Like a Bullet to the Chest (Heathers: a Kurt x reader)

Seven

September 1st, 1989

Summer had finally ended, disappointing nearly every student in town. The Summertime always seems to go by far to fast. Passing by and being lost in the never-stopping flow of time. 

Even when you lose track of time, even when your internal clock shatters and becomes lost in the wind, the days get shorter and the parties get rougher, desperate, to be experienced to the fullest. Stores add on their 'back-to-school' sections and theres nothing anyone can do to stop it. Because everyone is helpless against time. 

The days seem short-lived in retrospect, but thats just how it goes. 

She figured, to find peace with the fact that there's always going to be more lost time than valuable time, was the way to go. Don't think about the moments wasted, because nothing will come of it. There were no new answers to be found in the things you've already known. 

Time itself was always a scary topic, because time referenced to eternity, the concept that when everything ends, time will still march on, nothing stops it. Because it's a dimension, and, in a way, time was eternity. 

Time marches on, even when the house is short one body. When your father starts taking longer shifts at work, and you start to realize the consequence of too much time with your own thoughts. The things it does to your perception of reality. 

Maybe thats why time was a lost concept, why she didn't seem to connect to it. Maybe too many long nights in the empty house, alone and left to wonder when it all became so small. 

When Heather was a part of her life, she'd been drawn to her ability to control her reality. Heather got whatever she wanted, took pride in it, and left it at that. She never dwelled on morals or deeper meanings, she wasn't trapped,. So when Y/n was friends with her, she became envious of that presence, that ability to just exist and not question anything further than that.

"Miss L/n, please stay behind and talk to me! Rest of the class, the bell should ring any-"

The teacher was interrupted by the bell itself, and laughed at the coincidence, "There it is class! Have a great rest of your first day back!"

Y/n looked up, she supposed she should go up to her teachers desk, as instructed.

"Y/n, sweetie, is something going on?"

She tilted her head at the teacher. Middle aged, short black hair and lovely dark brown skin, she was a very pretty woman. Y/n felt bad that she'd caused this woman concern. 

"Mrs Murphy?" She'd asked in confusion. She hadn't remembered much of her first period class. Wondering if she'd done something to cause concern.

The woman adjusted her thick-rimmed glasses and smiled bittersweetly, "You seemed so distant, I didn't see you try and engage with any of your fellow students, you just stared at my desk, I just want to make sure you're okay, honey."

'I just want to make sure you're okay, honey.'

The sentence repeated itself in Y/n's head a few times.  Make sure she was okay? She didn't know the answer herself to whether or not she was okay. But still, having someone ask so genuinely made her stutter a bit, "I- uh.. I'm sorry Mrs, I just-"

The woman shushed her, waving her hand to further portray her point, "It's okay hon, you don't have to if you don't want to, but I'm here. You kids are always expected to act like model students, even when things are wrong. I just want you to know, if you ever need to, you can talk to me."

Y/n's jaw was stuck open. The woman was standing up now, and Y/n's body moved itself as she threw her arms around the woman, "I really don't know whats wrong myself. Mrs." she managed to chuckle, "Things are so hard but I don't know why."