WARNING: Contains depression and anxiety issues. Please, if you're not comfortable with these kind of stuffs, please skip this part immediately.
Y/N'S POINT OF VIEW
"She looked like a slut."
"Looked? She is a slut!"
"How come Yuno fell in love with someone like her?"
"She's just good at academics, she's not even pretty."
"I bet Yuno's just after her intelligence. He doesn't really love Y/N."
I choked on my saliva, tears streaming like an opened faucet from my eyes. That's it, I'm so fed up with them. I can't take those harsh words anymore! Did I do something bad at them?! Is it my fault that Yuno fell in love with me?
Tripping on my own feet, my books scattered on the ground and my eyeglasses almost fell off my face. Quickly gathering my pieces of stuff, I hurriedly ran out of my school, locking myself in my dormitory. Yuno's been calling my phone almost twenty times already but I don't bother answering any of them. I love him so much, so bad. But I don't want him to get mixed up with the mess I'm in. He's an athlete, an outstanding student, and I don't want to ruin his reputation.
Throwing my books on my bed, I slowly made my way to the bathroom. I stared at my face. What's wrong with having acne? Freckles? Is it my fault that I was born with poor eyesight? I'm not that slim and fit but I can run within the whole oval on the field. I'm just intelligent. I'm not pretty. Will I look better if my hair is shorter? Will those girls stop bullying me, pulling dangerous pranks at me if I cut my hair? If they saw that I looked better without bangs on my face?
Why am I even adjusting for them?
My eyes landed on a pair of scissors beside me, shaky hands grabbing it. Looking myself from the mirror, I closed my eyes before slowly, sourly, cutting my hair as strands fell on the white tiled flooring. I don't want Yuno to leave me. I want to be pretty for him, I want to be the best for him. I bet I cannot take it when he breaks up with me.
As I cut another handful, I heard someone banging on my door. Hell, I'm not even done with my hair. The mirror reflected my face as I saw how messed up I am. I looked worse. If those girls see me again, they might pull me again and lock me inside the locker room for one whole day. Thank goodness that when the first time they did it, the janitor heard me crying inside and finally letting me free. Those cheerleaders did it so they can spend time with my boyfriend and Yuno was like worried meat when he saw me. He was so furious. It's like a beast wanting revenge or something.
The banging continued.
I slammed my fists on the sink, letting the scissors go off my hand before slowly walking to the door.
"W-Who is—"
"Y/N, open this goddamn door right now!" It was Yuno.
My shaky hands touched the doorknob before slowly turning it. I peeked through the door but Yuno was strong enough to push it with me.
"Y/N, why aren't you—"
He saw my hair. He saw how messy my room is. He saw me in my worst state. Is he going to leave me?
"What happened to you?!"
Yuno rushed to my side, giving me a very tight hug as I cried on his shoulders. He patted my head before his slender fingers traced my hair. My cries turned louder as he placed me on my bed, touching my cheek to wipe my tears afterward.
"Did, did you do this to yourself?!" He said, trying to control his voice.
I nodded. "B-But why?"
"I...I think I might be prettier on short hair. I think that maybe those girls might stop picking pranks on me. I think that you won't leave me if I became more beautiful than before. I just want to be the best for you, Yuno."
My voice is so soft while my boyfriend's eyes grew bigger.
"You thought I'm going to leave you because you're not pretty?" I shyly nodded.
"What the hell?! Y/N, I will never do that!"
"But what if you do?! What if you suddenly change your mind? I can't take it, Yuno! P-Please—"
"Y/N, look at me, look at me," He forcibly raised my chin so our eyes met. His stare is so soft, so sincere and convincing. It made my heart melt, it made me calmer. His touch is very light as his skin brushed against my skin. Miraculously, it made my cries stop for a while. His stare pierced me as if it was looking directly at my soul.
"I will never leave you..."
"B-But—"
He put his index finger on my lips as he inched his face nearer to mine.
"Believe me when I say I love you. Don't you dare listen to those sluts, and instead, listen to yourself. Y/N, you're beautiful. Physically or not, you are very pretty. You're magnificent and unique. It feels like I don't deserve you, you deserve someone better than me yet you still don't leave me. I should be the one worrying about you breaking up with me."
"I will not break up with you, Yuno!"
"I know," he smiled. "That's why I'm so thankful for you. That's why I'm so lucky for having you in my life."
My thoughts stopped running inside my mind. My heart stopped breathing and as well as my breathing. It's like the world stopped moving as I tried to process his words. He said he won't leave me. He said he loves me. He said he's lucky because he got me. After all, I'm in his life.
"I love you so much."
"I love you too, Yuno!"
Tears streamed down my face as I hugged him very tightly. Very, very tight. He kissed the side of my head as I felt safer, secured. I don't want to let go. I'll just believe him and listen to myself. I may not look pretty, but at least I have someone who loves me genuinely and I'm contented with that. Yuno accepted me for who I am and that's okay with me.
"Now," he softly spoke again, smiling cutely with his dimples appearing on his fluffy cheeks.
"Let me fix your hair for you, okay?"
I smiled before nodding like a child. "Yes!"
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