Love Fades Mine Has

Chapter 18: The Love that Pulled me Back

Rose Point of View

I put one foot in front of the other, not knowing where I would end up. But as my I set foot inside familiar grounds, it didn't matter how far I've been but that I had come back. I can't recall a time where I felt more at home than when I saw them again.

I had decided that for the sake of myself and my child, I had to return to court. I knew it wasn't going to be easy to confront everyone, but I could stay away from any longer, Not after seeing the way Dimitri was hurting. It was around Human time when I finally reached the court. Which means it was night time in the Moroi world, so they were mostly all sleeping. Yet some of the dhampirs were up, the ones that were guarding the place.

I had planned this out, so I wouldn't have any trouble getting past security. I wanted to make sure I wasn't seen by many. My pregnancy still had to be kept a secret or at least on a need to know basis. I made my way to the palace; I knew Piper would be awake because she runs in the human schedule unless she changed her ways. As soon as she saw me walking, she froze.

" Guardian Hathaway, I didn't expect you," Piper said as she took my stuff away from my hands.

" I didn't expect myself, but here I am," I said, putting a finger to my lips and signaling her to be quite.

We walked to the room where she set my stuff down.

 "I must inform her Majesty of your unexpected arrival," She said, heading for the door.

"No. That's Ok. I'll inform Vasilissa know in the morning," I sai,d stopping her. 

"Where's Dimitri?" I asked, getting impatient.

"Guardian Belikov is down by the dorms," She answered. 

"I can ask for him to come," She said.

"No. That's fine. I'll go find him. Don't let anyone know I'm here," I said as I headed out the door.

I walked carefully, knowing that walking around the court wasn't the best. I just needed to see him. The image of his plead the last time I had been in Lissa's head came flooding back. If I had told anyone that I was coming back, I probably would have lost my element of surprise. And I wouldn't be able to be alone with him.

I was looking everywhere. It would have been a lot easier to keep watch if it was dark, but the sun's light wasn't helping me at all. I took the stairs heading towards Dimitri's position.

Suddenly I felt strong arms wrap around me and a sharp object to my side. I panicked just before the smell of aftershave filled my senses. I whined at the pressure of the hold but melted to the scent so close to me again.

"I would be more careful if I were you," I said in a mere whisper.

"Why not?" He asked just before I faced him

"You clearly don't recognize me" I responded.

It was like we were dancing as he turned me around to face him. He dropped his stake, and his eyes peered into mine. The only thing keeping us apart was my baby bump. It seemed like hours passed as we stood there quietly, staring at each other speechless. We heard footsteps approaching and that most have woke him up. He took my hand in his and led me to what I remember to be the path to his room.

"Eddie, send someone to my position I need the rest of the night off. I don't feel well. I need to rest for the morning." He said into his earpiece just before he took it off.

As we walked to his room, the only thing on my mind was the feel of his hand in mine. I was so concentrated in the texture of his hand against mine again that I didn't realize we had gotten into his apartment. 

"For a minute there, I thought you were going to kill me," I said

"I could never do that, Roza," He responded.

 "But what were you thinking? Running around Court like that." He continued his voice rough

"So you didn't want to see me. I could easily disappear." I said, looking at him.

"No. Roza, that's not what I meant." He said, his voice growing soft.

"Well, it sure sounds like it," I said

"Don't get me wrong I've missed you so much. When you were gone, I felt incomplete," He said. 

"My heart searched for you day and night," He continued.

 "And the idea of you were having the baby by yourself terrified me," He said as he looked down at my bump.

"Terrified? You don't know what terrified is. I was terrified of my own memories. Once everything started coming back to me. The things you made me go through. After I did so much for you." I said

"Are you ok? Is the baby ok?" He asked

"My baby's fine. I don't think you suffered half of what I went through after you rejected me." I began everything that I had tried to his inside was suddenly coming out.

"But..." Dimitri tried to explain. I  was tired of hearing him. He would listen to me now.

"But what? You felt guilty. Sorry perhaps. What about me? What about all the things I went through to try to fulfill a promise I made to you. What about the pain I felt when I set out to kill the one man I loved?" I said growing angrier

"Sorry, I..." Dimitri said.

"Sorry? So now you're sorry. How do you think I felt when I thought that I hadn't lost my love and then found out that I did. Because he didn't love me any..." I stopped mid-sentence

As his lips suddenly met mine. I was taken aback at first. I was so angry I tried to push him back. But the kiss was becoming a passionate one. As tears rolled down my cheek, his body was pushing against mine. With my face in his hands, I had no choice but to give in. My anger floated away as the kiss turns into something more.

My only thoughts were of the love that pulled me back.