Dead to Me(Human Spinel x Full human Steven)

Chapter 10: Christmas Time is here

(It's so weird to do Christmas and snow when it's the beginning of Summer and hot where I am lmao, But my last book was set in summer so I decided to do winter here)
~No Ones POV~
It was officially December 2nd and the stores were packed. Christmas Music played as Garnet Put the Star at the top of the tree as her girlfriend Maya Talked with Pearl. Steven was in his own world, he felt as if He was floating and on the top of the world, He was in love. The boy spun around humming to the Christmas music as  Pearl looked at him turning to face Garnet and Maya, "Whats got him so happy?" Pearl asked putting her glass of wine down. The three of them looked at the boy smiling as He put marshmallows into his hot chocolate, "He's definitely in love" Garnet said smirking, "How do you know?" Maya asked as Garnet took a seat next to her, "He's literally dancing and smiling, We haven't seen him this happy in years. Whoever this person is they make him genuinely happy" Garner Smiled and looked at Steven grabbing his pills and taking them still dancing around. "Hey guys! Want some Chocolate milk?" He asked sounding excited, "No thanks we're good" Garnet said, "Who do you think it is?" Maya asked, "I don't know, But seriously whoever it is Guy or Girl I'm happy if he's happy and that's final~" Garnet said sitting back as she put a cigarette into her mouth.

Steven told the three good bye as he put on his pink winter jacket that had a bright yellow Star on the back (Like in photo) And his blue hat and ran outside. The snow was coming down so today would be his last Therapy session until it calmed down. As Steven got into his car he turned on the radio and sung to the Christmas music. (There's something about Christmas music that makes me so happy) Steven finally arrived and already frowned hating this place but remembered Spinel and started Smiling again.

As he walked in he saw some friends that he made that dealt with the same issue. Steven Sat down as He talked to one of his friends Lars before hearing his name being called. "Good morning Steven" Mrs. Anderson said, Steven shook his head as he took off his jacket revealing a black shirt, Unfortunately his cuts were still visible so Mrs. Anderson sighed "I thought you stopped" She asked writing in her clip board, "I'm sorry, I had another Panic attack because I have a crush on Spinel and I'm going to Confess but The voices tell me that she won't accept it" He admitted rubbing his wrists, "You have to stop, you know that or we will go to more extreme measures" She said. Steven shook his head and looked at the Fresh new cuts, "Steven are you finally ready to talk about where Your PTSD and Depression started" She asked, and frowned "Now or never I guess" he said.

"M-My mom wanted to have a baby so bad, But when she went to the doctor's they told her she can't or she would die. She still wanted a baby because she wanted this child to see the world and grow up with an amazing dad. So she had me, She died because of me. Everyone tells me that it wasn't my fault or her fault. But I feel like it is! That's where my depression started. My PTSD started since some of her friends one day uh" Steven stuttered as Mrs. Anderson Gave him a reassuring look, "I was around uh 13 or 12 and I was at the park and some of her friends came and Um actually told me I w-was a mistake and t-that it was my fault. They threw me to the ground and grabbed me bringing me to their car. T-They uh started saying that Pink was her favorite color and beat me until I said it was mines as well. One of them was a past girlfriend a-and uh said "You still look like her" Once she was done I couldn't stop yelling for my dad and crying. It's fucked up! It's because she left! This shit is all because she left! But it's my fault that she died and if it wasn't for me She'd still be alive and I wouldn't have had Four people touch me and almost kill me!" Steven wiped his tears as he cried, "I-I've never R-Ran home so fast before, I-I told my d-dad everything and they w-were arrested but the words they said! "It's your fault!" "You look just like her" "Pink was her favorite color" "Your a failure" all repeat in my head! I wear Pink but It always feel's so disgusting but I love it and I hate it! I haven't wore red though since that day" The boy at this point was crying as Mrs. Anderson hugged the boy, "It's okay, Thank you for sharing your experience Steven now I can get a better grasp on what your Panic attacks are" She said, I nodded as I drank my water.

(Why'd I make his backstory so sad Even I'm crying)

As Steven walked out the Therapist office he felt a little better, He got things off of his chest and he felt relieved, He still felt depressed though and His vision was a little blurry and pinkish but He took deep breaths and pulled out of the parking lot.

********************************************
Dear Diary,
I just want to confess already! But sadly Christmas Eve is still VERY far away!
~Steven Universe