Amajiki and bunny

Can't Help But Love You

We walked back to the table together and sat next to each other, it felt bittersweet, I was happy i was with him but I also felt so miserable.
Nejire looked at me confused "nice of you to finally show up" she giggled at Amajiki.
He blushed "s-sorry, Kimi wanted me to sit with her but I didn't want to leave you guys and I felt bad just inviting her to our table without asking" he looked a little upset.
Oh, he wasn't supposed to sit with us today then.
I silently ate my onigiri feeling a bit better now he was beside me, even if there was overwhelming emotions battling my mind.
Although I felt a bit awkward and still a little shaky.

"so, what's up with that anyway?" Mirio asked eating his curry.
I looked down, I didn't want any of them to see my reaction and emotions.
I wanted to know if they were together but I didn't know if I could handle knowing, because there was an uneasy feeling telling me they were together as much as I didn't want it to be true.
"I-I, erm... She asked me out" Amajiki stuttered over his words nervously.
My heart raced faster and my head hurt... Please say he said no, I felt bad, shouldn't I be happy that he has a girlfriend? I felt so many confusing thoughts right now.
"come on amajiki tell us, what did you say?" Nejire pressured him.
"well, it was more like she k-kissed me then asked" he blushed as I clenched my jaw trying to calm myself down from hearing him say her lips had been on his.
I wonder what would have happened if we had kissed last night? Would today have gone differently? Maybe we wouldn't even be friends, he might have pushed me away... But I doubt he'd do something like that.
"we know, Clara and Nejire actually saw it happen" Mirio raised a brow.
Amajiki looked up shocked "h-huh!" he went redder, his eyes now on me.
I gulped, why was he looking at me right now!?
I felt my body heat up, Could he just tell us, I felt as if I was becoming a little dizzy again from my bad breathing habits.
I bit my lip and looked back at him "y-yeah, so are you together now?" I asked bravely hoping he wouldn't be able to see the hurt behind my eyes.
He stared at me, was he trying to read my face?
"I - I... I said yes" he spoke softly.
I felt like I'd been shot, my throat dried up, I wanted to leave, I couldn't show how upset I was.
Just hearing him actually say it was painful, for some reason I still had a tiny bit of hope until he said that, how stupid was I, all hope was gone now.

"well that was unexpected" mirio smiled a little looking at his friend with a confused face.
"hmm, I didn't know you knew her that well to be honest amajiki" Nejire looked up seriously, she looked annoyed.
Amajiki looked at them both looking a little uncomfortable and I felt awful, this was my fault, they'd be happy if I wasn't here!
"c-congrats" I tried to fake a smile as my voice lightly cracked, I quickly pulled him in for a hug to cover my face, I wanted to cry so bad.
Feeling his warmth around my body made me need more, I couldn't do this!
He nuzzled his face into my neck... My heart skipped a beat, please amajiki don't do that, I couldn't afford to catch more feelings now, especially now you're with her.
I needed to get over him as soon as possible to go back to being his supportive friend.
I pulled away and he looked down at me "a-are you OK?" he asked.
I went red, why was he asking!? "y-y-yeah" I stuttered.
"no, it's just you're shaking, your skin feels really hot too, you look pale... I'm worried" he looked over my face making my cheeks go redder.
"Amajiki she doesn't feel well" Nejire commented coldly.
"I-I know, that's why I want to make sure she's OK, she can't be ill, I won't let her" he stared at Nejire.
I felt a little shocked at how he looked at Nejire showing a tiny bit of dominance for once, what he said made my heart race yet again.
I felt like I was being tugged by all different emotions, how was I supposed to feel right now!?

There was an awkward tension in the group and it was all because of me.
I stood up quickly "I-I'm going the loo"
"ill come with you, you do look a little pale" Nejire stood up too.
I faked a laugh "I'm always pale" we left Amajiki and Mirio and walked to the toilets.
I let out a shaky breath once we got inside.
"are you OK? You're doing better than I would be" Nejire asked.
I nodded and sniffed trying my best to control my emotions but I just couldn't and started letting it out again, I felt so embarrassed.
Nejire turned to me and hugged me as I tried to speak "p-please, don't be too harsh with h-him, it's not his fault that's who he likes, I w-want him to be happy" I cried.
"I'm sorry, I'm just confused too you know, I don't want to be so cold but seeing you like this makes me want to ask him full out but I know I can't.
I wasn't joking when I said I thought he liked you, even now I still think he likes you, the way he acts around you, he's so comfortable for once but still blushes and is a little shy, I've never seen him like this before" she explained as I blushed wiping my face with a tissue.
"I've never actually seen him talk with kimi before you came to the school, I just don't trust her, I don't know why, I won't be cold with him don't worry he's my friend too, I'm just worried about you and how you feel right now" she rubbed my back.
I felt so lucky, she was far too nice to have to deal with all my problems.
I wiped my eyes once more "I-ill be fine, we will be good friends for now, I want to support him no matter what, but for now I can't handle seeing them together, it hurts too much, I just want everything to go back to normal" I smiled a little.
"well I still want to punch her" Nejire joked giggling making me laugh genuinely.
I adjusted my uniform and went to leave as Nejire grabbed my hand "you... You love him, don't you" she looked at me.
My eyes widened, my heart rate increased and my breathing became shaky... I... Dont know.
That's not possible yet right?
"I... I don't know, Nejire I don't want to think about it, I can't think about that right now I'm sorry let's just go" I smiled as my mind wondered on her thoughts.