Kaya Pala[On Hold]

04

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When I first met Christan he was a total douche. Kahit sinong babae lang ang kinakama at pinaglalaruan. He was influenced by his old friends who came from the wrong side of the tracks. He always get into fights by some random guys, and the reason…he slept with their girls.

He was a total mess. But he changed, I know and I believe that he already changed.

"Loraine hindi ka ba sasabay sa amin pauwi?" Mariz asked.

"Sasabay ako kay Christan, una na kayo. See you tomorrow!" When they already left I immediately walked my way to the gym. It's still early kaya I'm pretty sure that they're still shooting hoops.

Nang makarating ako sa gym I looked for him but he wasn't there.

"If you're looking for him, he's not here. Octavion came and fetched him," Steffen said as he walk pass me.

Octavion is a gang leader, he was one of those guys who influenced Christan in using drugs. It took him a year to recover from it, and Octavion was put behind bars but an anonymous person bailed for him and that's what Christan told me.

Someone inside me keeps on saying na baka bumalik nanaman sa dati si Christan, pero ayokong paniwalaan. I believe in him, may pinanghahawakan pa rin akong mga pangako at alam ko na tutuparin niya yun. I have to trust him.

It's been a week since the last time Christan and I talked. Naging busy ako for the upcoming exams at naging busy rin siya for their game. It's their championship at gaganapin 'yon sa kabilang school. Wala akong planong sabihan siya na pupunta ako because I want to surprise him.

I've been spending my days with Mariz and Andrea kasi mas nakaka focus ako sa pag-aaral pag sila ang kasama ko. Ngayon andito kami sa bahay nina Andrea. Her parents is always not home kaya she's always left alone with her Yaya Bennie.

"Oh guys I need to go, nasa labas na yung sundo ko," napa angat kami ng tingin kay Mariz nang tumayo ito at nagmadaling mag ligpit ng gamit.

"Is there something you wanna tell us Mariz?" I asked.

"Hey don't give me that look, Alexander is outside and he owe me something kaya sinundo niya ako, okay? Bye," napailing nalang ako nang muntik pa siyang matisod sa kamamadali.

"So, kumusta na kayo ni Christan?" Andrea asked.

"We're fine…I guess," nag-aalinlangang sagot ko. I can see on the way that Andrea look at me that she wants to be enlightened.

"Okay, ito na ikukwento ko na," I paused for a while and let out a heavy sigh. "Remember when Steffen excused me once in our mathematics class? He was supposed to tell me something about Christan but then, Christan showed up kaya hindi niya natuloy, and when I came to look for him nakita ko ang mukha niya na may pasa nung tinanong ko kung ano ang nangyari, Christan showed up again," my face heated and hot liquids are about to fall from my eyes. "And then Steffen told me last week that he's hanging around with Octavion again," I couldn't hold it any longer, I couldn't stop my tears from falling.

"Hey, stop crying. All you have to do is talk to him, trust him Loraine," saad niya at niyakap ako.

"I trust him, but he's giving me the benifit of the doubt Ande-"

Hindi ko na natapos ang dapat kong sasabihin nang biglang mag ring ang cellphone ko.

"Sino 'yan?" Andeng asked when she saw me staring the caller ID's name.

"It's Christan, patuloy mo na muna pagbabasa mo, I'll just take this," agad akong tumayo at nagtungo sa garden.

"Hey,"

[Mahal sorry. Sobrang naging busy lang talaga kami sa practice, babawi ako sa 'yo promise]

"It's fine, naiintindihan ko naman. May nakapag sabi sa 'kin na you've been hanging out with Octa-"

[Mahal, I gotta go bye. Love you]

"I love you," I said almost whispering and let out a heavy sigh when he dropped the call. Gustong gusto ko na siyang kausapin tungkol kay Octavion pero maybe now is not the time, sasabihan niya naman siguro ako pag nagkita na kami.

Kinaumagahan maaga akong nagising, I took a shower and decided to cook breakfast for the both of us.

"Hala nako maam ako na po dyan," natatarantang saad ni Yaya Bennie.

"Yaya Bennie ako na po, kaya ko naman eh," I said and smiled at her.

When I finished preparing everything ay siya ring pagbaba ni Andrea.

"Yaya Bennie sabay ka na sa amin," pag-aya ko sa kaniya at agad rin naman siyang umupo sa upuan na nasa gilid ko.

Nang matapos kaming kumain at magligpit ay umalis rin kami agad.

"So kumusta pag-uusap niyo ni Christan kagabi?" She asked whithout looking at me.

"Ayun nag sorry lang siya then nag bye," walang ganang sagot ko. "Putang! Andeng naman ikaw ata dahilan ng ikamamatay ko eh!" Sigaw ko sa kaniya nang bigla siyang prumeno.

"Hehe sorry naman nainis lang ako kay Christan," saad niya at bumalik na sa pagmamaneho.

"Ako rin naman eh, pero iniintindi ko nalang. At siguro sasabihin niya naman sa 'kin ang tungkol kay Octavion pag nagkita kami,"

Tahimik lang akong nakatitig sa labas ng bintana sa buong biyahe papunta sa school. I don't feel like talking, ayaw mawala sa utak ko ang mga sinabi ni Steffen, none of it makes sense.

Agad akong natapos sa mga pagsasagutan kaya nauna akong lumabas kina Andrea at Mariz. Pumunta ako sa cafeteria para bumili ng pagkain at nagdesisyon na tumambay sa secret garden.

Dito kami pumupunta nina Andrea at Mariz kapag ayaw namin ng sobrang ingay, dito kasi hindi mo maririnig ang ingay ng mga estudyante, presko yung hangin, hindi mainit.

"Anong ginagawa mo dito? Bakit mag-isa ka lang?" Napasigaw ako nang may biglang nagsalita.

"Wala," saad ko at bumuntong hininga.

"I can sense that you're in pain," pinaningkitan niya pa ako ng tingin. "Boy problems," dagdag niya pa.

Kinuwento ko sa kaniya lahat mula sa una hanggang sa mga nangyari kagabi and he was just looking from a far listening to my rants and to every little detailes that I said.

"Hindi ko na alam kung ano ang iisipin ko, naguguluhan ako. Gusto ko malaman kung totoo ba ang sinabi ni Steffen,"

"Talk to him, hinding hindi mo malalaman ang totoo kung ikaw lang man rin ang sumasagot sa sarili mong mga tanong, in order to save and to make a relationship work you have to work it our together," saad niya at tumayo na. "By the way I'm Xavion, nice to meet you," dagdag niya pa at naglakad na palayo.

I spent the remaining minutes thinking about what Xavion said before I decided na bumalik na sa classroom para sa susunod na klase.

=)