The broken and their secrets [COMPLETED]

Rediscover

Chapter 15

3 YEARS LATER

When you've been hurt before you look for things, problems that are not there and you analyse every situation looking for fault or just waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's strange though with Harvey I had those fears but his affirmations always came at the right time, he knew what I needed to hear before I even knew that was the problem. I would pick a fight and he would let me attack him, he wouldn't even dare to interrupt which made me even more upset. His love language was clear, he wasn't trying to rescue me from myself but he was just showing me that I am worth of being loved. 3 years into this Union and each day I knew that he was the man who for me.
Me"Can we discuss the possibility of me being a housewife?"
We were having lunch in the garden, for once we were both available at the same time.
Harvey"You would die of boredom"
Me"True but you have a private jet, would I really be bored?"
He laughed probably because last year we spent the whole year traveling to different countries in Africa and then we went to Thailand and ended of with a Europe tour.
Harvey"So you want us to get married?"
Me"Hahaha woah! I didn't say that"
Harvey"You said housewife"
Me"I feel like if we get married things will change"
"We have both done this before and it didn't end well"
Harvey"I am not him and you are sure as hell not her, I love you and I told you I will not rush you"
I want to marry him, I really do but what if he changes his mind and decides he wants a third child. I stay up at night and worry about those things, it bothers that Harvey gives and all I do is take without much sacrifice from my side.
Me"I love you so much"
Harvey"I love you too, you know that right? "
I nodded
Me"What if your parents pressure you into having another child? They already hate me, imagine hearing that I don't even have a womb"
He reached for my hand
Harvey"This is about us, everyone else doesn't matter. I was with you that day, I know that decision wasn't easy but it was necessary. I could have left but I didn't, I already have two children and they love you the same way you love them. We are happy and I am okay with how we are"
"Well I want you to be Mrs  Grant at some point"
Me"Let's do it"
Harvey"How romantic"
Me"I know right?, now you are stuck with me forever"
Harvey"I love you"
Me"I love you too"

The following day was a bit strange for me, Harv offered to drive me to work and he never does that because he knows how important my independence is to me but he literally begged me to let him drive. Then he stayed with me, I mean he had his laptop and was working in my office.
Me"What's going on?"
Harvey"With?"
Me"You, am I missing something?"
Harvey"Nothing at all"
He didn't look okay and I was actually worried. My work phone rang.
Me"Hello"
"Busi"
Said Seko sounding like he was in tears or something.
Seko"I need you to come home"
"It's Dad"
Me"Utheni?"
Seko"Please get here"
He hung up and I looked at Harvey.
Me"What's wrong with my father?"
I couldn't help myself, I didn't even want to imagine what my life would be without my father.
Harvey"Your mother said he fell and hit his head, he is still in surgery"
"Let's go"
Ibingathi we were walking to the Airport, for once I was thankful for Harvey's wealth. He already had the helicopter waiting for us, we left for PE, getting to the hospital I arrived everyone was already there.
Mama"Busi"
Me"Bathi unjani?"
Mama"Hay ngu Sathana lo, andiyazi le... Andazi nyani"
Me"He will be fine, you know he will be fine"
Mama"Umdala uTatakho Busi"
Me"Don't... Have faith"
Mama"Yhoo, hay andikho right, Tatakho angandenzi lonto mna"
I gave her a hug
Me"He will wake up"
Mama"Andisoze ndikwazi, not ngaphandle ko Tatakho"
Me"I asked them to organize a bed for you, I'll come wake you up"
Mama"Go to Seko, he needs you right now. This is all too familiar kuye"
"I love you Sibusisiwe and I am proud of you and Seko"
She gave me a hug
Me"I love you too, I promise to wake you up as soon as he opens his eyes"
Seko was seated in the far corner from everyone else, I walked to him and tapped his shoulder.
Me"Hey"
"He will be fine"
Seko"I can't lose another parent"
"I just can't... Fuck...your mother doesn't deserve this.."
I bit my bottom lip, I couldn't imagine my life without my father. A world without my parents isn't for me, they have been my strength and God cannot take them away from me.
Me"Did...did you pray?"
He just nodded then walked away from me, I ran outside because I wanted to cry without anyone seeing me. I just needed to let it all out, I know it's selfish of me to ask God to not take my parents from me but I need more time. I sat outside alone just thinking and praying but never finishing any prayer, I didn't want to sound selfish but I also didn't want to be ungrateful for all the years I spent with my parents.
"Babe"
Said Harvey, I turned around and cried on his chest.
Harvey"You should come inside"

I love love, it's strange how you can be with someone all these years. You learn their habits, you mirror each and other, you fight, you teach each other and then death comes to ruin that. My mother passed away, we were in hospital for my father and my mother died because the idea of life without her soulmate wasn't something her heart could handle. My Dad woke up two hours after my mother died in her sleep, I just felt like someone ripped my heart and they were just squeezing the life out of it for fun.
Me"I...c...can't st..stay...here"
My most toxic trait is that I run, I run when things don't go my way. I run and sometimes I never know when to stop running.
Seko"Busi"
I wiped my tears
Me"Not now"
I got in my uber and I went straight home, I got there and I went straight to bed. I wanted to sleep, in case this was all a nightmare. I needed it to be a nightmare, I needed this to be my imagination because I am not ready for this reality. I switched on my personal phone for the first time since Tuesday and today is Friday. I had a voice note from my Dad, I opened it and listened with tears.
"Sibusi nanko uMamakho efuna ukuza apho, uthi we must go drink wine for the weekend. Nqanda uMamakho, tshi I know she just wants to stalk you because she doesn't even know anything about wine"
My mother was laughing and shouting in the background
"Siyeza Sibusi, we are staying with you the whole week. I need to cook for you, I miss you, andimazi lo Tatakho udikayo"
Then there was a text from her
"I miss you, I feel like I didn't do a good job raising you sometimes because you drift away and you deal with things alone. You have people that love you, I love you and your Dad loves you. It's okay if you don't want us to visit you but we just miss you, I miss you, I do hope you are okay and I hope you know I love you. Just call me and I promise not to inconvenience your new life, I just need to hear your voice"

😭😭