What Happens in Glastonbury

Feeling like a teenager

With some persuasion from Mollie, I called him that night, sat on my bed in my parents' house I felt like a teenager again, calling a boy, trying to talk quietly so they didn't hear. I was almost a hundred per cent sure I wasn't going to ask him to come here for Christmas like some sort of crazy stalker, but he answered before I had time to even think about what I wasgoing to say!

"Hey you" he said,

"Hey" I replied, attempting to sound cool. And failing.

"I'm happy you got home" he said

"Yeah, thank you for helping me"

"Sure"

"Are you free to talk for a bit?" I asked

"Yeah"

"Good. I have to talk quietly, I'm at my parents' house, they'll be trying to listen in no doubt. I feel like a teenager sneakily calling a boy" I told him

He laughed

"Better not have any phone sex then" he joked

"Definitely not!" I replied, shocked at the suggestion, except my inner voice said hey! Hang on a minute, let's not make decisions without fully thinking this through! I could feel myself getting clammy at just the thought of it.

"Another time" he teased, laughing a little.

"Yeah" I replied. Quickly changing the subject before I got too horny. Alone. In my parents' house!

We talked for three hours that night, I'd never felt so comfortable talking to a guy before.

He told me about his family and his work. He said he was a touring guitar tech for a band, that sounded cool! I told him all about my family, my annoying parents and about moving to London. We talked about exes, he told me about how he was with his ex for 7 years, but she was in the entertainment industry too and both travelling so much made it too difficult to work out. I told him about My ex, Ben, the boy I'd dated all through my teens until I left for a gap year before uni, I told him stories of how Ben was popular, a bad boy and life with him was difficult, always on drugs, always drinking, never knowing if you were with the real him or some fake, drugged up version who was never going to have any real memories of anything we did together. He was always fighting and getting in trouble. I was always just waiting for the day when he snapped and took his aggression out on me, thankfully that day never came but eventually I just had enough.

Jesse couldn't understand why I'd stayed with this guy for 5 years but it's hard to understand teenage mindset once you're an adult.

He was the most popular boy in my school, not that he showed up very often but dating him made me cool and there is nothing more important to a high school kid than popularity.

It was nearly midnight when, against my better judgement, I asked him

"What are you doing for Christmas?"

"Uh, not a lot, my parents have gone on a cruise and my brothers are spending Christmas with their wives and girlfriend's families so I'm just going to spend it with some buddies" he replied. That sounded sad.

People should be with their families at Christmas, even if they're as annoying as my parents!

"Oh"

"I'm going to feel like a spare part at Christmas at my parents' house, my sister is bringing this guy she's seeing so it'll be Mum and Dad, my sister and her boyfriend and me! On my own, joy!" I groaned

"I wish you were still in London, you could have come and saved me from my Christmas misery!" I floated the idea in a jokey way just to see what his reaction might be and to not seem like a total stalker!

"Save you again? I'm not Batman ya know" he replied, not quite the response I was looking for, yep, stupid idea, I shouldn't have said anything! Now I just look like a crazy desperate person having the most loser-ish Christmas possible. Awesome.

"Ha-ha" I laughed, nervously. I didn't know what else to say.

It was awkwardly silent for a moment, probably only a few seconds but it felt like several minutes. I was about to say I had to go and hang up as quickly as I could before it got even worse, when he suddenly said:

"Do you want me to come over there?"

"Uh, no, don't be silly, it's so far!" I replied, dammit! Why couldn't I just be honest?

"Ok, I would though" he replied

"It's so far! Don't worry about it, I'll see you back in London in a couple of weeks" I said, why was my brain against me today?

We talked a little more and then I fell asleep, with my phone on my face!