Never Her

Ten

Olivia's head snapped towards the door when she heard Elliot walk into their bedroom. He started to change into his pajamas and she continued to stare at him. 

"I didn't know the kids were coming today." She says softly setting her chin in her hand. Usually, he always would have let her know the plans with his kids and he asked her what she thought about it. 

"I didn't know I needed to have your permission to have my kids over," He spits out. He was obviously very annoyed she brought it up. 

She sighed and sat back in the chair, "You don't. I was just wondering why you didn't let me know. You always let me know.". 

"Do you want me to start telling you every second of my day now?" He asks her, slamming his dresser drawer causing her to jump. 

She was officially done with the stunts he was pulling. She was sick and tired of it. "Ya know what, Elliot? You can go sleep on the couch again. I don't want you in here. I don't want to be around you.". 

He looked at her with a hard glare. Olivia felt more bolder and stronger. She stared back with just as hard as a look conveying the idea that she wasn't going to back down this time. However, in the back of her mind she was nervous. Scared, even. She didn't know what was going to happen because he had been all over the board recently. It was hard to predict what would happen next with him. 

"Why?" He asks her putting his hands on his hips and giving her patranizing look. 

Olivia felt her blood start to boil. How dare he ask her why. Had he forgotten the last week? Did he really think she was just going to forget about it? Her heart began to beat wildly that she thought it was going to make her chest explode. She got up off the chair and stalked towards him. 

"Why?" She asks exasperated. She felt the burn in her cheeks as she spoke, "Are you seriously asking me why, Elliot?" 

"Yes, I am." He laughs in her face. "You have acted like such a whiney little bitch. All you do is cry. How can you sit here and cry and get mad at me when everything I do is your fault?" Elliot began to yell loudly. He wasn't even worried about the kids hearing. "Cragen hasn't called you back to work, has he? It's because he hates you, Olivia. Everything is your fault and they don't want you back." 

Olivia began shaking and she moved her hands wildly as she yelled back. "Elliot, shut up! Just shut up!" She tried to take a deep breath but her chest felt tight. Her whole body was tense and she felt like she couldn't catch her breath. She glared back at him as he paced in front of her. 

"You ruined my life, Olivia! You ruined everything! You ruined my career, you ruined my first marriage, you are ruining ours. Everything you touch, you ruin." He roars turning to look at her as he points a finger in her face.

"No, Elliot. I am pretty sure you ruined all of that on your own. Kathy left you because of you." She yells. She knew it was a low blow but she felt the need to get back at him the way he had gotten to her. 

Before she knew it, his hand was gripped her jaw and he had her pressed against the wall. "You better shut the fuck up!" He shouted in her face. 

His fingers pressed into the hollows of her cheeks. Her eyes went wide as she stared back into his. His eyes were wild and glazed over from the alcohol he had consumed before bedtime. Every time she tried to pull away, he gripped her face harder. 

He had her back pinned to the wall. He has all of his body weight pressed into her and she had no room to move. "Do not talk to me like that!" He yelled in her face, spit spraying all over her face. 

Her hands came up to grip his wrist. Her eyes were pleading with his the tighter his hand got. His short nails were digging into her cheeks. It felt like if he squeezed any harder, he would break her teeth with his fingers. She squeezed his wrist tighter as she squeaked, "El,".

Tears began to fall from her eyes as she was able to get her other arm free. She pushed on him and it angered him more than before.

He released her face, grabbing both of her wrists, and pinned them next to her head. He wedged his leg in between hers, successfully pining her completely against the wall. "El, the kids" She whispered leaning her head forward. She was going to try anything she could to get him to calm down. "Please, Elliot." She whispers directly in his ear.

Olivia could hear his breathing in her ear as it began to pick up. "Don't talk to me about my fucking kids, Olivia! How many times do I have to tell you that?" He screams hard in her face. She wondered how long it would be before his throat hurts because of the force in which he was yelling at her. 

"They aren't your fucking kids! You may think they are but news flash, Olivia. They aren't. You are so useless you can't even give me another baby. You are nothing compared to the wife Kathy was." He was so close to her face she had to turn away so she could breathe. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to calm down. 

Panic began to rise within her and she could no longer control her breathing. "Let me go," she whimpered as the tears began falling at a rapid pace. He took her arms and yanked her forward till she fell on the ground. She let out a yelp as a pain from her wound shot through her leg. 

He knelt over her as she tried to sit up to craddle her leg. He pushed her back down and stared down at her. Memories of Sealview started to flash through her mind as she watched him hover above her. 

"You are nothing, Olivia. You are nothing to me. You are nothing to my kids. You are nothing to the squad." He growled pinning her hands to the floor. His knees rested beside her ribcage. 

Her breaths were coming out in shallow pants as she blinked her eyes rapidly trying to get the image of Harris flashed through the back of her mind. She felt the fear she had in that basement start to return to her body. Elliot kept yelling but soon, she couldn't hear his words. She completely disassociated from reality. 

What brought her back was a hard smack across her face, "Are you even listening to me?" He screamed. "You are so worthless and pathetic. Everyone whispered about how pathetic you were after Sealview but now I see it. Pathetic." 

Olivia finally felt like her voice came back, "Get off! Get the fuck off!" Her legs swung up carelessly. She finally wretched her arms to the side to break from his grip and knocked him off of her. 

She got up but he grabbed her hair stopping her from getting any farther. As he yanked on her hair, she let out a loud yelp. 

All of a sudden, there is a timid knock on the bedroom door. He quickly lets Olivia go and she rushes into the bathroom before the door opened.