𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒅 | moonsun ✓

08 | flavour

trigger warning: mentions of eating disorders, swearing, and slight mention of homophobia.

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

I cared less
about myself
when you were gone.
All I could feel was
the weakness in my bones,
and the tears in my eyes.

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆ ☼

"Byulyi-ah, why aren't you eating your food?" her mother asked as Byulyi clumsily sat herself down in a seat in the table, playing with her chopsticks and the pieces of barbecue on the plate. She found her breathing became voluntarily faster in her system as the idea of food drifted across her mind and not in a good way.

"I'm not hungry." she snapped quietly, hearing a sudden gasp coming from across the table. Her mother tried her hardest to withdraw the serious look on her face as for Byulyi's 13-year old sister, Moon Seulgi, tapped her lightly on the arm.

"Moonie, you need to eat to grow strong! Plus the barbecue is delicious, here try it." Moon Seulgi exclaimed as she extended her arm with a piece of meat clenched together with her chopsticks.

Byulyi only shook her head to the suggestion as Moon Seulgi pouted and ate the piece on her own. Meanwhile, the girl glanced towards her other sister, Yesol, who was cheerfully clapping her hands together from their father cutting the pieces of food into smaller ones.

Byulyi's eyes then directed towards the plate of food in front of her, flinching spitefully at the sight and trying to envision something in her head to replace the sight of the food.

There's more than 450 calories on this plate altogether as her head quickly calories counted the meal in front of her. She panicked inside from the final number, shaking her head repeatedly and just wanting to get this dinner over with. However she knew that would never happen as soon as she saw her mother rise up from her seat, making her way towards Byulyi's direction with an expression that was in a mixture of angry within a sea of disappointment.

"Moon Byulyi, if you do not pick up your damn utensils right now and eat like a normal human being I'd just have to shove the food up your own throat."

Her heart practically crashed after her words, struggling to fight back angry tears in her eyelids, her vision blurring.

Her mother had become increasingly more sensitive and insecure for the past few months, and almost frequently she would only release her anger on Byulyi as she is the oldest sibling, meaning more responsibilities came to her over the years. Her mother would yell at her for over every single little mistake that she would mistakenly cause, not even on purpose.

Byulyi doesn't even believe if her mother was aware of some of the words that she would say because the way she expresses it would bring extremely bring down her self-conscious level, and she had already been self conscious to begin with. Her father doesn't get himself involved in anything and most of the time he would agree with her mother but in a less harsh way.

It still hurt her.

A lot.

Knowing that they weren't by her side anymore.