euphoria. (hs)

17

Alex up above. This chap is dedicated to @LoveHS1D because she likes every chapter I've posted and she comments.

I left the house immidetely not sure where I was going to go. All I know is that I need to get away from Harry. It's so weird really. We argue then talk like civil people and then argue again. I don't know what it is with him.

I don't know what got into me, he just.. the list of things he wants and doesn't want me to do.

Who the hell does he think he is?

Harry does not have a say in what I can do. He's not my parents, or anyone important to me. I don't even see why he took me out to dinner and then back to his place? I rolled my eyes agrivated. I should have stood up to him.

"Ugh!" I groan backing out of the parking lot. The nerve of him. I don't even want to go back to my parents house. I feel like I have to be so formal there. I just.. I just need to fucking hurry and find a place so I can be on my own.

I drove toward's Emerald's and Jade's apartment. At least I feel a little more welcome here. I parked my car feeling a little regret. I should have called before coming here. I know it won't be a problem with me sleeping here for the night but I still feel a little bad for just showing up without an explanation.

I opened the door setting my purse down hearing how quiet it was. I walked further into the apartment seeing a flash of light coming from the T.V. I peeked my head trying to keep hidden for a few minutes seeing who was in the livingroom.

"Knock knock." I said coming closer into the livingroom. There Jade and Alex were snuggled close to each other. "Oh hey." Jade said smiling. She broke out of Alex's grip and came to greet me. I hugged her. "Is it okay if I stay for the night?" I asked. "Yes of course!" She asnwered. "Is that okay Alex?" She questioned turning around. I couldn't see his face but I heard him sigh. "Whatever." He got up from the couch and Jade followed him into her room.

Uh oh.

I sat on the sofa uncomfortable. Is me being here that bad?

"What's wrong?" I heard Jade ask. She didn't shut the door but I wish she did. I'm such a nosey person and it comes with confrontations sometimes...

"Nothing. Everything is fine." I could hear Alex answer back. He was obviously lying. "I am not starting this tell me what the hell is wrong." Jade demanded. "Look all I'm saying is when we move in together she's either living full time or she's not coming at all." Ouch.

"What are you trying to say?" Jade raised her voice. "I'm not going to put up with this. Just randomly coming over and using us!" I heard Alex yell.

I couldn't hear anymore of this. I got up feeling hurt and went to the bathroom. I do not use them. Hell I help with groceries!
The last time I stayed with them I helped pay the cable bill.

I wiped the tears that had escaped from my eyes. I will not put up with him. Alex doen't even live here, neither does he pay for shit in this place. I began to cry out of anger and undressed. I just need to shower and go to bed.

Today has been eventful and I'm done. Zayn was not a problem at lucnh time but with Harry and now Alex I cannot take it.

I turned on the shower waiting for the shower water to get hot. Once it became steamy in the bathroom I got into the shower. The stinging sensation felt good on my skin. I just need to relax and get my mind straight. I don't need this right now.

I just need to get a place and take a break from everything. Take a break from people and their bullshit and find my happiness.

I want to be happy, I need to be happy. I can't keep living with putting on a fake smile. The last time I felt so great about myself was when the last time I smoked marijauna. I was out of it, of course, but I had no worries in life. I did not need to fake a few smiles and go on with my day.

Of curse though, I am not saying I am going to go back to putting toxins in my body, but I need to find a replacement, like a rebound but something better than that. Something I can stick with and still be so happy. Hell even if that means buy a cat.

I let the hot water burn my skin for a few more minutes and got out. I looked in the mirror and saw my reflection. A girl bare and broken. A girl with insecurities to from the way her eyes are too big for her head, to the way her skin has marks all over that her younger cousins call tiger scratches, to her wide square feet.

I dried my body off forgetting to grab my clothes from Emerald's closet. Since I don't exactly have my own space in here Emerald bought an extra droor so I can keep clothes here. Also Emerald has enough closet space for me so I can hang my uniforms up.

I left the bathroom trying to not be seen and left towards Emerlad's room. I knocked before.

"Come in!" I heard Emerald yell. "Hey." Is all I said. I walked towards her closet still in only a towel and got clothes out. "So did you hear Jade's and Alex's littler arguemnt." Oh no what happened?

"I heard the begining. Why?" "I didn't hear the begining but Alex seemed really upset. He left the house just a few minutes ago." I frowned hearing about it. And the stupid fight was just because of me.

"Hey is everything alright?" Emerald said getting up from the bed. "Am I a burden to you guys?" I asked. Emerald raised her eyebrows. "No, why would you ask that-"

Jade came into the room. "God Alex is such an asshole!" She screamed. I pointed towards Jade agreeing. "Wait I am so confused. Someone tell me what's going on!" Emerald yelled. "Alex he's the biggest douche out there!" Jade yelled throwing her body onto Emerlad's bed. Emerald nodded her head at Jade and looked over at me.

"Now why did you ask that stupid question." She asked me. "Wait what did she ask?" Jade asked. I sighed not wanting to get into it. "She asked me if I felt like she was a burden staying here."

Jade looked at me and gave me a dirty look. "You are no where near a fucking burden, you understand." She said pointing a finger in my face. I nodded my head in response. She sighed shaking her head. "You heard what he said didn't you?" She questioned looking me in the eyes. "In the begining yeah." I mumbled.

"Wait what did he say?" Emerald asked. "He was a complete douche and said how when we move out Lacey is either moving in full time with us or she's not staying the night at our house at all." Jade said rolling her eyes. "Why would he say that!" Emerald asked offeneded.

"Because he's an asshole that's why." Jade spat. "Jade I'm sorry." I applogized. "No Lacey, babe, I'm sorry that my boyfriend is inconsiderate and has no filter and does not know when to keep his god damn opinions to himself!" Jade yelled out of breath. Both Emerald and I kept our mouths shut not saying anything.

"Sorry guys I'm just pissed off. But remeber no guy will ever come in between us."