Never Her

Five

Olivia worked non-stop for the next twenty-two hours. Once she finally arrived home, she felt dead on her feet. For a few moments, she worried about what he was doing but the case was so intense that she was thrown headfirst in. Her focus didn't deter from the victim and the case. She was going full speed on coffee and adrenaline until her Captain sent her home to get more than thirty minutes in the cribs. She felt dead on her feet from being awake for so long from work and Elliot's nightmares.

After she set down her bag and secured her gun, she saw Elliot sitting on the couch watching TV with a beer in his hand. She stood and watched him for a second because he didn't even acknowledge her come in the door. He hadn't shaved and he looked tired and ragged. He looked completely worn down and she felt bad for him.

She made her way to their bedroom to change into her pajamas. She threw on a pair of sleep shorts and one of his t-shirts before making her way back to the living room. Olivia wanted nothing more than to go to sleep but a larger part of her wanted to spend some time with her husband.

Elliot barely glanced her way as she came back down the hall. He was opening the fridge to get another bottle before he made his way back to the couch. She stepped in front of him before he got there. He stopped short and stared at her as she stood in front of him. She looped her arms around his neck and pulled him close to her. "Come to bed with me?", she asks him softly.

His whole body was tense as she spoke to him. "Olivia-", he starts quietly.

"Please?", she begged him laying her head on his shoulder. "Please, El".

He tried to shrug her off and step around her, but she held on tightly to him keeping him from moving from where they were standing. "No." He stated harshly, trying harder to get out of her grasp.

"I sleep better when you're there," Olivia tells him pulling her head back slightly to look at him. "Please", she begged once more.

"Damn it, Olivia! I said no!" He lifted up his arms and with all his forced shoved her backward. She stumbled back, tripping over the coffee table, and hitting the ground hard. She looked up at him shocked that he had just pushed her so hard. "I do not want to be around you! What the fuck do you not understand?" He yells.

Olivia scrambled off the ground and pointed an accusing finger at him. "Don't you ever, and I mean ever, put your hands on me again." She screamed back at him. "This isn't you, Elliot Stabler. I know this is hard but this is not you. Do not ever touch me like that again." She stormed past him and to their room.

She slammed the door loudly behind her. She threw the covers back on the bed and climbed in. She laid down and huffed in anger. They couldn't go on like this any longer. Elliot desperately needed to talk to somebody. He needed help and it was deeper than she thought.

As the anger started to disappear, she got hit with a wave of different emotions. Tears fell down her face and she wiped them away quickly. She couldn't believe how fast their lives had taken a turn. This was not the man she married. He had never pushed her like he had tonight. She kept telling herself it was just because he was stressed. Killing Jenna had gotten to him and he was acting out.

She rolled over and faced away from the door. The tears began to fall harder as she thought about all the things he had said to her the last few days. It made her start to question her ability to be a stepparent and a wife. Apparently, she wasn't as good as she thought she was. It started to actually feel like Elliot hated her. Maybe it was her fault that he lost his job. After all, she was the one who told the Captain what had happened in their home office the night of the shooting.

After about 15 minutes of her crying, she heard the bedroom door open. She tensed up and held her breath as she felt the bed dip next to her. He scooted all the way behind her and snaked his arm around her waist.

He buried his face in her hair and kissed her neck lightly. She tilted her body forward to pull away from his grasp but he held tighter just like she had done earlier. "I am so sorry, Liv." He whispered in her ear. He felt her body begin to relax against his. "I'm sorry," He tells her again.

She slowly turns around in his arms and looks at him. Looking at his face, she couldn't tell if he was sincere or not. All she knew was the smell of beer on his breath was almost intolerable. She reached behind her and grabbed a pack of breath mints from her bedside table. She held in front of his mouth. He gave her a smirk, popped it into his mouth, and let it dissolve on his tongue. 

She just stared at him more before her eyes slipping shut with more tears. He lifted his hand and wiped the tears away with his thumbs. "You hurt me, El. Those words hurt more than I can explain to you. And please, never push me again." She cried out quietly.

He pulled her closer to him, "Never again, I swear. I love you, Liv.". She adjusted her body so she could reach up and kiss him. He cupped her face lightly and let her kiss him for the first time in a few days.

They kissed languidly wrapped in each other. Their kisses were full of emotion as she tried to express her love to her husband. She held tightly onto his face and he wrapped his hands tighter around her waist until her body was draped over his.

Their kisses slowed and became slow pecks. "Get some sleep, Liv", he mumbled into her hair. She rolled back over and he cuddled up to her. She rested her hand over his that was resting over her stomach. With a small smile on her face, she believed that they were on the right track back on getting Elliot better. Tomorrow, she would broach the subject of him getting help. For now, she just relished in the feeling of being in her husband's arms.