She belongs with me

14

{Olivia}

I don't know what happened at Calebs. I don't know why I reacted that way, why I felt a burning sensation, rushing through my body when he locked his eyes with mine. I can't get feelings for him. In the two years I've been together with Liam, I never even looked at another guy. He has always been the only one for me.

As soon as I close my eyes, I see Caleb in front of me, his brown eyes looking directly into mine. I bite my lip and open my eyes again. This can't be happening. I can't have feelings for Caleb, I just can't. It's unfair towards Liam. He's fighting for his life, and here I am, thinking about another guy. I feel stupid, even worse than stupid.

I am the worst.

How can I even think about someone else while my boyfriend is in the hospital?

I grab my phone and call Nora. I need to talk to someone right now. Someone who won't judge me.

'Nora,' I say as soon as she picks up.

'Hey, Olivia,' she says. 'Is something wrong? You sound panicked.'

'I need to talk to you,' I mumble, feeling upcoming tears burning behind my eyes. 'I fucked up, Nora. I am the worst girlfriend ever.'

'Why?' she asks me. 'Wait a second. I'm walking to the bathroom right now. I'm with Isaac.' I nod and bite my lip, waiting for her to speak again.

'Okay, tell me what happened,' she says a few seconds later.

'I...' I stammer. 'I think I might have feelings for Caleb.'

'Oh, wow,' Nora mumbles. 'Does he know that?'

'No, of course not,' I quickly say. 'Nora, what am I supposed to do? I'm with Liam. I love him.'

'Did something happen between you and Caleb?'

'No,' I sigh. 'We haven't kissed or anything. But I held his hand because he was feeling sad and then I...' I shake my head as I feel a tear run down my cheek.

'I felt something,' I mumble.

'You can't choose who you fall in love with,' Nora murmurs. 'But you still have feelings for Liam, right?'

'Yes,' I say. 'Maybe... I don't know.' I sit down on my bed.

'I love him,' I say. 'I really do. But I don't know if...'

'If you still feel that spark around him?' Nora finishes my sentence for me.

'Yeah...'

'I don't know what you should do,' Nora quietly admits. 'I mean, I can tell that Caleb cares about you. But he just got out of a relationship. I don't know if he can open up to you like that. And Liam... He's in a coma. We don't know what'll happen when he wakes up, if he even wakes up. And if he does, he might have some complications. I know that Liam loves you to death. He needs you when he wakes up.'

'I know,' I whisper.

'You shouldn't stay with Liam if he doesn't make you happy anymore,' Nora says. 'But... Maybe you are head over heels in love with him again if he wakes up. Maybe you just need love and because Liam can't give you that right now, you aim more towards Caleb.'

'God, I'm such a bitch,' I sigh. 'I wish I could just talk to Liam.'

'Liv, whatever you decide, I have your back, okay?' Nora tells me. 'I'll help you get through this, even if you decide to take the bumpy, dangerous road and go for Caleb.'

'Thanks,' I smile. 'What would I do without you?'

'Nothing,' Nora laughs. 'I'm the best friend ever.' I laugh and shake my head.

'Nora?' I hear someone ask in the background. 'Is everything alright?'

'Yes,' she says back. 'I'll be right back.'

'I have to go,' Nora says to me. 'Isaac is waiting for me.'

'Yeah, of course,' I say. 'Go conquer your man.' Nora laughs and we quickly say goodbye before we hang up.

I sigh deeply before I put my phone away and lie down.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Liam and I have been through so much together. I can't just abandon him, especially now. He needs me now, more than ever.

'I'm so done with all your bullshit!' I hear my mother scream from downstairs. I roll my eyes. Do they really have to do this now?

'For the hundredth time, I was with John!' my father yells back. 'Call him if you don't believe me.' I groan as I grab my pillow and place it on top of my head, to mute the screams from my fighting parents.

{Caleb}

I'm back in my room again, alone. I dropped Amy off at home once we were done. Now I'm alone again all I can think about is Olivia. My little adventure with Amy didn't satisfy me as much as I'd expected. What was I even thinking? I normally don't do one night stands. Sex without meaning doesn't do it for me, but it was worth a try, I guess.

I grab my phone and see that Amy has sent me a DM, telling me she enjoyed it. I quickly send something back before I place my phone back on the nightstand.

My thoughts drift off to Olivia again. What if she does feel the same about me? I shake my head and sigh. I'd be selfish if I let my feelings get involved. I can't do that. I can't just go to Olivia and admit that I like her.

Why does everything have to be so complicated? I don't know what to do anymore. Camila is still on my mind as well. She hooked up with another guy. I don't feel as devastated as I maybe should, but maybe that's because I'm used to her hurting me. Olivia stood up for me, that's more than Camila ever did for me. She always assumed the worst of me. She even accused me of cheating, while she was the one cheating all along. I don't know why I kept up with her shit for so long. For most people, five months isn't a long relationship. Maybe it isn't. But I loved Camila, and I thought she loved me too for a while. Until I found out she cheated on me, several times. And like the idiot that I am, I forgave her, again and again.