Lost without you ~ Freya Ridings

   *Ember's POV*

   I'm Ember Rose star, I'm 17. I live with my loving family, my Mom, Sarah Bethany Star. My Dad, Steve Allen Star and my Brother, Dustin Wade Star. We all get a long great and my life has always been kinda perfect, well it used to be. This is my story

  

     I sat on the couch in my room clutching my stomach in pain as cramps took over. "MOM DO WE HAVE ANY ADVIL!"

     A minute or so later, my mom silently walked into my room with a couple tablets of advil and a cup of water. "Here you go sweety" she smiled at me, a pity smile. Even though it's just a cramp, my mom can't stand seeing anyone in my family hurting. "Thanks mom".

   "Everyone else is hungry, we're gonna run and get Chili's do you want to stay back?" she asked and I nodded. "I'm not really hungry right now, can you pick me up some nachos for later though?"

    I followed my mom out of my room to go grab some water, as my family was leaving. "bye Em, I love you" my mom called out as she walked out. "I love guys too, have a good dinner!" I yelled back and she smiled

   After they pulled out of the driveway, I went back up to my room and turned on my laptop. I opened up Netflix and stared at the suggestions like I was going to watch something else than shameless. After about 30 seconds of scrolling, I clicked shameless and waited to see Carl Gallagher.

      Let me just say Ethan Cutkosky is hot, hot and everyone that doesn't know who he is, is seriously missing out.

  I felt my eyes droop and shut off my laptop and turned on my spotify playlist. There isn't a reason why I always fall asleep to music, I just like to.

***

  It's around 10 pm and my family still isn't home. I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous, but i'm sure they just just went to see a movie or something and forgot to contact me.

  I decide to text my best friend to get my mind off the worry.

  Me.
   I was cramping so I stayed home from getting dinner with my family. now I think they left me for a movie :((

  Carl. (Jade Madison)
   haha
   serves you right ;)

  Me.
   you're a meanie, you know that

  Carl. (Jade Madison)
    so i've been told

   Me.
    I don't really have the will to be awake.
    I think i'm gonna take a bath, then watch shameless till I pass out

  Carl. (Jade Madison)
    Okay, goodnight

  Me.
   goodnight babe :)

    I smile down at my screen for another 10 seconds or so, you know, like the creep I am.

    Heading over to my bathroom, I turn the water on and put some bubble bath in it. I turn on my spotify playlist, then ease myself into the water.

   I just sit there not wanting to move, just enjoying the way the hot water always feels. I have problems with overheating and passing out so I stopped trying to take showers at the risk of falling while fainting and hitting my head.

  I start to shampoo and condition my mid-length brown hair and then shave my legs. I'm terrible at shaving so I have razor burn and a couple cuts but i couldnt care less.

  I step out of the shower, put on some rose sented lotion. towel dry my hair, brush my teeth and throw on my pajama pants and plain tshirt.

  Hearing my phone ring I expect it to be Jade or Aspen.

   "Hello, is this Ember Star?" the voice asks and I feel my heart sink as I hear the sorrow in his voice "ye- yes, thats me" I say my voice wavering some

  "I'm very sorry to imform you that your family was hit head on my a drunk driver and no one survived the impact." he explains and i freeze. I don't feel anything, I just stare into my wall praying for this to be some crazy nightmare

   "w-what" I barely choke out, starting to see my vision blur. "I'm so sorry dear, call me if you need anything" he says and I hear the beep signaling, he hung up.
         What I need is for this to be a sick joke

  I'm still completely frozen. You would have thought i'd be in a pool of my own tears already, but all I feel is this void. Finding where my phone had landed when it dropped out of my hand I immediatly call Jade, Praying shes awake

   "hello" her cheery voice rings through the phone, "I thought you'd be asleep by now" she says and when I don't respond she replies again. "Hello, Em, is everything ok over there?"

   Finally gaining the corage to say anything I barely muster out "c-can I please come o-over, please" only adding to Jades confusion "Uhh yeah of course, i'll leave the door unlocked for you" she says and I hang up saying nothing more

  I rush to my car, eager to get out of my house and drive over to Jade's.

   As soon as I arrive I run into the house and up to her room. As soon as I see her I tackle her into a hug and feel all of my emotions come at once.

   She walks back onto her bed still in the hug and I cry into her shoulder for I don't know how long. Jade whispers soothing things to me but never once questions what had happened.

   When I had finally calmed down enough to breath, I knew I had to tell her what was going on.

   "I-I had j-just gotten out o-of the bath a-and" I sniffle "my p-phone had rang. I-I fig-figured you had cal-called me so I pi-picked it up" I shut my eyes tightly, desperately trying to muster out the last few words. "An of-officer had called me to s-say t-that my "f-f-family died i-in a car crash on th-the way to di-dinner" I tell her my voice cracking

    "Oh my God, Ember! I'm so sorry" she says stunned. Making all the tears come rushing back again

   "I-I don't know what to do, or w-where I'm gonna go.  I-I don't know how I'm g-gonna survive w-without them"

    "I-if they had just st-stayed home, n-none of this would have happened"

   "I-if I had just been th-there too, I w-wouldn't feel like this!" I wail

    "No!" Jade shouts at me. "I love you and I can't even imagine what pain you're feeling  but you can't think like that" her voice cracking by the end. I look up and see her glossy eyes. Making me feel just that much worse, for upsetting her "I really do love you Em, I don't want you to think about what would've happened in that car" she tells me and I nod.

    "C-can we just watch shameless" I ask quietly and her lips turn up slightly "of course"

   As we lay in her bed watching the Gallaghers go through a ton of shit. I start to feel my eyes droop until I fall asleep.

   ***
This was chapter one of "lost without you".
Feel free to correct me on any spelling mistakes or incorrect grammar
 

   

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