My 16 months Mission

Mission: a MISTAKE

Hey brother!!!

Please help me get up....

I fell and stuck on you...sorry I disturbed you from sleeping.. please help me get up....I just can't move my body.... I thought of uttering those words to him but I guess he didn't hear me....

Hey....Jo!!!??? Jo!!??? He is yelling at me.....and then calling my mom...
Mang..!!! mang!!!!(Native language in shortcut for mother)... mang si Jojo..!!!

I can hear them panicking and yelling at me calling my annoying name....I don't know why...but I just can't move myself....I wish I can talk....

What's that sounds??? I can hear someone snoring so loud.....is that me???... I tell myself....I want to know what's happening but I just can't move and do anything....but I can hear them yelling at me.... calling my name...

I can hear a rushing footsteps towards where I am laying...It was my mom and my sister wondering, trying to wake me up with tears on their faces....

I can feel the warmth of their hands on my body....I just wished I can move even a little to response but I just cannot....my eyes then totally closed....

I don't have any idea what happened after....

After a while, I hear voices calling me again and this time, I can hear different voices which I cannot distinguish who is calling me....

I want to breathe....but it's so hard??? I need to breathe....give me some air so I can breathe.... I need to breathe..I need to live.... please.....(there are the words that comes to my mind when my sense of hearing is back)

I can feel someone is holding me, crying... yelling at me...

After a while.... I was able to catch my breath again.... I eyes open... I saw my sister holding me sorounded by my mother, my siblings and my neighbors..... as long as they saw me breathing again and my eyes open, I can see a big relief on everybody's faces....

I wonder how long they have been trying to wake me up.....I remember it's was just 5am when I fell unconscious.

When I woke up, it was already sunny like 8-9 am in the morning. I was moved facing the door open facing the bright sky....and I saw someone infront of me getting up from my bottom...

As soon as I come to my senses, I tried to get up to show them I'm okay....but I wonder why I can't .... I tried again with all my strength but I really can't... I can't explain my wondering why this is happening.... I tried again with my full strength but I soon found out that I cannot feel the right side of my body..... I cannot move my right leg and my right arm....
I was very shocked about what is happening to me..... All I did was to cry for some help.....

Why my legs can't be move??!!!
Why it's hard?!!???
Mom what's happening to me!!!!???

I stare at my brother asking for help to get me up but as soon as he saw me asking for help... He then immediately put his arms at my back and under my legs and lifting me up.... I saw his  eyes went wet and wondering while he is carrying me asking my parents where will we go, urgently...

My neighborhood is in panic seeing my brother carrying me urgently going down stairs.....

They perhaps have been there since I was unconscious waiting for any progress I have...

I can see their eyes in a big surprise when we pass....

My tita then offer their Vehicle to send me...but my parents haven't decided yet where we supposed to go.... someone ask them where to send me....

My parents has been hesitant, and seems like they have arguments for me where we should go....

I can hear saying... let's go to hospital!!! no no.. They might inject him something that could paralyze his nerve...and it is expensive to admit him there..we can't afford it now... So where should we be!!??? let's send him to a therapist to check him first..... do you think that's alright??!!! okay let's go then....

We went to a therapist located in the City...so we have to travel about 30-40 minutes to get there....

while we're on the way to the therapist.... I tried again to move the right side of my body....but still so numb....and I barely feel it....my voice also change....i can't say a word... it's only a sound I can make and I feel that my mouth deformed.....and it's been hard for me to recognize their faces....

What is happening to me????!!! I can't explain..... I tried to ask the people around me but all they say is..Huh??? huh????what is he saying?? I don't get it.... Jo???? are you saying something something????? someone asked..... I tried to asked them again but I guess they they didn't understand what am I saying because I cannot pronounce the words clearly.....

As soon as arrived, my brother carry me again and lay me down while my mom is calling someone....

Someone came and touched me like she's doing simple massage.... she then said that she don't have to touched me harder...my nerves may be stress.... She then stop and left me laying and go to my parents....

We stayed there for a couple of hours where the woman just do like asking my mom what happened.... She do nothing to me since she left and face my parents for some conversations.....

After a while, they've decided to go home because it's getting dark... I saw my mom pay 500 pesos for that simple touch she did which I think so unfair.....

After we arrived home.... All I did to is to lay trying to move my body....

I still cannot believe it is happening....

I recently turned to 15 but because of what happened, I can't even imagine what my future will be....

I wish I will be soon wake in this nightmare......

But that nightmare last almost a year until I started to be able to lift my body on my bed...

Author:
I decided not to mention the whole sad experience in this part.... because whatever happened is already done and I treasure it....

After a couple of months, I started to walk like a child practicing to run....

Untill I tend to walk with something to hold like stick to get my balance...

During that day of my life, my memories were not affected....only my physical appearance, physical capabilities, and my balance totally changed....

I also became so emotional... sometimes, its hard for me to stop from laughing or crying.... My approach to everything really changed..... People think that I am crazy....

I've been bullied because of this....

It made me disable to any physical activities.

It stopped me from playing, running, socializing, speaking fluently, and many more....

It also affects my self-esteem and self worth...

The reason why my leaders asked me for Medical Certification is because I am a disabled person...I survivor from mild stroke.... I might not capable to do such....

I guess, going on a mission is a mistake...