Chapter 30
I never wanted to keep anything from my friends. Ayokong bigyan sila ng rason para isipin nilang wala akong tiwala sa kanila. Sasabihin ko naman sa kanila. I was just trying to gather all my courage before doing so.
There was something on Lio's face, like he's trying to dig something.
"Hope..."
"Lio, actually-"
"Are you together?" Putol niya sa sasabihin ko. Saglit akong yumuko to take a deep beath.
He already caught me. What's the use of denying it?
"Y-yes."
"Hope, diba bawal 'yon?" He asked. Para siyang hindi makapaniwalang we're really together, that I ignored whatever rule there is about a relationship between an instructor and a student.
"That's why I couldn't tell you."
"Does Clarisse know? How about your sisters?"
"Walang ibang may alam."
Lio stared at me.
"I'm sorry," I said in a low voice. I feel so bad that he has to discover it this way. And seeing his reaction right now just gave me the idea how my sisters and Clarisse would react at me for not telling them. Baka nga mas malala pa.
"I can't believe I almost..." Lio took a heavy sigh.
"What?"
He shook his head. "Are you sure about that? Hope, he might just be using you."
"Why would he do that?"
"I don't know. Bakit ikaw? There are a lot of other girls in the University."
"Why not me?"
Lio couldn't reply and my eyes began to water. Alam kong may kasalanan ako sa kanila, that I hid something so important from them. But when he asked why me, nasaktan ako. Kasi bakit nga ba ako?
Para niyang tinatanong kung bakit ako ang pinili, kung bakit ako ang ginusto. Am I that bad?
"Hey..."
"Hindi ko rin alam kung bakit ako Lio," I murmured. I looked at him straight in the eyes. "Is love supposed to be so choosy? Don't I deserve to be chosen?"
"That's not what I meant."
"I'm really sorry I hid it from you. Sasabihin ko naman eh. Nag-iipon lang ako ng lakas ng loob. Because I feel like you won't be supportive."
"Hope..."
"Do I look that bad just because I love him?" I asked. Parang natigilan si Lio. His face showed how shocked he was earlier. But he looked more taken aback now.
"You love him?" He asked. Mahina lang 'yong pagkakatanong niya, but I heard it. So I slowly nodded. "Does he feel the same way?"
I just stared at him.
"I don't know what to say," he mumbled. Sumandal siya sa upuan niya and stared at me intently. May sasabihin pa sana siya pero dumating na iyong order namin.
The two of us didn't talk while the crew was serving our food. Hindi ko rin alam kung anong sasabihin. It was so awkward. I was never prepared for this.
Nang makaalis ang crew ay pareho kaming hindi agad kumilos and just looked at the food. Gutom na 'ko but I couldn't bring myself to begin eating, not when Lio is still looking so lost.
I heard him stifle a sigh as he moved his chair even closer to the table. "I'm happy for you, Hope. As long as you're happy. But if he hurt you, or if that relationship will cause something bad, kahit na Instructor siya, I'll kick him in the ass."
