Blended Souls

twelve.

Charlie Mccoy

 We been pull up to this spot, ducked off about an hour away from home. A beautiful mountain view casted over a large body of water, i  could see a path that wrapped around.. Placing my hand on the door handle I took a  second before getting out.

" Wait uhh..before we get out I just need to say something" letting the door go I turn completely in my seat to look at him, leaning with his back to the door I knew Eric was studying me behind those dark shades. When we get out of this car I was  taking a leap of faith, I just hoped he was still here to catch me. 

" I feeling you... likea lot. I have for some time now but I wont allow myself to act on it, I just.. Eric your an amazing man and I just yea." quickly opening the door I jumped out the car, stupid stupid just why did i just do that. I wish I could kick my own ass, hearing his car down open I stood still.

" Uhh yea can we just... walk and I promise Ill tell you everything you want to know" I wanted to ignore how I embarrassed myself just know, there was so much that needed to be said, We began down the path kicking rocks beneath my feet, taking a deep breath remembering the many time Eric said I could trust him. 

" Emani and Kassidy... they.. arent my daughters" I dropped the bomb, he stopped walking, body stiff staring me down with an unreadable expression. He took a deep breath before putting some space between us, as we started walking I could feel the tension getting thicker that just made me even more scared.

" The beginning" his voice was sharp, damn this was a new side to him and I didnt like it one bit. I got so used to having Eric love on me, this shit had me about to cry. I had to take a couple breaths just to get myself together.

" I came home from work one day and there was a 4 year old little girl playing with a huge dollhouse in my living room, when she noticed me walk through the door her face lit up like a christmas tree, Mommy she called out over and over but I couldn't even answer her.I had never seen this child a day in my life yet my mind was stuck on the young girls face, before I could even open my mouth Justin came walking out the kitchen his face clear of all emotion

" Look my mommy finally home, Mommy look at our new house its so big and I finally got my own room and its got lots of toys and clothes." she jumped up and down in excitement, i could barely stand as i became light headed and dizzy,

" Yeah just play over there and let me talk to your mom okay" when he said that i scrunched up my face in confusion, when he looked at my he had that same look in his eyes whenever he was pissed off with me. Fixing my face I walked into the room as he closed the door behind me,I headed straight to my bathroom turning on the water splashing some on my face. My head yanked back in full force. I thought it was about to snap straight off my body. Seeing Justin behind me with a fist full of my hair practically rippin my scalp out, the fear he installed in me on clear display.

" That there is your 4 year old daughter Emani. Understand" he said the shit with ease as if he was just simply asking what was for dinner, I was in shock head throbbing full of pain

But wh-" I couldn't even get 2 words out before he smashed my head into the mirror, luckily for me it didn't shatter but it did leave a bloody gash.  I answered his ass so fast that I understood, sadly none of his actions were a surprise anymore .Deep down I knew where this little girl came from, but I also knew to never question anything Justin said or did that was a lesson I had to learn the hard way. As time went on she all but confirmed it, it was like everytime i did something that seemed odd to her or I would say things and she'd tell me how i was talking weird. I'm talking about something as simple as the way my food tasted or even how I dressed. The fact that I had a job  was such a shock to her it was crazy. Still I never had it in me to actually ask that one question,  I raised Emani from that day forwarded as my daughter. I tried to do everything right for her, she didn't deserve anything else but unconditional love. Of course behind closed doors I was living in such a dark and defeated place but I refused to reflect that on her, I did it all for a child who No i didn't birth but she was every bit of me.Then one day Im working from home while Mani is at school which is something I rarely ever did, i decide to go out and get groceries before she came home. I grab my stuff and get ready to leave but when I walk outside there is a pink car seat on my steps, in my mind I prayed over and over like please lord not again. A blanket covers what lays inside, a single postcard placed on top. Lifting the cover my heart melts at this adorable newborn baby girl sleeping, she was only 2 weeks old so tiny. Flipping over the card I started to cry, the beautiful cursive handwriting I knew all too well. Once I saw that one word written on the card, Butterflies, that's when I knew without a doubt Both Emani and Kassidy were my sisters' children. Before the car accident my dad would take Karlie and I every Sunday after church to this huge field not too far from our house, soon as he parked the car we would jump out and run freely. The best part was when all these beautiful butterflies of all different colors would surround wherever we ran, my dad said our mother loved to come here while she was pregnant and wanted the two of us to feel some type of connection to her" Looking into his eyes I sighed deeply.

" Eric I have a twin sister, her name is Karlie and I haven't seen her since we were 17 years old. One day she just left the house and never returned, just like they told us my mother did when we were only 3 years old.Both of them left their children behind for someone else to raise. Me. I'm that someone!!  I've been looking out for Karlie ever since I was a little girl, it only got worse after my father and older brothers were killed in a car accident, We lived in group homes  where I got my ass beat on for trying to protect her. I got us out of that situation, put my life on the line for the both of us, do you know that I stole a huge amount of money from our last group home so we could run away. Nothing I did mattered since she just walked away, my twin, the person I literally came into this world with turned her back on me. I had no idea where she went  or how to find her, I didn't even have a clue how Jason knew who she was and somehow connected to her. Everyday I tried to figure out how someone could walk away from their only family, the only family they had  and don't at least try to keep contact. But then you find ways to just drop your children into their lives, like did she even have any idea what I was living with or did she just not care? What was her life like that she felt like she wasn't in a position to care for them? Was she safe? I had so many questions and no answers that eventually I gave up, I convinced myself it didn't matter why she left me , it didn't matter where she disappeared too. All that mattered was the girls, I was grateful she left them because they are mine, a part of me.Today when I lost it back at  the house, it was because Boog mentioned red nails and all I could think about was my sister. Red nails were always Karlie's signature color, ever since I could remember she would never get any other color.To know that someone so selfish was able to just pop up and take my baby..." wiping my tears I couldn't help but think what if Karlie just took Kassidy away from me. Eric pulls me tightly close to his chest, it was silent between the two of us. I had no idea what I was going to do, the only thing I knew for sure was that something had to change. There was no way i could allow anyway to randomly just pop into our relives, especially when their intentions are unclear.

Destiny

When my brother and Charlie left to talk I made Chase explain everything to me, I needed to know what had him so angry it caused him to act the way he did. All the information he laid on the table had my head spinning, of course some of the things he told me I had some knowledge about  since Charlie told me but a twin? No that was something I wasn't ready for, I also wasn't sold on the story of why she was being looked for. When they  got back we all sat down and discussed everything, to know that my friend went through wat more then she first let on hurt me. I also saw her in a new light, Charlie was alot stronger then she gave herself credit for.

" No No, there is no way that's true! When my father died we had a social worker who actually bent over backwards trying to find other family members but there was no one." Charlie paced back and forth pulling at her hair, my good sis was stressed out.

" What I'a dont understand is if she wanted to find you for that sole reason then why go to the school and take Tootie out to lunch and then bring her back, I mean she knew where to find her which means she has some type of idea on how to find you" Chase asked while going through all the papers his people sent over, for once I was thankful he had Damien as a real friend.

" Nah what I need tah kno is HOW she found tootie school" Eric spoke up, that was a good question because according to Damien he never gave her any information, he came straight to Chase when something felt off. Eric pulled Charlie between his legs huggin her waist, Chase side eyed me and all I could do was shrug. We both tried to play it off as if we were looking through stuff  trying to figure out our next step, when really we were actually watching the interaction between those two. I've been trying for months to get Cee to hook up with my brother but she just wasnt feeling it so i wonder what changed, but then again its alot going on and my brother has always been good at calming people in stressful situations.