somewhere only we know

monday 7:07 sander

I am on my bed, I just feel like staying in my bed doing nothing, I need to sleep.
My mom enters my room.
- Honey are you okay ?
I dont answer, I dont wanna talk right now.

She sits on the bed, and touch my hair. I dont react.
- Do you want me to call the school and tell them you aren't feeling well? she asks concerned
She waits for an answer that I dont give her, i am just too depressed right now to do or say anything.
- Okay, I'll call them, and I'll get you something to eat.

She leaves the room and I can hear her talking to my father in the other side of the door.
- He doesn't wake up ? he asks
- No, hum... I think you pushed him a bit too much yesterday, it seems like he is making a depressive episode...
He sights.
- See that's the problem, he does stupid things and then we cant tell him he makes stupid things otherwise he'll make a crisis !
- Come on you yelled at him you didnt just tell him that what he did was dangerous for him.
- Yelling is my way of telling a kid that what he did was stupid !
- Shhh ! Stop he can hear you and he doesn't need to know that you are still pissed at him, he isn't well right now ! Okay ? I'll just call the school and let them know he wont come today.

There is a quick silence that my father breaks.
- He can stay here today, but I dont care if tomorrow he is still not well, he'll must go to school, we cant let him fail another year.

I close my eyes and a tear get out of the corner of one of my eye.
I hate being the way I am. It sucks, I am not a person anymore I am a problem that needs to constantly being handled. Nothing more.