No Where to go but up ( hawks x reader)

chapter 14

Keigo POV

I sat in the hospital waiting room crying.

My love is gone.

I tried my best to hide my face and calm myself down. But the tears wouldn't stop, neither would my thoughts.

It's my fault, only if I was there for her when she needed me. I could have saved her. I cant do anything now. I'm so stupid. I shouldn't have left her alone.

I felt a tap on my shoulder and looked up to see her doctor.  He looked sad sort of list in a way.

" hello hawks, I'm so sorry for your loss. You where the closes person to her so I need to ask a few questions." He said standing in front of me.

She has been gone 1 total day and I still cant handle it. I whipe my eyes and stand up.

" alright." I said we started to walk off to his office. 

We got to his office door and he opened it letting me go in first. It was a plain white room with a bunch of paper work everywhere,stacked neatly.

" please take a seat." He said sitting down. I sit down in the chair in front of his desk. I never thought this day would come.

" so what do you need?" I asked with no emotion in my voice. I'm still grieving. I cant believe she is really gone.

" first of all, again I'm sorry we couldn't do anything for her. I just need to know about her quirk and a few other things." He put his hands together on his desk.

I slouched over in the chair putting my elbows on my legs holding the sides of my face.

She cant be gone. I need her. I love her so much.

" she diddnt tell me alot about it. But I know she could manipulate smoke. And she could make her feathers sharp. That all she knew she could do. She diddnt really get to practice with her wings since they got injured when she was little. But why do you need to know?" I looked up at him.

" sometimes a quirk can still be active after death. But since she dosnt have her wings there is no chance there. I need to know to put in her file. Now did she ever mention she could heal with her feathers?" He asked.

" n..no, she cant." I sighed my breathing hitched.

" ok thank you. She did put you as the person to make any final decision. I need to ask you if we can do a autopsy tommrow, to see what happen." He leaned back in his chair.

" I thought you said it was from the infection?" I said sitting up straight giving him a confused look.

" yes that's what we think, but we dont know what it did to her internally. So would that be ok?" He asked.

My y/n is gone and all he cares about is what it did to her. He should have done more when she was alive!

" I guess so, could I stay here in the meantime maybe see her?" I asked.

" of course I can take you back now if you'd like." He said and nodded over to the door.

" yes I'd like to see her now." I stood up and stepped aside from the door. He got up and we walked out. We walked in many halls till we where at the back if the hospital. He opened up a big ,white iron door.

The morge

He walked around the room looking at files and name plates.

" here she is. I'll leave you alone. You can leave when your done here." He said pulling out a metal slab with her on it. He patted me on the shoulder and walked out.

I walked over to her side looking down at her pale body. Her face was so white.
Shes really gone. Shes not coming back. My kitten is gone.

The tears started spilling out of my eyes so fast. I couldn't help it but they kept falling down my face.  I couldn't look away from her.
I've seen dead bodies beofre because of my hero work. But this is so much different. I turned around not wanting to see her like this. I put my head in my hands as I cried,my body starting to tremble.

After Bout 10 minutes I had stopped crying. I walked over to her lifeless body and grabbed her cold hand.

" I dont know if you can hear me. But I'm so,so sorry I couldn't save you. I love you so much y/n. I'm so sorry." I whiped my eyes and pushed the slab back into the wall.

I walked out my eyes all red and puffy. I put my hands in my pocket and walked back to the front if the hospital to hear yelling. I looked up to the front desk to see a woman with shoulder length brown hair. Maybe a little shorter yelling and the person at the desk.

" why wasnt I informed! I should of gotton a phone call or somthing! Where is she!" She shouted at the clerk.

Wait. Her friend?

" uraka?" I called out for her and she looked over at me. She was filled with anger ,and sadness.

" why didn't you tell me?" She walked over to me her eyes tearing up. He voicd was shakey.

" i..I'm sorry, I haven't processed this myself." I whispered looking down at her small figure.

" she was my bestfriend. I cant believe shes gone." She started crying and clung to me. I tensed up and wrapped her in a hug as she cried. I rubbed her back as she cried.

" I know. Shes in a better place now." I whispered.

I still miss her so much.

We stood there till she pulled away.

" do you want to get somthing to eat?" I asked putting my hands back in my pockets.

She nodded her head. We walked out if the hospital people stairing at us. As soon as I got out the doors I was bombarded with the news.

" what happen?"

" are you hurt?"

" are you ok?"

" did someone you know die?"

They all asked pushing microphones in my face. I grBbed urakas arm and pushed past them not saying a word. She looked like she was used to it.

" did you drive?" I asked as we walked down the street.

" no we can walk." She said. I noddes and let go if her as soon as we where out of the crowd.

" how long did you know her?" I asked as we walked.

" 3 to 5 years. We were very close." I could hear the strain in her voice.

" I know you diddnt know her that long. But I know you truly loved her. I'm happy you where there for her." She smiled up at me. I sighed rubbing my neck and stopping in front of a cafe.

I opened the door and we both walked in taking a seat. As soon as we sT down I looked over at her.

" it's my fault shes gone. Only if I was there to save her." I looked down at the table.

" that's not true! No one could of done anything. It's not your fault." She gave me a soft smile. I smiled back and the waiter came over.

We ordered and ate in silence. I couldn't stop thinking about her or what I could of done.

" do you want me to walk you home?" I asked looking over to her.

" no I'll be fine. I should get going now though. Thank you, dont be afraid to call." She smiled and put some money on the table and walked off leaving be there alone.
I sighed and payed fir the meal.

That night I went home and cried till I fell alseep.