Flip your phone to understand what the picture is really saying
(A/N) HEY!<3 Omfg, I just watched Stuck In Love on Youtube and it's definitely made my top 5 favorite movies. Seriously! PLEASE WATCH IT, just search it on YT and you will fall in love. It reminds me of Perks Of Being A Wallflower (which is my fav). Ok, most of you probably don't care, sorry, I just had to rave about this. ENJOY LOVES!
*Jack's Pov*
"So, how have you been, Mr. Gilinsky?" The constant tapping of my therapist's pen against the clipboard in his hand drove me over the edge, as I had an annoyed look on my face, hoping he would get the hint... He didn't.
"I would prefer if you called me Jack," I spoke nonchalantly, slouching in the extremely cushiony chair, which made it almost uncomfortable.
"Very well, Jack," he responded with a raised eyebrow, placing emphasis on my name. "Are you... feeling any better?" I pulled myself up, resting my elbows on my thighs as I studied my hands.
"Better." I mentally traced the crevices and lines on the inside of my palms, trying extremely hard to stay focused.
"Would you... maybe like to further explain what 'better' means to you?"
"Well, Mr. Hanforth, I'm trying to give myself a break with feeling all of the regret. And I'm attempting to bring my grades up... I don't know, I guess I just want to change my old ways in a sense." I spoke the last sentence quickly, not wanting to seem too convinced that I truly was making progress.
"That's-That's very good to hear. Anything else you'd like to mention, good or bad?" Mr. Hanforth brought the pen to his lips, creating yet another rhythm, but this time, against something less noisy.
I wanted to bring up Olivia, since she's the main reason I've felt better. But at the same time, I didn't want to drag her into this. Then again, Olivia wasn't meant to be my... "cure". Nothing would cure what I felt ever since the night of losing Elizabeth and Leo. It was up to me to do that, and knowing Liv, she'd be right there to help me. I wanted to be happier for her; I wanted to be the guy she'd be proud to tell others about. But as of now, I was no where close to that. There was still a lot that I needed to prove to Olivia, and show her that she didn't make a mistake. I really couldn't wait to have her in a different sense; to cuddle her in my arms, to kiss her whenever I felt tempted, but most importantly, to be the one she chose to love, and the one I was lucky enough to give my broken love to. I just pray and pray that I wouldn't disappoint her.
"I mean, I don't feel entirely happy yet. I still feel-I feel the emptiness kick in at night often..." I stared back at him as Mr. Hanforth seemed to take in everything I was saying, nodding his head gently.
"See, the thing is that I need you accept yourself, Jack. Until you understand that it was not your fault for the things that happened in your past, it'll be even more difficult to make progress... So, with that said, do you think you could attempt that?" I swallowed the surprising lump forming in my throat, trying to absorb his words.
"Uh, yeah. I'll try my best..." I brought my gaze to Mr. Hanforth's, and as his met mine, I grew uncomfortable, turning away and focusing on the large, old bookshelf to the right of us.
"How are you doing in terms of medication? Does it seem to help you with the depression at all or-"
"I haven't been needing it." I replied quickly, not letting him finish as he pursed his lips, writing whatever the hell was going through his mind on the sheet of paper attached to the clipboard, the sound of the pen against paper ruining the silence.
" I could have your psychiatrist lower the dosage for you, and maybe add a different-"
"No! Sorry... It's just- I don't want to be tied down to any more prescriptions. I'm all set with them." I nearly jumped out of my chair, frantically trying to convince him that I really wouldn't need it. He paused, wide-eyed at my reaction.
"Alright, well, 6:00 next Wednesday?" I nodded in approval, standing up from the uncomfortable chair and thanking the gods above for the end of yet another session.
Sorry for the boring chapter-- > writer's block :(
YOU ARE READING
Velocity-> Jack Gilinsky
FanfictionHe was bad for me; Just as bringing a cigarette to my lips is. But I couldn't resist the urge I got with him. He was my high. "But no matter how damaged, he was still capable of loving, and being loved."
