✨JJBA ONESHOTS✨

Yandere!Funny Valentine x reader

You watched as the so-called President glare at you, he was upset for being rejected by you, it made you feel disgusted, he had shown so little emotion to his wife's death and now he wanted you to be his lover? All he truly cared about was that rotten corpse, or so you thought.

You were working for him, you would write up the progress and helped him to keep track of the race and delivered messages to him about the corpse parts. But after his confession of love to you, you had decided to quit, and you told him this, which was turning out to be a giant mistake.

You turned to leave, not caring how he glared at you. "You say, the price of my love's not a price that you're willing to pay," you turned to look at him as he started to speak to you. "You cry, in your tea which you hurl in the sea when you see me go by," he said as he looked at you with pity, "why so sad?"

You scoffed at him, whatever he was thinking he had truly lost his mind. "Remember we made an arrangement when you went away, now you're making me mad," you heard the anger in his voice as he watched you reach for the doorknob, "remember, despite our estrangement, I'm your man," he said in a sweet town which made you sick, you opened the door as you started your journey to get out of this wicked building.

"You'll be back, soon you'll see, you'll remember you belong to me, you'll be back, time will tell, you'll remember that I served you well," he sang as he followed after you, "oceans rise, empires fall!" He shouted as he knocked down silverware of the table, you turned to look at him with concern, "we have seen each other through it all and when push comes to shove," he said as he smiled at you lovingly. "I will send a fully armed battalion to remind you of my love!" He sang with a wicked smile, you needed to get out of here.

'Da da da dat da, dat da da da da ya da, Da da dat dat da ya da! Da da da dat da, dat da da da da ya da,Da da dat dat da-'

You could hear him sing as you made your way into one of the office rooms that would lead into the dining hall, you watched in horror as he had somehow already gotten into the room first, he laid on the office desk as he posed dramatically, holding one of his hands to his forehead, "You say our love is draining and you can't go on, you'll be the one complaining when I am gone." He sang as he glanced at you with that creepy stare of his.

You decided to get into the hall, did this building have secret passages? You found a staircase and decided to go down it, perhaps there would be an exit somewhere, who even built such a maze of a building? "And no, don't change the subject! 'cause you're my favorite subject," you turned to look in pure horror as Valentine stood on top of the stairs now, "my sweet, submissive subject, my loyal, royal subject, forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, and ever," he sang as he slid down one of the staircase rails.

"You'll be back like before I will fight the fight and win the war, for your love, for your praise and I'll love you 'til my dying days!" He sang as he followed after you, he was utterly insane. "When you're gone, I'll go mad, so don't throw away this thing we had," he had managed to catch up to you as he pinned you to one of the walls, you watched him in pure horror as he leaned in. "'Cause when push comes to shove, I will kill your friends and family to remind you of my love," he smiled sweetly at you as he let go of you, it was like a sick game of cat and mice.

'Da da da dat da, dat da da da da ya da, Da da dat dat da ya da! Da da da dat da, dat da da da da ya da Da da dat-'

You opened the door as your expression turned into pure horror now, the entire dining hall was full of Valentines. "Everybody!" the Valentine behind you shouted as he pushed you into the room, you watched as the men started to sing along with him, what in the lord's name was going on, what was this witchcraft? Were you in hell?

'Da da da dat da, dat da da da da ya da, Da da dat dat da ya da!'

You heard them sing as you ran towards the exit, not even thinking twice as you reached for the doorknob.

'Da da da dat da, dat da da da da ya da, da da da, Dat dat da ya da!'

You slammed the door behind you as Valentine watched you along with the other Valentines, a sinister smile appeared on his lips, you'd be back in his arms, he was sure of that.