Room 47 // Laurmani

Chapter 9

One week. One whole goddamn week. That's how long you haven't seen her, haven't smelled her, or heard her voice or her cute laugh. You're miserable now more than ever; it's hard having someone as awesome as Lauren enter your life just to leave it again. You've been very clingy to Keith as a result, you feel like something is suddenly missing in your life so you've been hugging him a lot recently, which is odd because you're not much of a hugger, but you've been doing it anyway.

Something about leaning into him makes Lauren's absence seem less soul-destroying, but ultimately you're miserable without her and you think you're pathetic because you've only known her a few weeks, you really shouldn't be feeling this way. Your heart is heavy and you're beginning to think your lungs aren't taking in as much air as they used to, and it can't be the cigars because amazingly you haven't had one in weeks, since meeting Lauren you think. Maybe you've been less stressed without realizing it. 

You're meeting your Lauren-replacement today Miss Beer. She left a voicemail saying she'd see you at the same time and in the same room so the transition would "be easier for you". You roll your eyes at the mere thought, fucking easier? Everything would be easier if Lauren just didn't leave you high and dry like this.

You're the reason she left though, all of this would never have happened if you weren't all weird and confused around her. She's thinking about quitting her job and it is all your fault. You didn't mean for any of this to happen. You need to see her, talk to her. 

You're taking calls from computer illiterate people again and it's almost lunchtime but for once you'd rather just stay here. It's not Lauren you're seeing so there's no point.There's no point in doing anything any more really. 

You make your way over as usual anyway simply because you have nothing better to do and ever since you told Dinah about Lauren she's did nothing but ask you questions. Questions you don't even know the answer to. 

You head up to the seventh floor and yet again you walk toward the reception area, this time feels different though, you aren't remotely nervous and it's a nice break but you also kind of miss feeling nervous. Ally smiles at you and you smile timidly back, it's like you both know you're not here to see Lauren and she looks more sympathetic than usual. 

You walk along the familiar corridor and open Room 47. You close the door behind you and offer a pathetic attempt at a smile. Ms. Beer is a beautiful woman; you guess she must be in her twenties, but she doesn't have the best sense of style. She's wearing a floral white blouse with a turquoise skirt and bright matching earrings, she looks like she got dressed a few decades early this morning. She has bright eyes that have a kindness to them, but also naivety and innocence. She has transparent gloves on her hands and she smiles at you as she scrubs the leather chair Lauren would normally be sitting on now, or slouching on to be more precise. 

"Hey there, you must be Normani, Lauren told me all about you. Sorry, I like things clean" she says and she puts the cloth in the trash can, snaps off her gloves and finally sits down. You sit down opposite her and just stare. You're convinced everybody that works here is crazy. 

"You can call me Madison", she says and you just look down at your hands feeling awkward in the silence. "So," she smiles at you and despite how fidgety and nervous she appears to be you think it's actually calming you. 

"So," you shrug and try smiling back. 

"I was reading through your notes-" 

"Lauren keeps notes on me?" you ask quickly. "Pages," Madison smiles civilly, "it's normal to keep notes but I have to say yours are longer than most" 

You chew your lip to fight back a grin. Lauren writes about you, more than she does her other clients. You'd give anything to read those notes, to see what she thinks of you. Then again you'd be kind of scared to.