traitor

030 | yours truly

i walked out of third period for lunch, i put on my earphones and walked to my locker putting away my textbooks.

i grabbed my phone out of the front pocket of my backpack and walked down the hallway to the cafeteria. my head was down focused on my phone angry texting jeongwoo because he needed help on the homework again, i'm gonna kill him he's so irritating.

i bumped my head into someone, "oh i'm so sorry" i said backing up. i saw haruto look back down at me, i quickly turned around and walked the other direction.

"sora" haruto called out. i ignored him and walked a little quicker. "sora!" he repeated. i stopped, i looked around and some students around me were staring at me waiting for me to answer him.

i turned around and looked at haruto. he walked up closer to me, "i just want to explain, you don't need to say anything, please."

i took a deep breath, "fine" i replied.

"i didn't know who that girl was that night, i was trying to find you. she tried to kiss me and i was trying to leave. i really didn't even know who she was. it's a misunderstanding, please believe me" he whispered the last words.

i looked down, i was somewhat relieved? i didn't want to be mad at him anymore, but now what? i realized what was the point of this whole misunderstanding?

"okay... thanks." i replied, i turned back around and walked away.

i felt his arms wrapped around me from behind. the warmth of his body touched mine and i could smell the same cologne from that night.

i looked up seeing the students walking around us has stopped and was now whispering and pointing secretly.

especially since it was him.

and his arms,

were wrapped around me.

"haruto let go people are watching us" i whispered attempting to pull his hands away. but he didn't move.

he put his hands on my shoulder and turned me around, "sora you never leave my mind, you make me smile... all the time. it's been so long since i've been happy.. i like you. i don't want to hide it from you. and it's ok if you don't like me back. but i just wanted to tell you. im sorry. i don't want to ruin anything between us. i fell for the way you smile, the way you look at me with your pretty eyes, how you care about me more than i do for myself. im sorry, i shouldn't have-" i cut him off.

he looked at me like he always have, eyes full of affection and purity that i've never been able to noticed. i smiled. i've always looked at him as a friend, until i realized i liked him too.

"i like you"

the only thing that could come out of my mouth, the only thing that i should've said.

but i regretted one thing, that i haven't noticed it sooner.

he pulled me in and hugged me, i looked around and everyone was just watching us, their stares cut through me. in disgust from girls who admired him, and in disgust from people who hated me for being close with my brother and his members.

but in that moment it didn't bother me, for the first time, their attention didn't bother me.

-

later that night i jumped into bed after finishing dinner with mashiho, jeongwoo, and jihoon. i laid down and stared at the ceiling.

i couldn't stop smiling, even jeongwoo noticed and made fun of me, jerk face. i got a text from jay, "hey thanks for the other day,"

i turned off my phone and rolled back over, i wouldn't see him anymore right? or at least anytime soon. i've tried everything to ignore and forget about it. i took sunghoon to jays place after and haven't talked to him since. it bothers me just thinking about it.

i heard a knock on my door, "yes?" i sat up. yoshi walked in, "can we talk?" he closed the door gently. he sat on my bed, "so you and-" he began.

i looked at my lap, "haruto" i mumbled. he nodded, "everyone at school is talking about you two. whats going on?" he asked.

yoshi always had a soft voice and a gently heart. he would never hurt anyone or say anything to make someone feel worst about themselves.

i was afraid to even look him in the eyes, but he had the right to know. i hesitated, "i like him, but i will stop talking to him if you want me to. you are the most important to me. i'm sorry, i should've told you earlier i was just afraid you'll be mad at me or at haruto" i mumbled.

he put his hand over mine, he looked at the bracelet and back at me. "sora... i'm okay with it. you seem happy and so does ruto. i bet mom and dad is happy that you are. it's been awhile." he smiled.

i couldn't help but hug him, i havent had a meaningful conversation with yoshi in a while. he hugged me and patted my back, i pulled away. he was smiling but i saw tears on his face.

i realized that he had so much going on as a trainee right now and mom and dad being gone i forgot that he actually was going through this alone when i left.

"why are you crying?" tears started to well up i scoffed. i wiped his face with my sleeve, i heard a pound on my door. i got up and opened it and the whole dorm fell down on my bedroom floor.

i stared at them and they stared back at me. they all had an awkward smile plastered on their faces, jeongwoo who was on top of the pile quickly got up and put a thumbs up, "congrats sora!" and went in for a hug.

i heard yoshi laughing in the back. i pushed him off, "were you guys eavesdropping on us" i paused watching one by one of them get up.

hyunsuk, jihoon, jeongwoo, and mashiho looked at each other and smiled. they all went in and hugged me, "what are you doing, stop!" i said trying to push them off.

"turns out the boyfriend was our very own haruto" jihoon grinned.