Mattia and the unexpected

7 grade all over again.

monday
Im finally going back to school today. I was very tired in the morning mostly because i was on FaceTime with kairi until like 3am but its okay ill get though the day.

My face was still bruised from the accident but its okay i guess. I wore something very simple just leggings and my brothers oversized hoodie.
I still haven't heard from mattia which worries me but he's mattia so I can live.

Alejandro was taking me to school as he would always.

"You haven't heard from mattia have you" i asked nervously
"No sorry but don't worry he'll be back soon" ale replies while parking.
"Have a good day nes" he said while giving me a side hug and walking into school.
——-
LUNCH
I sat down with the boys at lunch and still no sign of mattia.
Robert:"how you feeling"
Roshaun:"does anything hurt you"
Vanessa:"guys I'm fine"
I laugh and start eating
Vanessa:"you guys haven't heard from mattia have you?"
Kairi:"well i haven't but his parents said he's in New York with a friend"
Vanessa:"why would he be in New York"
Ale:"he goes there when he's hella stressed or just can't take the pressure of being here"

Alavro:"yeah his ratass is always leaving us here lmao"

Why is mattia stressed or pressured, I hope he's okay. I thought to myself, since he wasn't in school I had nobody to do my project with so I just fell asleep in my last period.

The next day.
I woke up with a strange feeling ,almost like something bad will happen.

This is the fit. Very simple and comfy.

School was so boring still no sign of mattia though.

As I was putting my books away to go to last period there was a tall male figure standing behind me. I turn around and see mattia.

"So you copy how I dress now" he says while pulling me in for a hug.
We both smile and hug for a little longer than people do. We was both smiling so much but you could tell mattia wanted to hide his smile.

"Where were you" I asked while pulling away from the hug

Mattia:"In New York but am sure you already know that"
Vanessa:" are you okay"
Mattia:" ofcourse why wouldn't I be oh and before I forget you know the things that happened between us I just wanted-
I interrupt him
Vanessa:"it's okay Mattia i know you like me"
His smile drops and he gulps, he puts his arm around my shoulder.
Mattia:"well actually you see I thought I did but you was just like my distraction to be honest"
I push his hand off and looked him straight in the eyes.

"So you used me" I cross my arms and question him.
Matti:"I mean we used eachother for pleasure"
Vanessa:" no Mattia I actually started to like you especially after hearing that you visited me everyday in the hospital and what you just did that to end up telling me you used me"
Mattia:"well I can admit I was worried but I never visited you because I liked you or had any feelings for you"

Vanessa:"so everything was just for pleasure and never meant anything to you"
My voice start breaking within sentences because as weird as it sounds I actually started to feel like I knew the real Mattia but clearly not.
Mattia:"pretty much"
Vanessa:"wow. No literally wow. I'm so used to people using me that I'm not hurt at that ,first my mom Now you. Well I hope your happy Mattia because I fucking am. I'm going to go to class now and find someone else who can just use me again as their distraction"
Mattias PoV:
I had to do what I had to do. Its better hurting her now then later when we're deep into it. She deserves so much more. It hurt me more to let go of her but I'd rather hurt myself than hurt her even more.

Back to Vanessa.
Alejandro and kairi were dropping me back home  but as Marvins  room played on the radio I couldn't hold it in and just started crying.

Alejandro:"shit Vanessa are you okay what's wrong"
Vanessa:"nothing nothing am fine just allergies"
Kairi:"don't lie"
Alejandro pulls to the side of the road and they both just look at me. I wipe my tears and explain what happened.
Vanessa:"i know it sounds stupid as we both technically hated eachother, but everytime we kissed or looked into each others eyes I could feel sparks and it hurts knowing he didn't feel
Them back"

Kairi:"aw nes I'm sorry I don't why he'd say those things"
Vanessa:"then there's my mom who is still in town trying to see me and everything is just coming at me all at once but it's okay am fine please keep driving"
Alejandro:"shit, am sorry you know you can always talk to us and it's just weird for mattia to do that when I saw you two on the hospital bed I even saw the sparks"

Kairi:"I've known mattia for a long time and he likes to push people away before hurting them even more, maybe he's just afraid he's not good enough for you"

Vanessa:"I appreciate this guys I do, but I was only his distraction and to him we had no meaningful moment but ill be okay"
They continue to try and make me feel better but I just wanted to cry and sleep. Not only did I fall for a boy who used me but my mother who left me for a different family is trying to talk to me. I'm not giving her another chance because i know she'll use us again for her drugs and god knows what else.

I cried myself To sleep that night and the few nights after that. I couldn't skip school as I had already missed 4 weeks but I barely paid attention to anything.

I felt like I was back in 7th grade all over again.