Forgive, and Forget (violate)

17. January

Writers note: This next chapter does have scenes of rape, and violence. Continue with caution.

Violet

I've been playing board games with Peter more often. Olivia isn't ever in the mood to play them, and Tate... Well he isn't around. I would rather play them with Olivia, or Tate, because Peter is kinda weird... When I first met him he kissed me pretty fast, then he asked me if I had a boyfriend. Recently he asked me if I lost my v-card, I didn't know how to respond to that since I didn't fuck anyone till I was dead. I just said no, and we kept on playing the game.

'Hey Violet, are you ok?' He asks, breaking me out of my trance. I was thinking about how I yelled at Tate, and how much I wanted to see him...

'Yeah, just thinking.' I say

'About what?' He says inching closer next to me

'Oh, nothing important' I say, giving a weak smile. I look down, and he is just staring at me, and I just look back up with a 'what the fuck' face. He leans in, and kisses me. Next thing I know we're making out, and I just let it happen... I need to get over Tate, just like Olivia's been saying. But things started going too fast for me.

He starts taking off my cardigan, and he starts unbuttoning my dress... Fuck! Violet do something!

'No Peter I really don't want this.' I say breaking from the kiss as he starts kissing my neck. But he keeps going 'No Peter really.'

He pushes my shoulders to the floor, and starts to pull my underwear off. I start trying to push him off, but he takes my hands, and puts them above my head. I'm in shock. I don't know what to do, so I start screaming.

'Shut up you little bitch! If you scream again I'll kill you!' He whispers in my ear... He can't kill me, I stay quiet for a second. Then before he puts his dick in I scream.

'TATE HELP! I'M IN PETER'S ROOM!!!' I scream as loud as I can.

'You little!' He starts punching me, while starting to do it...

'GET THE FUCK OFF OF HER!!' Tate screams with anger all over his face. He rips Peter off of me, then knocks him out.

'Tate!' I say crying, he walks up to me, and I sit up. 'It was horrifying, he was all over me... I tried to push him off, but I couldn't!'

'It's okay, what do you want me to do?' He says with tears in his eyes.

'Hold me.' I say he comes over, and wraps his arms around me, and I cry more. But it feels safe in his arm, and I fall asleep.

I wake up, and he's gone again.. I look up to see he wrote something on my board.

Jan 25 10 am

I start to cry, not of sadness,but of joy.

Tate

I can't take it anymore. I wasn't there for Violet when she got hurt again... And she wants me back as well. Plus if I'm by her side I can protect her at all cost, and her mom said I have changed, so maybe she's right.

I miss her so fucking much, and i'm tired of punishing myself. I want her, I need her, and that will never change.

Violet

We sit in silence for a little bit, and he takes another sip of his beer.

'I missed you.' I say, and he turns to look at me. 'I'm sorry I told you to go away, I know what you went through.'

'How?' He asks.

'Because I can feel the darkness start to take over me, and be pushed away by the one thing you want, but can never have.' I say looking down at my glass. He starts to tear up, but holds it all in.

'I missed you too. I don't want to punish you, I just don't want to hurt you.' He says, and pauses. 'I still see me killing them when I close my eyes. I don't know what came over me, but I'm worried I might do something like that again. It was like watching a horrifying movie, but I was the star. I couldn't control it.' He says as tears fall.

'I'm afraid to, I'm afraid I might fuck up as well. And I might fuck up so bad that you won't want me anymore..' I say with a sigh. He scoots next to me, and puts his arm around me.

'I would never.' I says smiling. I lay my head on his shoulder.

'Even if all the light leaves me?' I ask

'Then I'll be your light.' He says lookin at me, then kisses my head. I smile at that, then look up at him.

'Thanks.' I whisper, and lay my head back on his shoulder. 'I wish we could restart, and go back to the beginning.'

'Me to.' He says.