Don't Fall (PJO FF)

18.) Going Primal

C H A P T E R  E I G H T E E N

NICO

Percy was...different. After he stopped cutting two weeks ago he seemed better. He smiled more and his eyes shone brightly. He seemed to be more like himself.

The pack and Will were happy too. They were slowly getting the old Percy back. He took upon our advice and comes to one of us whenever he feels...down and depressed.

He's really trying. I know he is. But even as he's sitting at the Hades table with a wide smile and his sea-green eyes were shining brightly with amusement, there was still the darkness lurking in the shadows. I could see that he was still haunted by his past. Who wouldn't? It's been two weeks but he seems to have gotten better so fast but the inside still needs some work.

I know he still gets nightmares and he's always itching to cut, but he tries to push that away. He used the marker Will allowed him to borrow. Although, whenever we see the dark lines on him we all remember that it takes time. We just have to wait it through.

Hopefully, he doesn't feel the need to want to hurt himself anymore. We all know that we just need to stick by him when things get tough so he knows that we're all here for him.

He doesn't have to go through all this alone.

Which is why even as he looks so happy, underneath he still feels like his life is meaningless. I could tell by the way he goes about things and the look in his eyes. It's weird, I've never been able to read someone as good as I can with Percy.

To me, I can tell all the basic emotions and some of the emotions people bury but that's the extent.

With Percy, I can tell everything he's feeling just by the way his eyes change to a bright green when he's happy and a dark green when he's sad. The way he moves tells me if he's actually slept even though others may not see the difference. I can tell that he feels the same way as two weeks ago.

He still doesn't think his life has meaning. He doesn't think that we care about him as much as we say we do. I know he feels this way but he hides it from everyone. On the outside, you'd think he was just a teenager that had great friends and a great family.

But if you look past the hard exterior, you can see the broken look in his eyes. You can tell his smile is forced and the gleam in his eye was purposefully put there. I can tell that he still wishes he were dead and it's killing him from the inside.

I can see that he's trying so hard to be happy without forcing it because he knows it makes his friends happy. But even as he's trying he knows that right now, he's not as happy as he looks.

I look around and see that no one else seems to notice. They don't notice how his eyes are clouded with pain and suffering but a wall is blocking them from being shown.

And I don't know how to help him. It seems like every day that this facade shows itself, the deeper he falls into the dark unknown.

I frown when I see the dark purple specks showing themselves, fading in and out of his green eyes.

I quickly stand up. "Guys, I'll catch up with you later." I waved to them and ran to the amphitheater where Annabeth normally was.

"Annabeth! I need your smartness!"

"Clearly." I hear a voice behind me and see Annabeth with an eyebrow raised. "What do you want?"