Staring at the Sun [COMPLETED]

EPILOGUE

An issue after an issue, a boyfriend after a boyfriend. I never thought bearing this name and face could be that difficult.

Ang pinagmulan? Noong nagkarelasyon si mama matapos silang ma annulled nang papa ko. And it worsen when my father ended up with his mistress.

Iyon ang simula ng pangungutya sa akin. Hindi pa iyon sa salita, kundi gamit ang nakakababang tingin ng mga tao sa akin.

They would always look to me like I'm some kind walking pest or disaster. They had this mindset that I would follow my parent's path.

Pero hindi ko sila sinisi. I was raised good by both of my parents. Marahil ay hindi lang sila itinadhana sa isa't isa at nagtagpo lang sila para maisilang ako sa mundo.

The only person I hated is my father's mistress. She was the one who destroy my family and almost a half of mine.
I was left devastated when they broke up.

But my mother filled all of those. I may be longing for a father's love but she was there. I was complete and still am.

When I was in 7th grade, I had a lot of suitors. Dumami rin ang gustong makipag kaibigan sa akin, mababae man o lalake. I have a huge circle before.

Pero unti-unti ring nabawasan iyon kamakailan dahil sa inggit. I became the campus crush plus I am so active in school. I won on a lot of school pageants I joined.

I also entertained my suitors. Grade 7 pa lamang ay naka ilang boyfriend na ako. Doon nagsimula mula muli ang mga chismis sa akin.

People would spread made up stories.
I was named 'Katkat' or social climber. They would also call me 'igat' because of my increasing numbers of boyfriends.

Hindi nila ako masisi. I was young and exploring. And besides my mother is cool with it as I tell her everything.

"Loren ha wag kang magboboyfriend ng fuckboy."

She would always remind me that. Natatawa na lang din ako dahil kung ang mga kaedad ko hindi magkandaugaga sa kakatago ng boyfriend nila and here is my mother reminding me not to get in touch with fuckboys.

Mas lalo lang dumami ang listahan ko ng mga lalake noong nag senior high ako. I started dating boys in the highet batch not until Miguel started to bug me with his malicious plan.

Our first month was smooth. Akala ko ay magtatagal na talaga kami. But then I may be liberated pero hindi ko pa isusuko ang virginity ko at this early stage.

"Loren Sy! I called you many times this day!" nakakarindi ang boses ni Peter.

"What? Hinaan mo ang boses mo please." hinilot ko ang sintido dahil naririnig ni Miguel ang tawag.

We were kissing! Oh my god that was a great french kiss. Totoo pala ang chismis na magaling siyang humalik.

Though I was thankful that Peter called because Miguel's hand was starting to go all around. Baka mag away na naman kami dito dahil gusto niyang i advance ang making out namin sa sasakyan niya.

"Pinapaalala ko lang sa'yo ang photoshoot natin sa Catalina! Wag kang mali late at baka mapurnada tayo kabuhayan ko to ang pinag uusapan natin!" he shouted on the other line.

Mas hininaan ko ang call volume dahil ang sakit niya sa tainga.

"Okey, you can remind me without shouting Peter. Don't worry I already keep that in mind. Bye!"

I hung up and face Miguel again. Mapungay pa rin ang mata niyang nakatingin sa akin. He didn't leave my waist. Nilalaro ang buhok kong tinutukan ako habang may katawagan.