Dear Diary

Lorazepam

Since a long time Heiko has struggled with bad dreams. Making him not able to sleep properly, or even avoiding sleep. After weeks of just accepting this, he decided it was time to get help. He made a appointment at the doctor, who send him to a sleep observatory.

~ few weeks later ~

Heiko heard his phone ringing and rushed to pick up the phone. He saw on the display that it was an anonymous number. He already knew who was calling, since he had a appointment with the sleep observatory and doctors and health companies always call with anonymous numbers. He picked up the phone. "Heiko Hiersche" he said while he looked for pen and paper to make some notations if he had questions. "hello, This is Elena from the sleep observatory." he heard from the other side.

He took a deep breath and listened to what she had to say. "I am calling to do an intake interview and to explain how the procedure will go, Feel free to ask questions anytime!" Heiko mumbled agreeing. Elena continued asking him questions about his sleep habits, about his dreams and about what he feels when he wakes up. After that she explains Heiko the procedure of the sleep observation. Heiko listened carefully and scribbled some things on the paper. He heard Richi walking in the room. He waved at Richi who now stood behind him reading over his shoulder. Richi then walked to the kitchen making two cups of tea and carrying them toward the table where Heiko was sitting. He put them on the table, Taking one cup for himself and sitting down next to Heiko. Richi noticed how tired Heiko looked now. He gave a wink when he looked over. Heiko smiled at him and then went back to scribbling on the paper. Richi looked at it but couldn't make out any of it. He thought to himself: You really need to write more clearer Heiko..
Richi now took a little sip of his tea which was still too hot to drink.

After a few minutes Heiko ended the call. He sighted and put the phone on the table. Leaning backwards covering his face with his hands, while making growling sounds. "That sounds like you are very excited." said Richi as he took another sip. "I am just nervous for all of this.." "that is oke.. When is your appointment?" "Next week.." "Oh, Thats quick!" "That's why I am nervous!" said Heiko a bit annoyed. He noticed Richi raising his eyebrows at him. "I'm sorry.. " "It's oke." "so.. What did she tell you?" "way too much" said Heiko with a nervous laugh. "Well.. Start at the beginning" Said Richi as he stood up, grabbed the cup of tea and handed it to Heiko. Heiko took it and held it in his hands like he was feeling extremely cold. "are you cold?" "A little." Richi got up and grabbed a blanket which was laying on the chair. He put it around Heiko his shoulders. "oke.. So, Start at the beginning." Heiko took a sip of the tea which burned his throat. He didn't really mind it, it took away the nervous feeling for a few seconds. Then he took a sight and started explaining.

When he was done explaining, Richi looked at him as if he was thinking of what to answer to it all. Then he said: "That doesn't sound too bad.. You had worse things happen."
"I know. But I am scared for what they will find in my mind. My mind is a dark place where nobody should enter.."
"Sounds like a big adventure. Maybe that's what they are looking for!" said Richi with a smile.
"Shut up.. That's not funny."
"I am just teasing you."
"will you go on your own? or do you want me to come with you?"
"I'm not sure.. It will be very boring since I am supposed to be sleeping most of the time.."
"It's up to you.. I don't mind to come with you."
"Mhm.." Said Heiko as he got up, put his cup of tea on the table and walked into the hallway.
"Well.. BYEE!" Said Richi.
"I need to pee. Calm down! I will come back.." 
Richi laughed. "Okay. Accepted for this time."

~A week later ~

Heiko his alarm went off. He took his phone and turned it off. He hadn't slept the whole evening. He had been too nervous and he had too many bad dreams. Richi opened his eyes. It was 6:00. "Don't you want to try to sleep some?" Asked Richi. "No. I'm good." Said Heiko as he got out of bed. He put on a sweater and walked to the bathroom. Richi rolled his eyes and fell back asleep.