Perfect Chaos || An Eminem Fanfiction

Chapter 34. Searchin'

Marshall stared down at the tiny baby boy sleeping peacefully in his arms.

Everything was so clear and sharp, the pink of his skin, the brown of his hair, and every intense emotion Marshall felt clearly, it seemed like such a long time since he felt like this, aware and happy.

For years he'd been taking drugs to feel happy, to numb the pain.

It's was this very moment he thanked god that he was sober, it was only three weeks but hell, he was glad he experienced this moment, he had every reason to continue sobriety, his new son, his daughters, Ella and his fans, he made a promise to himself the moment he was handed the vulnerable, crying and helpless tiny baby who needed a father to protect him, not to let any of them down.

In the first moments that he entered the world, this tiny human had filled Marshall with happiness and most importantly a fierce need to love and protect him at all costs.

"Marshall?" Ella mumbled sleepily "You know you can put him down right?"

Marshall looked up and his eyes landed on Ella, who had been sleeping the last few hours.

He couldn't help but focus on her absolute beauty, she amazed him, she had stood by him in his worst and never broke, he was in awe of her, she was seemingly made of steel, she had sacrificed every thing she had within in order to stay by his side, to make sure he stayed alive, he knew deep down that if she hadn't have fort for him so hard and left him, he definitely would not be here today.

She never once passed judgement, not then, not now, not ever.

She smiled at him and waved her hand infront of him "See something you like?"

"Those titties looking full"

"That's what you've been thinking?" She rolled her eyes and laughed "Shame they're not yours anymore then huh"

"I'll let it slide for awhile, this boys gotta learn his place some time" Marshall joked and looked back down at his son "What should we call him?"

Ella thought for a moment and Marshall smiled then looked back up at Ella.

"Jason Shawn Mathers" Marshall said suddenly.

"I love it, are you sure?"

He looked down at his son once more "I'm sure"

"Then its done, The baby Mathers has a name!"

———
3 months later

Marshall wipes his face and chugged down the bottle of water, high from the endorphins that pumped through his body.

He felt great.

He pulled his shirt off and walked up to their bedroom, after running on the treadmill for the last hour he was sweaty.

He walked in the room only to be greeted by Ella sitting on the bed, sorting through paperwork for the coffee shop.

Smirking Marshall walked over, pushing Ella's down gaining her attention.

"Marshall, What are you doing, oh my god" She gasped as he kissed her neck "You uh, are sweaty and uh"

Chucking to himself as her protests turned into moans.

Suddenly there was a Jason's cry come over the monitor.

Sighing Marshall leaned back on his knees "want me to get him?"

"No it's okay, go have a shower, you kinda smell" Ella giggled.

Marshall snorted and got up off the bed and went into the en-suite to start his shower.

Ella laughed to herself as she went into the nursery, chucking on the tiny Jason who had just lost his pacifier, once happy he was settled she snuck back out to the bedroom.

Slipping her clothes off she crept into the bathroom and peeking into the shower, watching as Marshall ran his hands through his hair and stood under the warm water with his eyes closed.

Smiling to herself she slipped into the shower, running her hands up his chest, watching as his eyes snapped open and a smile Croat across his face.

"Sorted"

"He's gone back to sleep"

Like the magic word Marshall lifted Ella's up and pressed her back to the wall, water running over their bodies, he started to kiss her passionately.

This was one of his favourite things, Ella and her body, he kicked himself for wasting so many years with off off his face, her body felt like heaven, when she kissed him it sent electricity bolts down his spine, even now, kissing her bought back memories of when they first met, the hypnotic feeling had returned, he felt as if every touch he experienced with Ella was like new, like the first time again.

He not only had to relearn basic motor skills but he also got to relearn the body of the woman he loved, he got to fall in love with her all over again, he was going to make up for the last 5 years he didn't remember.

Pushing her up against the wall, hands under her thighs for support, he lifted himself and slid into her, hearing moan his name loudly.

He never wanted to forget that sound again, as long as he lived.

———

Marshall laid out on the bed in nothing but a towel as Ella got dressed.

"How are you feeling?"

"Now? After that shower, man I feel amazing"

Ella giggled "You know what I mean Marsh"

"I feel great, this running thing is what I needed"

"Any thoughts you'd like to share?"

Marshall's eyes darted around the room, he knew what she was asking, it was part of the recovery.

"I'm doing ok, just trying to stay focused, when you were asleep earlier I wrote some lyrics, I think I'm ready to start working on parts of a new album"

Ella grinned "That's great Marshall! Have you told Paul?"

"Not yet, I was only thinking about it on my run"

"I'm so happy that you're writing again, you don't know how much of a relief that is for me" Ella said walking over and placing a kiss on Marshall's lips "Any names for the album in mind yet?"

Marshall sat up, tilted his head and took Ella in, thinking carefully before he said the words, as if he was waiting to see her reaction.

"Relapse"