The Sacrifice Of Happiness

Chapter 12

JULIAN POV

After a few moments, Y/n pulled away from the kiss. Her light pants of breath filled my ears as I stared down at her flustered state. The redness on her cheeks, slowly dissolved, turning her back into her normal self. I felt my lips, slowly start to draw back to hers. It was like a rope was pulling me inwards. I tried to stop myself from kissing those perfect lips again, but the tension between the two of us was unbearable.   It was only broken when Y/n coughed slightly, signaling me to move off of her fragile body. I almost immediately jumped up from the ground and smiled awkwardly at Y/n, watching her flatten her dress out.

"So, what would you like to do now?" The sound of her sweet voice rang through my ears, instantly making me look at her.

"Well there are a number of things we could do-" I paused, looking at my surroundings as if I was searching for an answer. "Horse riding...painting...anything you like. I'm not picky" I spoke. She gave me a short smile before looking down to the ground.

"Painting sounds nice" Y/n replied with a blush. I  lightly chuckled "I'll go get a maid to set it up then. Meet me in the gardens in 15 minutes?" She smiled softly before nodding her head yes.

***

We sat in silence, the only sound being the birds chirping in the trees and flowers around us. I watched my wrist turn in circles as the paint landed all over the canvas, adding to my painting. I paused for a moment and looked over to Y/n's canvas. She had painted a beautiful blue bird, with white dots on it's wing and black on the head. It was surrounded by a ray of different colours, each one popped out at you in a variety of ways.

It was gorgeous.

Just like the girl painting it.

"I've always liked painting. Ever since I was a little girl" Y/n spoke suddenly. Her voice pushed me out of my thoughts and forced me back to my own work of art, that well....wasn't going too good if I do say so myself.

"Makes sense. Your very good at it" I replied with a smile. I watched her glance at me in the corner of my eye before turning back to her artwork.

"It's a way for me to escape the world around me" Y/n confessed. I screwed my eyebrows together in confusion as I moved my head so that I was fully looking at her. Y/n noticed this and also turned to me, placing the paintbrush on the stool that stood beside her canvas. She still had that wonderful smile on her face, but it disappeared when I asked her what she mean't about wanting to escape the world.

Y/N POV

"Ever since I was a child, my parents were always putting me up to high expectations. They would insure that I was ahead on my education and that I knew and understood the duties of being Queen. They always told me it was because they wanted to make sure I knew how to rule before they died...but I'm not stupid. I know it's because I'm girl...not a boy" I sighed, looking down to the ground. It was hard for me to talk about. Throughout my whole life, I've been used to being told by people that a girl should never be in power. They made me feel weak and useless. And you'd think your parents would encourage you do not listen to those shallow comments....but they're just like the rest.

"The only reason why your here is because they don't trust that a girl will make the right decisions as Queen. My parents believe that I need a King to...keep me from ruining Aarland" I paused as Julian lightly grabbed my hands and started to rub them, trying to comfort me.

"My parents told me that you were never keen on the idea of getting married...why is that?" Julian hesitantly asked. I could tell he was scared to ask that question. But he wasn't scared of how'd I'd react to his question...no...he was scared of my response.

"No I do want to get married one day...just on my own choice. I don't agree with the idea of marrying for power and not for love. I know it sounds typical but-" "No I completely understand" Julian interrupted. I glanced at his crystal eyes before going back to what I was saying.

"But you just don't you who you can trust" I breathed. "People say one thing, but mean another, and that terrifies me. Having someone who's supposed to love and care for you...turns out to be a liar who's hungry for power..." I stopped myself from going further into the topic of conversation. I glanced up at Julian, immediately noticing how he was already looking at me with complete....guilt. He was oh so visibly being clawed to death on the inside, which only made me confused.

I looked at him with a confused face before turning back to my painting. I picked up the paintbrush and went back into the rhythm of the brush making it's way across the white canvas. The sounds of the trees moving side to side, helped calm me down after that heavy conversation.

"D-Do you think you'd ever love me?" Julian questioned, ruining the silence. My movements immediately came to a halt as I turned back to face the blonde haird boy. I took a deep breath, taking in his features.

"I could..." Julian's eyes went wide. They were shimmering with what seemed like hope.

"...In time" I finished my sentence. I watched as Julian physically deflated at those last two words. He seemed disappointed.

A wave of empathy went over me the longer my eyes lingered on the Prince than sat before me. His blonde curly hair moved with the wind and his face of sadness slowly disappeared. I took a deep breath one last time before opening my mouth to speak again.

"It just feels like I'm sacrificing my own happiness for the sake of others at the moment..."