HABIT. banginho

DALAWAMPU.

VIDEOTAPE

PATIENT # 0801
| SUFFERS FROM
INSOMNIA

RECORDING...
[PLAY 00:00:01 ]

VIDEO: [ two men were inside the room, the professional was sitting sophistically on a single couch whilst the patient was sitting on the other couch ]

PATIENT: [ swollen eyes staring blankly to the speaker ]

THERAPIST: I've heard you admitted yourself here in the hospital last Thursday.

PATIENT: Yes. That is true.

THERAPIST: Why did you do it? Is there something wrong?

PATIENT: Lately... [ sighing ] I've been experiencing sleeplessness for a long time. It's kind of torture for me.

THERAPIST: How come it becomes torture? Can you elaborate on your feelings if you're comfortable with it?

PATIENT: [ snapping his fingers ] Well, I can't sleep at night which made me feel tired the next day. Every night... I have to spend being awake trying to not waste my time by doing things that could help me fall asleep— [ pausing for a second ]

PATIENT: Sorry I lost track of my words. Where was I? Ah yes! Furthermore, it's just making me anxious about how to get myself to sleep. A new idea after a failed one is tiring, it makes me frustrated and, I know crying wasn't a solution to all of it but I just have to dig out the pain and suffering to somehow lessen the lonely feeling I've been experiencing. The voices in my head don't help at all.

THERAPIST: [ writing the responses intently ] You've mentioned hearing voices in your head. Do you want to tell me what they are saying so you can't burden yourself more?

PATIENT: [ shifting eyes panning left to right ] I-I can't tell you.

THERAPIST: Why...? Is it something bad? [ eyes wearing a worried look ]

PATIENT: [ gulping ] y-yes. Very bad. They didn't like what I'm doing right now.

THERAPIST: What are they saying? Take a deep breath, it's okay. I'll always try to help you.

PATIENT: [ nose scrunching while hands were turning to fists ]

PATIENT: They...they want me to leave this hospital. They said you will never help me, that you're only doing this as part of your job—

PATIENT: [ voice changed into low pitch ] In short, all of you are fake.

THERAPIST: [ patting his back calmly ] That's not true, all of the voices were only in your head. Don't listen to them. You brought yourself here because you knew you wanted to seek help.

THERAPIST: Remember that you are more than what they tell you.

PATIENT: They're too loud! I-I can't handle them.

PATIENT: [ feeling agitated as he stood up ] NO! You can't demand me what I have and I don't have to do. I'm not a fucking puppet! [ pointing a finger to the therapist ] I'm not like any other foolish people who can be persuaded easily with your filthy words! You...

[ a moment of silence took over the place with heavy pants from the patient ]

PATIENT: [ slumping back calmly on his seat before releasing a chuckle ] It's so much fun talking to you, Doctor Yoo.

PATIENT: Nobody can save me, not even you. No wonder Chan didn't waste his time here.

THERAPIST: [ dropping his pen in the process ] Who are you? You are not the one whom I'm talking with.

PATIENT: [ gaze flickering to the timer ] Oops, looks like we're running out of time. I think we should wrap this up.

THERAPIST: Hey what are you doing— Stop! Security!

VIDEO: [ blacked out ]

SAVING...
[ STOP 00:10:34 ]

—

well this was supposed
to be posted earlier than
today whew.