The Last of Us part III Ellie's Redemption

Lonesome Girl

Things hadn't worked out for Ellie on her return to Jackson, Dina wouldn't talk to her and she just wanted to hold J.J. again.
She had lied to Tommy, told him Abby was dead. Tommy wasn't doing so well, the brain damage had left him a different man to the one Ellie knew. He was want to cycles of anger and outbursts, the sort Ellie had left behind her in Santa Barbara. Ellie found she couldn't be around her surrogate uncle anymore.
Ellie couldn't be around anyone, she was angry at herself and what she'd lost, but more than that was the realisation of emptiness and acceptance of her predicament.
She was alone in her home, settling back into a routine had been hard and she knew she couldn't stay in Jackson anymore.
Maria had tried her best to help Ellie, she always did, but it wasn't enough. Even insisting Ellie relearn the guitar left handed to rediscover Joel's gift to her but she'd given up on that idea almost immediately.
It was January, long since Joel's death and it was no easier to come to terms with. She had stopped herself from killing Abby, no, Joel had. He had come to her at her moment of need, stopped her from stepping over a point of no return.
She had done the right thing, she knew it, but she had beaten herself up over her decision.
Christmas had been lonely, she had spent as little time as possible thinking about it, killing infected was a job that didn't stand still for silly sentiments.
Ellie would leave Jackson for good tomorrow morning whilst on patrol and never look back. She could find a way to survive out in the world on her own, she had since Riley had died, she could do it again now Joel was gone too.
With nothing left she had thought for a long time that surely there had to be someone out there who could make a cure, surely more than one person was capable.
Had the world gone so far that it wasn't even worth looking for a cure anymore? No, Joel would understand, this all had to mean something or her life truly meant nothing anymore.
She wrote in her book about what she was going to do then after what seemed like another hour her brain finally showed her mercy and let her sleep.
Her sleep was never easy and she would always suffer from PTSD.

Ellie hadn't slept well, she couldn't remember the last time she had. She was at least ready for her rounds and had been put with a guy called Rich. He was in his early twenties, from Ohio, he had come to Jackson with his mom about a year after Ellie and Joel had arrived. Like everyone else who had made it there, they had their horror stories to tell.
His dad had been killed trying to protect his family against a group called the Pegasus, from Indiana. Rich and his mom had managed to escape but the trek hadn't been easy. They had come upon a group of survivors who seemed okay at first but they weren't what they seemed either. They had serious racial undertones and Rich hadn't been lack in noticing only he and his mom, Lacey, were the only ones in the group who weren't Caucasian. He had caught wind of a conversation from one of the group that they planned to sacrifice him and Lacey for a strong spring reap when harvesting came. The group were called the New Eagles. They moved on in the middle of the night and finally made it to Jackson.

Ellie hadn't really opened up to him but welcomed his constant chatter to save herself from it. They'd been friends ever since he and his mom had introduced themselves, he was likeable and seeing how protective he was of his mom had endeared himself to her, even Joel had liked him. Although she couldn't help finding him boring at times he was a good guy and was a demon with a bow.
That morning orders were given and Ellie mounted her horse Pisces and headed out with Rich. She would scavenge whatever she could on this trip and wait until they'd completed a good span of their patrol before leaving Rich. No relief was coming for Ellie in any shape or form, she was resigned to it.
Rich sparked up the conversation as was usual between the pair.

"So Ellie, you want to hang out tonight? Nothing special, just you know, watch a movie, I know you like those ninja flicks." He seemed really excited at the idea.
"I can't, maybe another night." Ellie sighed, she kept her eyes on the path ahead fearing she might give something away in her eyes.
"Oh, okay. You promise?"
"Pfft, maybe."
"What kind of answer is that Ell?"
"I'll think about it Rich, I'm not saying no."
"Aww, come on, I'll make us a meal. I take it you do eat, you wouldn't know looking at how skinny you are."
"I don't need a lecture on my weight."
"I'm only saying it because I'm worried, I actually care about my friends."
Ellie knew this. "I'm fine, trust me, any infected get in our way you'll see first hand."
"Hey I've never refuted you're a badass have I?" Rich asked, feigning hurt.
She looked at him frowning. "Let's just do what we do best, kill infected."
"No one's better at it than us Ell." Rich said happily.
Ellie nodded looking out at the melancholy blue ahead. Snow was coming down at a fair rate by now. She put her hood up.
"When we get back home, come and have a meal with me and mom, it'll warm you up. I'd really love it, we don't get to hang out much outside of patrols."
"I'd be awful company." Ellie didn't want to argue about it, she just wanted him to change the subject.
"No you wouldn't, I enjoy your company and you can even be funny at times." Rich could see his attempts to cheer Ellie up were falling short. "Are you alright? I can tell something's up. Just come for the meal, mom likes you ya know."
She'll want to know everything that's going on with me, no thanks she thought. "Yeah sure, I'm fine...and thanks for the offer, I appreciate it and say hi to your mom."
"I won't take no for an answer Ellie. I know how stubborn you are but you're not winning this one."
Ellie smiled weakly. "Don't be a dick."
"I'll be a dick if it means cheering you up. And don't think I didn't notice your smile, your hood doesn't hide it. So are you coming? Yes or yes? You're not playing the Lone Wolf anymore, I'm here when you need me." Rich was smiling cheek to cheek, he wouldn't let it drop so Ellie decided it was easier to lie.
She thought of Joel, she sighed, she had never taken the time to really understand why he had lied to her when he was alive, now she did it still hurt not being able to tell him.
"Okay cool, your mom's food is to die for, now shut up about it man, because you're a sap, you know that." Ellie looked at him shaking her head. She was clearly stressed by his needless pandering.
"So that's a yes?"
"Yeah. Let's just complete our rounds before we talk anymore about it. I want to focus on the business at hand, clear up this mess so there's safe passage back to Jackson."
"Exactly, we could just as easily be killed by infected couldn't we?" Rich nodded at her not comprehending her meaning.
For the next twenty minutes Rich talked Ellie's ear off, she would briefly nod at him or say 'I'm listening ' but the only thing on her mind was getting away from him.
For a moment she even thought it would be good if a clicker got him just so she could make the getaway easy. She shook the thought away, she was better than this, or at least she thought she was. Maybe she wasn't, but she was trying so hard to be. If the fight at Santa Barbara had taught her anything it was that she wasn't beyond redemption, she had to cling onto that, it was all she had left of Joel.