Don't Fall (PJO FF)

27.) Wish to Forget

C H A P T E R  T W E N T Y – S E V E N

PERCY

"Where in the name of Tartarus have you two been?" Hazel almost yelled when we walked through the front door.

"Told you she was going to kill us," I whispered to Nico.

"I never said you were wrong, Percy." We both smiled at each other before Hazel started talking again.

"We were worried sick about you two! Something could have happened! A monster could have attacked and we wouldn't have known. Yes, I know that you can take care of yourselves, but with Percy's weakened state, I was just worried about you two."

Nico and I shared a look before stepping closer to the daughter of Pluto. We both wrapped our arms around her and she gripped us tightly as if she feared we would disappear.

"Sorry, Haze. I just had to be alone for a while. Plus, it was all Nico's fault!"

"Yea—what?! No, you were the one who decided to run off again!"

"Shut up. Both of you," Hazel told us as she tightened her hold on us. "I'm just glad you're okay."

"Percy." I tensed and pulled away from Hazel to look at my mom. "Can we...can we talk? Please?"

I hesitated before nodding, keeping my head down as I followed her to my room. I glanced around the place and my eyes landed on a knife I hadn't put away. I look back to my mother in hopes that she had not noticed it. She didn't even spare a glance in that direction and I mentally sighed in relief. I had told her that I stopped doing that so I didn't want to give her a reason to believe that I lied to her.

"I'm sorry, Percy," she blurted out. I stared at her in shock and confusion.

"Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything."

"That's why I had to say it. You're my child, Percy, my little boy. When you...killed Gabe...I wasn't there for you when you needed me the most. I stayed away from you because I didn't know how to face you. How do you face your son who had just murdered your husband in your house? I didn't know how to talk to you so I stayed away. Then when I had started talking to you, I just pretended to forget because I didn't know if you would want to talk to me about it."

"I didn't. I wanted to forget too," I told her as I sat down on my bed. I patted the space beside me so she could sit down. "When you didn't talk to me, I was in a bad place. I never told you this, but...Luke died. I was out of it for a while and then...then Gabe just had to— I snapped and I hated that he thought he could do whatever he wanted. I tried to convince myself it was the right thing to do after that. It never really worked and I hated everything. I hated myself."

"But not anymore?" she asked hopefully.

I shrugged. "Sometimes I do. I learned to just ignore it. To deal with it. Seeing Will again helped a lot. He tried to help me every day and I guess that kind of works. And...and finding my mate kind of made me go downhill again."

"Wait...the black-haired boy in our living room?"

"Nico?" I nodded. "Yeah. I told him about Gabe and he convinced me to tell the others. Turned out Will already figured it out. I guess that also helped."

"I'm glad they were there for you...when I wasn't. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, mom. I understand."

"But I'm your mother!" she argued. "I shouldn't have done that."

I sighed and leaned back into my bed. "I told you, it's fine. It doesn't bother me anymore, I knew why you stayed away. I don't blame you for that."

My mom didn't say anything after that, but I could feel her eyes on me. I guess she could tell that I wanted to be alone because she placed her hand on my knee for standing up and walking to the door. Before she left she turned back around. "I love you, Percy."

She didn't give me time to say anything before she closed the door behind her. I got off my bed after a couple of minutes and grabbed onto my knife, only staring at it. "I love you, too, mom," I whispered before throwing my knife in a bag and walking out of the room to face the others.

I smelled the cookies being made and that brought a smile to my face. It was a small smile, but a smile nonetheless.

"Can I have pack-cuddles now?" I asked once I saw the pack in the living room.

"Yes! This is the reason why I love birthdays." Leo jumped off the couch and pulled Calypso to the fluffy rug on the floor. Calypso shook her head with a smile on her face. Hazel and Frank held hands as they sat down next to the other happy couple. Leo grabbed Frank's arm and promptly pulled him down to lay beside him.

I glanced back towards Nico who has a look of uncertainty and confusion on his face. "Wanna join?"

Nico's brown eyes flickered from mine to the pack. "I—I don't know..."

"C'mon, please?" I pleaded, my sea-green eyes swirling to purple before returning to green as if nothing happened.

"Okay." I grinned and pulled him and almost dragged him towards the rest of the pack.

Leo and Frank pulled us between the two of them. I saw Nico's face go red as I snuggled closer to him, my around wrapped around him with my back pressed against Leo's.

"You smell good," I whispered to Nico.

"Oh, um...thanks." I laughed and pulled him closer.

"He smells like earth to me," Frank mentioned.

"'Cause you suck," I mumbled tiredly, fighting to keep my eyes open. "And need to open your nose more."

There was silence for a few seconds. "Um, Percy? I don't think I can do that."

"Course you can. Smells like...vanilla...or coffee. Something good."

Frank laughed a little. "Asking for pack cuddles was just a different way of saying you wanted to cuddle up to Nico, huh?"

"...yeah."

"You could've just asked, you know," Nico told me as he poked my cheek.

"Too late now. Wake me up when cookies are done."