14 Days✔

day 12

The rain continues to poor down today. Me and Noah are sat in the small cave at the beach as we watch the rain heavily fall down. Noah has his arm around me and I'm leaning against him, wearing his grey hoodie. It's quite late in the day and the suns setting. His thumb rubs my shoulder slowly as my head rests on him.

"We should really start heading home, Noah." I whisper and turn my head to look at him. "The suns setting and the rains getting heavier."

"Not yet." He whispers back, moving his head back to look at me. A small smile is on his face but it seems forced. I laugh softly, standing up from the uncomfortable rock.

"Where you going?" Noah says, standing up too.

"It hurts sitting on that rock for a long time," I smile, turning to face him. He walks towards me and wraps his arms around me. He buries his face in my neck and I pull him closer to me, he doesn't say anything more and just tightly hugs me, tighter then ever.

"Noah, what's up?" I mumble, running my fingers through his wavy hair. He groans into my neck as a response. I hug him tighter and he groans louder.
"Why are you making that noise?" I whisper. He pulls away from my neck and stares at the floor.

"My mum died 5 years ago today, my dads completely shut him self off so my older brother took Lucas and they've gone out together." He mutters, his arms still around my waist.

"Why didn't you go with them?"

"Lucas was one when she died, he doesn't understand where she's gone yet. I can't bare being around him when he asks when she's coming back. It's heartbreaking." He mutters. I don't respond as I wrap my arms around him again, his face burying in my neck again.

"We can't stand it to tell him she's gone, Mei. It'll hurt him so much." His voice is shaking as he grips onto me harder.

I don't speak as my hands rest on the back of his neck. I feel my heart breaking for him as I hug him tighter to me.

"I just want to be here with you for a little bit longer, Mei." He whispers against my neck, barely audible.

I nod and he moves away from my neck. I smile at him and he forces one back. He slides his hand to mine as we stare out to the rain. For a moment the only noise is the rain hitting the rocks.

"I'm gonna miss you." He suddenly says. I quickly turn my head to face him and he's staring forward blankly.

"Noah..."

"I'm sorry, I just- we understand each other and it's going to be over soon. In two days."

I stare down at the floor, the rain suddenly becoming overwhelmingly heavy.

"Two days and you'll just be someone I met on holiday and I'll miss you so much, I'll miss what we had so much. We'll both go off and move on, we probably won't even remember each other and we'll both get married and that'll be it. Some part of me just wants to stay here with you and be with you- forever." He continues, his voice louder and frantic as he talks.

"Noah..." I say again, slightly louder.

"We have something special and soon it'll be over and it's torture to know that. I wish we met somewhere else but it's not like that would last either because I always move around." His voice is more frantic.

"Noah!" I say louder.

He turns his head to meet mine, our eyes meet for a minute before he looks down at the floor.

"Don't tell me your backing out of our plan to not communicate after." I force a small laugh.

He looks at me again before shaking his head. "I like the idea of it. I'll just miss you." He mutters.

"I'll miss you too, Noah. But I promise I won't forget you." I smile. He smiles back, letting out a soft chuckle.

"I won't forget you too, Mei." He turns his head back out to the rain.

"Why did you suddenly say all that?" I ask, not looking at him.

"Because I'm overwhelmed today and it just all came out, I'm sorry." He laughs awkwardly. "We should get home."

"I want to stay here with you, Noah."

"It's getting late." He shrugs.

"Okay, if you really want to," I turn to face him, no longer leaning on the cave wall.

"I don't want too but I can't stay here any longer."

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"With you! I can't be here and be with you any longer. It's just complicated, okay?" He says, his voice loud. I turn away from him, feeling my heart ache in my chest as he shouts at me.

"Right. Let's get home." I say, my quiet voice in contrast to his. I walk out into the rain and feel it drip down my face and soak through my clothes. I walk ahead of him, hearing his footsteps hard behind me. We walk on the sand, him behind me and my heart in my stomach. What did he mean?

"Mei." I hear loud his voice say. I ignore it, continuing to walk alone.

"Mei, stop walking. You'll hurt your legs." He says louder. I ignore him again.

"Mei! For godsakes please stop!" He shouts. I stop walking and turn around to face him. His eyes are soft and in pain as we stand in the rain staring at each other. His hair is already soaked through and his clothes are clinging to him. 

"What, Noah?" My voice is unintentionally harsh.

"What I said before- it came out wrong."  He mumbles, running a hand through his soaking hair.

I stare at him. "How does that come our wrong? You said you couldn't be with me anymore."

"I love being with you but it hurts. Doesn't it hurt you too?" He takes a step towards me.

"Of course it hurts, I don't want this to be over but we both knew going into this it wouldn't work." I say back. Neither of us caring about the rain anymore. "But I love spending time with you so I try to not think about us ending."

"It shouldn't hurt this bad but it does!" He shouts, his hands madly gesturing around.

"It sucks, Noah. I can't deny that too because I want to be with you but after this you're going back to Italy and I'm staying here. You start university soon and I haven't finished college, we'll be dragged even further apart." I say, my hand moving to his and holding it. It's freezing.

"Then forgive me for this and for making it 10 times harder for us both but I can't stand it anymore."

In a flash, his hand drops from mine. One hand slides around my waist and the other on the side of my neck, he's kissing me hard as the rain pours down onto us. I kiss him back, my hands slide around his neck and I hold him close to me. Like always, my heart races in my chest and my mind clears. For a moment, the cold goes away.

He pulls away a few seconds after. He pushes his forehead against mine.

"I'm in love with you. Mei." He whispers and kisses me again.

"I'm so sorry." He kisses me once more.

"I didn't mean to fall in love but you're amazing." Kiss.

"And perfect for me." Kiss.

"You don't have to say it back." One more kiss, a longer one. I kiss him back for a few moments before being the one to pull away.

"I love you too, Noah." I whisper against his lips, he smiles down at me.

We walk back together in the rain, holding hands and feeling like we can take on the world together.