stupid shit you don't want to read

Words

I'm making a list of words and phrases I love to say and read and look at and roll on my tongue like cherry flavored hard candies. It will be updated a lot because I'm very forgetful and come across new words all the time. No particular order. Just nice words. Now including insults to use against stupid people or your friends when they're being jack-faced buttholes (see #13.).

1. Dapple. I'm not sure why but it reminds me of syrup. And pancakes on a Sunday morning. Syrup on pancakes. The ones made from scratch though. Fluffy and light and buttery. Not the ones from the bag that taste like chewy flour.

2. Perhaps. People who know me personally know that I love this word. Great for acting pretentious and being obnoxious. Makes one feel important and elegant. P words in general are nice.

3. Babble. Babble. Babble. Ba-buhbuhbuhbuh-bl-
eh. babble

4. Monstrosity. Not sure why. This word just sounds very nice.

5. Cry me a river. I love this phrase with all my wretched little heart. Great way of saying "I don't care" or "I am absolutely devastated". Oooh that's a good one too!

6. Devastate (d) (ing). So much emotion in such a small word. So much impact. I love.

7. You wet sock. This is an insult I came up with myself. After all, no one likes a wet sock.

8. You incoherent lawnmower. Lawnmowers are typically stupid and loud grass eaters. An incoherent lawnmower however, is even more stupid and unnecessarily loud.

9. You hard boiled turtle slapper. Spiderman into the spider verse was such a good movie. Great sound track. Title is too long though. Just call it Spiderman 7.

10. Spider. I have a hate-love relationship with this word. On one hand, spider. s-p-iiiiiiiiiiid-errrrrrr. Very fun to say. On the other hand, the order of the letters bother me and I'm not sure why.

11. Viciously unbearable head ass. If you understand this you are a person of culture let's be friends.

12. Ninny. Both an insult and a nice word. I wouldn't recommend using "ninny" in an argument however because it's not a very strong sounding word. You may end up looking like a viciously unbearable head ass. (see #11.)

13. Jack-faced butthole. Similar to viciously unbearable head ass (see #11.), but in my opinion good to use when arguing about something small with someone who you are friendly with.

14. Bittersweet. Used only by the most elegant of people in the most elegant of sentences. There's also something so romantic about this word that I can't quite put my finger on.

15. Grotesque. Wonderful word with wonderful spelling. The letters fit so nicely together.

16. Wretched. Like a ripe juicy orange exploding in your mouth.

18. Lovely. Such a pleasant word. It sounds so nice and so is the meaning. Love-leeeeeee. Loooooooo-vvvvvvvvvv-leeeeeeeeeeeeey.

19. Tattoo. Like kazoo but much less annoying. I hate the word kazoo.

20. When hell freezes over. Ever get turned on by a phrase?

21. Periwinkle. A lovely word and an even lovelier flower.

22. Morning comes too soon, I wanna wake up on the moon. A wonderful song lyric from a severely underrated song.

23. Knob. Knob. Knob-b-b-b-b-b-b-b. Kn-kn-kn-kn-kn-kn-ob. Knob.

24. You rabid otaku. Found in a wikihow article. It has a nice ring to it too. Ring is a nice word.

25. Ring. Ring-ing-ing-ing-ing. Makes me feel a bit dizzy. Ingingingingingingning.

26. You basement dwelling slug. Perfect for rude people you find in video games.

27. Ingrate. I do not care enough to say you are ungrateful so I will simply call you an ingrate and be done with you.

28. White-knuckle Joyride. I read this on the description of a Gorillaz album. Mwah. Gorgeous phrase.

29. Willfully ignorant douchenozzle. Perfect for just that.

30. Confliction. I made this word. Why? Because I can.

31. Beyond. Beyond beyond beyond. I like. The way. It. Is. Yes.

I ran out. For now. They'll come to me at 3 am and wake me up.