My Name Is Depression

Chapter 4

Not everything in the past is worth remembering, but we'll have a hard time forgetting it, particularly the feelings we had at the time. Thankfully, I have memories where I can always find happiness, and that's with my friends. I stared at the white board, recalling when I met Rara and Deo for the first time.

For the second time, I looked and stared at the school. I heaved a sigh while thinking that I'm about to walk in there and smile, laugh, high-five people, and put on a total front. I continue walking in the hallway while watching how happy the students are seeing their friends after summer vacation. How they smile widely for going back to school, sana all.

I bit my finger as I was looking around the area while watching the students. I breathe in while relaxing myself when I can sense that my insides are beginning to panic for no apparent reason.

"Uy, bes daghan ko ug hika! Syet. Init pa ni ug ga asu-aso!"

"Nagsunog napud kag kilay bisan wala kay kilay. HAHA! "

"Tang'na, pre! Gi mingaw ko nimo, labyu! HAHA!"

Jose Rizal Memorial State University is a lot larger than I thought it was. It has a wider landscape and has 18 structures, as I have calculated, and a maximum of two floors per building. They also have a gymnasium near the field. Marami rin akong nakitang mga food stalls sa labas ng campus where in it has a pizza stall, QFC Quintero's fried chicken and so on, so forth. Nakahilera lamang sila pagkalabas mo sa entrance ng university. You have lots of choices kung gutom ka na or like hindi ka nag-eat.

What I love more is that the campus is close to the sea! Pwede akong pumunta roon anytime I feel suffocated by something. The warmth of the sea somehow calms our nerves and our spirit, whether it's the glimpse of the coast, the rhythm of the wild waves, the whisper of the leaves, or the memories you've been able to evoke every time you look at the deep and dark sea. Even with the sound of the waves and the whisper of the winds, we see this as a different sense of tranquility and serene.

The standard of life here in the province is somewhat different from that of urban cities. Nasa list ko ang mag-stay sa isang place kung saan nakapaligid sa akin ang nature. The province has a lot more to offer when it comes to nature, and that's what gets me excited. My parents chooses to live in urban cities because of their business, well, wala rin ata sa isip nila ang mag-spend ng time sa probinsya except now. They didn't gave me the exact details pero about sa business din ang reason why we need to move here.

I hated and loved at the same time this back-to-school event. Hate ko dahil need kong umalis sa dati kong school at iwan ang mga friends ko kasi may kailangan asikasuhin ang parents ko rito sa province. Gusto ko naman ay dahil nandito kami sa province; where fresh air, peaceful life and nature existed. Almost everyone wishes to live in a peaceful environment if they were given the chance to do so. Except if immune ka at gustong-gusto mo sa maingay, puro pollution at traffic na lugar.

Dumeretso na ako sa classroom kung saan ang designated room number ko for my first scheduled subject today. I visited the school two days ago to check and familiarize the place. Their field is actually wider than my future!

I should often expand my imagination, I suppose... To the extent where my future has started to be larger than the campus field!

Inalam ko na rin kung saan ang room ko para less hassle. Even though I can't understand what they were saying, I can still feel the enthusiasm in their voice. Since no one in our family grew up in the province, I wasn't able to learn their different dialects. Siguro I will start trying to learn so I can catch up with them!

Pagkatapat ko sa pinto ay mayroon ng mga student sa loob. Ang ibang girls ay nakaupo sa kanilang chair habang ang mga lalake ay nagsama-sama sa gilid na akala mo may pinaplano na masama.