he ruffled his hair with annoyance. “It doesn’t matter. You will be safe here.” He assured me.

“Right. I am going to wait for my soul to be reaped by some unknown monster like a sitting duck.” I said under my breath.

I looked at Kris and his face was red. “Well, that’s why I am telling you to stay here. There is-“ He yelled and it made me mad.

“Well, I don’t want to stay here even though there are freaking magical barriers. I want to go and kill that freaking Eruer to get recognition from my grandfather and be accepted as a daughter.” I yelled back. No matter how much I hate my grandfather, I wanted to get accepted by them. I live as an outsider for whole life.

And I am sick of being an outsider.

I wanted to cry at the moment. My tears threatened to fall out from my eyes. Kris sighed in defeat and said “I know I shouldn’t tell you about your future. I am sorry.” He said in an apologetic voice and left me.

I stopped from crying as I saw Kris’ figure leaving the room. All of the sudden, I felt like my mind went back. That made my heart scrunch and I couldn’t breathe. All I could remember was I was not accepted by the social. People treated me miserable. They didn’t like me as far as I could tell. My friends left me because I am such a bitch.

When I came here, I thought I would be a misfit here and I was right until I went to save Luhan.

He was the first friend I’ve had and I adored him. Kris was my second friend. He is the one who takes care of me and protect me from monsters. Now when he left the room, I felt so empty.

The world is turning their backs on me.

Nobody wants me.

My dad and my grandfather didn’t care.

I have no friends who would play with me.

Am I the worst person in the three worlds?

If you want some friends, I would be happy to be your best friend. A cold and evil voice boomed in my mind and I knew it was Eruer. “Shut up!” I demanded.

Nobody care about you, Jaeyeong. That’s right. Everybody hates you. Now Kris is leaving you, too. I am the only one you have. Just make Kris away from me. Be my friend. Her voice seemed to echo from the end of a long tunnel.

“I said shut up!” I yelled a little louder.

Nobody said life is fair. Choose to be my friend. I can grant you whatever you want when I am fully healed. Trust me. They are good for nothing. Jaeyeong! Revenge! She cried.

Then I could suddenly see her. Her eyes were burning with hatred. Revenge!

I screamed to leave me alone until I saw the blackness in my world.

All I want is love.

Kindness.

I am sick of being alone.

“Jaeyeong.” I heard Kris voice which was filled with worries. No, that’s just my illusion. He’s sick of me. He hates me for not listening to him. I always did things the opposite as he said. I never listened to him and then he saved my sorry ass.

He is sick of me.  

Sometimes I want to die.

I guess my wish is going to be fulfill for the first time because I already got a sneak peek for my death.

“Jaeyeong! What’s wrong?” I heard Kris’ voice again.  My body burned with heat and I could tell Kris was near me. He was yelling not to die on him.

That’s right. Nobody cares about you. Take revenge and let them know that you are superior to them. Eruer’s voice boomed again. This time I could sense my energy rushed through my body. Somehow I felt like I wanted to do something opposite of what she said.

I screamed with all my energy and charged toward her face to slap her for making Kris’ life miserable.

“Ouch. Damn it! Jaeyeong!” I could hear Kris’ voice again. Angry voice. The voice he would use if I did something wrong. I tried to open my eyes and I saw Kris, touching his face and looking at me worriedly with a hint of anger. “What’s that for? Why are you keep abusing my face for nothing?” He yelled but his tone was teasing me.

I looked at him with apologetic look and said “I am sorry.”

He looked at me and rolled his eyes. “What happened?” He asked. I didn’t say anything and shook my head. He then continued his line. “Pack up. Your dad or the driver is waiting for us to go home.”

Us?

“What are you talking about?”

“I am going to be your bodyguard for summer since you want to go home. I didn’t want to leave you alone. So your dad and principal agreed for me to take care of you.” He looked at me and his eyes were telling me to pack up fast.

“Ha-ha.” I laughed like an idiot as if he were teasing me. I looked at his face and it was serious. “You mean you are going to be my babysitter for whole summer?” I yelled in disbelief.

“I prefer the term ‘bodygaurd’.” He made an air quote as he say the word ‘bodyguard’.

I knew it’s going to be turning out as a mess but somewhere in my heart, I was happy to have him for summer in the normal world.

And it’s going to be a beautiful disaster.