Money Makin' (Completed)

6.

Zuria
Hours later

Laying in bed, I laid my head on Mitch's chest while he smoked a blunt. I was simply catching contact and trying to clear my mind of the constant negative thoughts that were trying to take over.

"Talk to me, Zuria." He spoke his deep voice, making me look up at him.

"What do you want to talk about?" I asked, propping myself up on my elbow.

"Whatever's on your mind, ma." He blew smoke from his mouth, looking me in my eyes.

"There's nothing on my mind." I shook my head slowly but by the look on his face I could tell he knew that I wasn't telling the truth.

"Well there's nothing on my mind that we haven't already talked about so there's no need to bring it up again." I added, clearing up my statement.

I didn't need to keep talking about it, he knew what was on my mind.

"Aight."

"Then let me ask you this.."

"You love me?" He asked, looking into my eyes and I couldn't help but to look down at my hands, feeling on the spot now.

"Hm?" He asked, using his index finger to lift my chin back up to him.

"You love me, baby?" He looked into my eyes, hopeful and I just couldn't decide right now.

I didn't know how I felt. I didn't know what I felt.

"Mitch-"

"Do you love me, Zuria? Yes or no?" He asked seriously, cutting me off as I sat there on the verge of tears.

"I don't know." I spoke, sucking up my tears so they wouldn't fall. I'd told myself years ago I wouldn't cry anymore about this but for some reason it all seemed to be trying to spill out now.

Looking over his face, I could tell he was hurt by my words but he said nothing. He continued smoking his blunt as I laid back down, laying my head on his chest.

We laid there like that for a while before he finally finished up his blunt. When he was finished, he wrapped his arms around me and left a small kiss on my forehead.

"I want to make up for the shit I did, Z.."

"I'm trying to make up for the shit I did to you." He went on, correcting himself.

"But baby I can't do that shit if you still gon' hate me no matter what."

"I don't hate you." I tried to tell him but he shook his head.

"Z.." He trailed off.

"I don't, Mitch." I tried to say but he wasn't buying it.

"Baby, I see the way you look when Marley is around. I see the hurt in your eyes every day." He went on as I sighed, trying my hardest not to break.

"I know this shit hurting you."

"And I'm trying to make it better, baby. I am." He sighed deeply as I listened closely to his words.

"It's been six years. I've been trying to prove myself for six years, Z."

"I'm never gon' stop until I can make it right but I just want you to understand that I'm trying, ma."

"I mean, I asked you to marry me, you told me no. I asked you if we could have a baby and you said you'd think about it but you still won't even let me touch you unless I got a condom on.."

"Baby, its like I don't know if we moving forward or backwards at this point but I'm trying." He went on, expressing himself.

"Like I'm ready to start my life with you but we gotta be on the same page, bae."

"You feel me?" He asked and I nodded slowly, understanding what he meant but things just didn't go away because I forgave him. I still couldn't forget it, my mind just wouldn't stop thinking about it.

Yeah I wanted to started our life eventually but I wasn't ready right now because I was still unsure about what I actually wanted. Then with Marley being here, it just made everything harder but I loved her so much so I could never be selfish.

She didn't ask for any of this in the first place.

"Babe, I just don't know right now. My mind is all over the place and I think the only thing we can do is do what we've been doing.." I trailed off.

"And that's taking care of Marley and slowly trying to make us better again."

"Because just like you're trying, I'm trying too and trust me, it's not easy." I expressed and he nodded slowly.

"It's not easy knowing you had a kid with someone else-" I started but stopped, trying my best to hold it together.

"You decided to cheat for what ever reason so now we both have to deal with the consequences and that's just not knowing what we're doing as of now."

"It's going to take time." I said finally while he nodded.

"I understand that, ma."

"I know I fucked up.." He trailed off, looking into my eyes while I tried my hardest to hold in my tears.

"I was 19, on some dumb shit with my niggas and I fucked up.." He trailed off.

"And I know I blame that bitch most of the time because of what went down back then but I'm the one who stepped out on you so I'm just gon' have to own that shit."

"I'm the one who fucked up our relationship and I gotta' be the one to fix it." He spoke sternly.

"And I'm gon' fix it. I promise you." He went on seriously.

"You hear me, bae?"

"I'm gon' fix this shit." He spoke sternly, looking deep into my eyes and I said nothing, I simply nodded slowly.

*
That night

"Babe, this is horrible." I couldn't help but to laugh as Mitch's big ass laid out on the floor, trying to paint my toenails.

He'd called himself trying to "do what the nail lady does" so that he could save some money but this was a hot ass mess.

"You hatin' on my skills, ma. Marley told me my shit solid."

"Yeah that's because she doesn't want to hurt your big ass feelings." I turned my lip up, watching as he did what ever he wanted on my toes at this point.

"Look." He pointed at the pinky toe, the only that actually had the paint done correctly.

Laughing to myself, I shook my head as he looked up into my eyes with a smirk plastered on his face.

"You know that shit look just like when the lady do it." He smacked his lips at the face I was making.

"Fine, I'll give you your props. I guess that one is actually cute." I playfully rolled my eyes before looking down into his eyes as well.

"You know it is.." He smirked, taking his bottom lip in between his teeth.

"Stop." I played whined, turning my face away from him.

"What I'm doing?" He knitted his eyebrows with a smile as if he didn't know.

"Get out of my face." I mushed his face away as I smiled wide and he chuckled deeply, helping me up to my feet.

"That smile.." He trailed off, trying to be cute.

"What about it?" I sassed as he bent down to mush his into my neck.

"That's all I ever want to see, ma." He spoke into my neck, leaving small kisses as I poked my lips out.

"I just want to make you happy, Z. Whatever I gotta do, I'll do it baby." He went on and I couldn't help but to sigh as I grabbed onto him, holding him tightly.

Lord knows I loved this man especially when he was soft like this. I just didn't know if love would be enough.

*