Never Her

Twenty-Three

Cragen was sitting as his desk when he seen two officers walk in and look around. He stood up and walked to the door, "How can I help you?" He asks them.

They walked towards him and shook his hand, "Hi Captain, can we ask you a few questions?". They motioned to the office behind him. Cragen nodded and led them into the office.

He shut the door behind him and sat down behind his desk, waiting for them to start asking him questions. "We just have a few questions about the death of your former detective."

Cragen nods, "I am aware of the situation. As you know, his wife is also my detective." He tells them. He was starting to become worried about the investigation. He was worried they were looking into Olivia.

"Can you tell us what you knew about Stabler leading up to his death?" The detective asks flipping open his notebook from his pocket. Both detectives glanced at each other before turning their attention back to the Captain.

Cragen took a deep breath before starting, "Elliot resigned from his job after he shot a teenager in the squad room. It was justified but he wasn't right after that."

Before he could continue, the other officer intrupted, "How so?"

"Well, I didn't see him. However, Olivia came to work very worried about him. He had tried to commit suicide the night of the shooting." He said to them. He remembered back to how worried they all were for him and Olivia.

"The night of his death Olivia had disclosed a lot to me. He had been drinking intensely and became hostile with her. Not too long after that, he became abusive. She came to work with bruises on her face. He had really spiraled out of control." He tells them sadly. The Captain hated telling them Olivia's business, especially something so deep. He could tell how bad Elliot was hurting the woman not only physically but mentally and emotionally.

"There was a report that the cops were called to the household for screaming. Did you know about this?" The detective questions him. His brow furrowed and shook his head. Olivia never told him that the cops were called on them. He wondered how bad it would have gotten that night and why he never heard about it if it was that bad.

The detecives took a second to write down everything the man was telling them. "How about Olivia? How was she acting?"

Cragen seemed taken aback from the question. He wondered if they really were suspecting foul play in Elliot's death. "She was acting as if her husband had just died in front of her. Olivia is a strong person and she has been through a lot. She knows how to compartmentalize really well. She seemed shaken but did not talk much,".

The detectives asked a few more questions before leaving the station.

Cragen came out and motioned for Fin to come into his office. "What have you found out about what happened the night Elliot died?" He questioned sitting down behind his desk.

Fin sat down and sighed, "Not much. All I know is they are questioning the GSR and the blood spatter in the room." Cragen ran his hand over his face and leaned back in his chair. He was really worried about Olivia.

"Can you go talk to Olivia? I am really worried about this investigation." He admitted to the detective. Fin nodded and stood up to go gather his things to go to Cragen's house to meet with Olivia.

Olivia was sitting in Cragen's living room just staring off into the distance. She couldn't stop replaying the night in her head. She felt so sad and so broken. Everything was starting to catch up with her. All of the physical abuse, all of the mental abuse, all of the gas lighting. She was starting to feel guilty about shooting him even though she knew she didn't have a choice. If she hadn't pulled the trigger, she would have died. At the moment, she figured that might have been the better option.

A knocking on the door got her attention. She stood up and walked to the door to open it and see who was on the other side. When she swung it open, she saw Kathy staring back at her. She did not have the energy to talk to the woman but she didn't have a choice.

"Kathy, come in." Olivia says pulling the door open wider to let her into Cragen's house. She led her to the living room where she was sitting before. She sat down in the chair and Kathy sat across from her on the large couch against the wall.

"How are you, Olivia?" She asks. Olivia was a little taken aback by the womans tone. She sounded caring but there was underlying anger there.

"I'm trying to get through. How are you? The kids?" Olivia asked. She felt a pang of guilt in her gut. She had taken the kids father from them. While he had turned into a monster towards her, he was a good father and now the kids don't have that anymore.

"I haven't told them. I don't want to tell them a lie." She bites out towards the younger woman.

Olivia's eyes shot up to meet Kathy's. She saw fire and anger in her eyes. "What would you like to know, Kathy? A lot has happened." She offered quietly. She knew Kathy probably blamed her. She never fully disclosed to the ex-wife. She had no idea the extent of what had been happening.

"Start from the beginning. What was happening? I need to know everything, Olivia."

Olivia took a sip of her drink before beginning, "Things started getting bad after Jenna. He tried to commit suicide the night he shot her." She started telling the story of how it began. It was hard for her to recount everything over and over again to people. She was telling them about one of the worst times of her life. It was personal and it hurt to have to relive over again.

"He began to get physical with me. It started with just pushing during arguements. But, it-" Olivia told her, as she held in the tears as much as she could. However, Kathy interrupted before she could continue.

"Elliot was a good man, Olivia. He would never put his hands on anybody." Kathy says angrily as tears are streaming down her face. She was in total denial of everything she saw before Elliot's death.

Olivia clenched her eyes shut in order to keep the tears from falling. She knew this was going to happen. She knew Kathy would always be on Elliot's side. He was her ex-husband and father of her kids after all. "Elliot wasn't himself, Kathy. He turned into a whole new person. He began drinking a lot and he became increasingly violent." She explained. Kathy kept shaking her head, trying to deny everything Olivia was saying.

"Your kids saw it, Kath. They saw and heard it. Elliot was not Elliot. He was scary and mean." Olivia pleaded. There was no use attempting not to cry anymore.

"I tried so hard. I tried to stop him. He was too strong. It was horrible." The younger woman cried. She leaned forward and put her head in her hands as she sobbed. The memories of that night were playing like a movie in the back of her head. She would never forget the feeling of pulling that trigger. She had shot people before in her career but nothing compared to the feeling of shooting her husband.

"I don't believe you, Olivia. I don't believe what you are saying." Kathy yelled getting more angry with Olivia. She stood up and paced in front of her.

Olivia sat up and took a breath, "I think you need to leave, Kathy."

The blonde woman scoffed and grabbed her purse, "I won't let you get away with lying, Olivia."