mcyt +friends oneshots

< please eat- t×c///01 >

///just a fuckin vent hurt/comfort fic with
little to no comfort that's all about
eating disorders, so please read
at your own risk\\\

///dialogue? overrated. lol but seriously,
one of my favorite things to do is try to
see how far i can get into whatever
i'm writing without using dialogue
& i love it, you can do so much
without dialogue & to me at
least i just flow better
without it\\\

-please eat///(light)travis×cooper
chapt. 01/01

(intense trigger warning)

         i watch silently, taking short & quick glances that are far apart, making sure travis is at least somewhat okay while eating our dinner. i decide to ignore his leg bouncing quickly under the table or that hes playing with his food for a long time inbetween bites, wanting to fight more important battles like making sure he at least eats something & keeps most of it down before we tackle the smaller things that he's probably not even aware he's doing at this point.

         the dinner is simple enough, since it's just me & travis right now in the house, noah is in the east coast visting his girlfriend & carson has moved out awhile ago so it's easier for us to cook homemade meals, so we decided on tacos.

         we make eye contact & he smiles at me forcefully, i smile back & reach out a hand on the table silently asking if he want to hold it. his smile turns just a little bit less forced & he sets his soft hand gently in mine, i squeeze it a little.

         when i've ate my full i get up to take my plate to the sink travis hands me his, i know that he's only ate maybe 3 small tacos but the look in his eyes tells me that's all he can mentally handle right now & i don't want to push him to his limit. i take his plate, no questions asked & start cleaning the dishes. travis stays with me scrolling through his phone, knowing it's both safer & better for him if he does.

         we decide to play mario cart, me winning most of them like always much to travis's dismay. after i win again travis says he need to go to the bathroom. i spend awhile scrolling through twitter before i decide to go check on him & to go into my room to grab the bong & weed.

         as i'm walking down the hallway past the bathroom i hear a sound i was hoping to not hear; the faint sounds of travis throwing up, or at least trying to. fuck, i knock gently on the door,

         "travis?" i ask softly, "are you okay?" i place my ear on it hoping to hear something, anything. the toilet flushes, the sink runs for awhile then, & the door opens to an even paler & tired looking travis,

         "ye-eah, yea-h i'm- i'm fine." he smiles weakly & trys to push past me but i grab his arm & as gentaly as i can force him to stop. i look at him trying to make eye contact but he won't,

         "travis" i softly still looking at him, he bites his lip,

         "i- i-... i'm sorry," he says so softly & sadly i barely hear him but i shake my head even though i know he won't see me,

         "you have nothing to be sorry for, sure this sucks but you can't expect to be cured of this trav." i say seriously looking into those deep hazel eyes of his. "look...let's just put some water in you okay? then we can sleep, we both need it." he nods his head a little & follows close behind me to the kitchen.

         once we reach the kitchen he sits on the counter & i go & fill a cup of water for him, hand it to him, then sit next to him as he slowly drinks it. he pauses a little & at me, i meet his eyes & it's like i can see the gears turning in his mind,

         "i think....this is a dumb question right?" he looks at me a little & i shrug not knowing what he's gonna ask me  "do i deserve to eat? like i feel like don't, don't deserve it..." he wraps his arms around himself & look down at his feet, "i feel like when i eat i should punish myself- throw up & i- i just- i feel like i do deserve that." he looks at me, his big hazel eyes now filled with tears, "i- i don't tho-ugh?" his voice breaking while looking at me sadness & confusion wrapped around those words, his mind,

         "you should never punish yourself for something like eating, you deserve that food & you definitely don't deserve to throw it up." i say as i place a hand on his thigh, "i- we- love you- everyone does, you don't deserve to punish yourself." i finish & then watch as he bites his lip, he nods his head & places a gental hand over my own,

         "are you sure?" he asks quietly, not believing me. i nod my head a little,

         "dude." i say meeting his eyes & saying 100 seriously, "i'd never lie about this." i say & place my other hand on his cheek moving the tears away, "you matter to me." i whisper quietly, a light pink spreading over my cheeks & a slightly redder tone wasbes along his, i know he heard me as i watch his eyes widen,

         "thank you coopie," he whispers "i- i'm gonna sleep," he says then hope off the table, i watch as he turns towards me, "can- could- i don't- don't wanna sleep alone..." he says mostly to the ground. i smile a little then get off the counter,

          "of course trav." i say then blush as he grabs my hand & leads me to his room.

         we end up in travis's bed, me in my boxers & him wearing a tshirt & shorts, we are faced towards each other. even though i sleep easily it takes me while to sleep so i end up just peacefully watching travis as he dose, how relaxed he looks in his dreamland, how pretty he looks, how happy he seems.

         & that's the last thing I think about before i drift; how better he seems when you turn off that brain, that wonderful, crazy brain.

///i've been thinking about maybe doing
soulmate one shots, if i was to does
anyone have requests? a ship or a
fav soulmate au you'd want me
to write? you can respond
here if you want with
an idea\\\

///lowercase intentional\\\
///words- 1090\\\