perfectly wrong | ethma

twenty four

weeks have passed and grayson honored my wishes. we said hi in the hallway, but i know we both wanted to say so much more. i've successfully avoided ethan completely even in chemistry. i switched seats with a girl across the room.

"emma, sweetie?" i hear my moms soft voice in my room. "someone's here to see you."

i sit up in my bed as i see lisa walk in. she sits down at the end of my bed with a kind smile on her face. how can she look at me like that? she has to hate me.

"not who you thought?" she asks softly.

"not who i thought, but definitely who i needed." i say as she reaches out for a hug. "how are you?"

i've talked to her about every other day to check in. she doesn't tell about grayson and ethan and i don't ask. i want to still have a relationship with her because it's important to me.

"i should be asking you that," she says as she rubs circles on my back. "it was quite a fight you and my boys had."

that's the first time they've been mentioned to me by her in weeks.

"i think they miss you," she sighs as she releases the hug.

i nod and lean back. "i miss them, but i promise it's for the best."

"is it?" she pushes.

i give her a look and she raises her hands up in defense. "okay, fine." she says. "but if you ever need anything, our house is always open to you. you're family."

i nod and smile. "thank you, lisa. i love you." i hug her again and her phone rings.

she answers it and it's her work calling, so she leaves. i go back into my darkness under the covers.

graduation is next week.

—

the last week of school is always the best time. riley, cassie, emily, and i walk in every morning together for this week. we make sure to end it with a bang, especially since it's senior. we want to go out with no regrets.

"tonight is the night," riley squeals as she locks her arm in mine. "senior prank night."

i pull away. "yeah, i don't know. i'm not really in the mood."

"what? no!" riley whines. "we've been planning this since like freshman year!"

"i know he will be there," my eyes lock with ethans for a split second. "and i can't see him." i see ethan wrap up a conversation and start to walk my way.

"i'm sorry, em. but please! it'll be fun!" emily begs. "it might take your mind off things."

"there's so many people going that i don't think you'll see much of him." cassie tries to comfort me.

"well i hope that's not true," ethan says from behind her. he looks at me again with his charming smile. "hi em, can we talk?"

i'm frozen in place. i cant move, i don't even know if i'm breathing.

"walk away," i hear from behind me. "she obviously doesn't want to see you or talk to you. leave her alone."

"oh josh, you're one to talk." ethan snaps.

josh steps forward and bumps me a little.

"you wanna go there?" josh and ethan are getting close now.

"okayyyy," i step in the middle. "josh stop." he doesn't listen. "thank you, but i got it from here." he looks me in the eyes and backs away. that's the josh i know. that version of him pops out every now and then.