Thin Air (Complete EDITING)

21- Brandon

Brandon June 28-30, 2020

"I heard she went missing that same day that BigFoot Festival was going on. I bet Sasquatch snatched her up. Or maybe even one of those crazy groupies!"

Oh, good Lord, this town is full of nutjobs. No wonder I don't leave my house more than I need to.

"I bet her husband did it. It's ALWAYS the husband."

Except her husband was incapacitated at the time and is now my brother-in-law. He is the most gentle people I know. Seth ever hurting Erin is laughable.

I continue scrolling through the less than helpful posts. Social media is full of idiots.

This next one is one I've read a thousand variations of.

"My mom went to high school with her, and she said that weird loner kid was seen driving through the woods that night. Like lights off, out in the boonies. Plus, he was totally obsessed with her. My money is on him."

Okay, A) that was Drew and Jamie out in the woods in my truck, and B) I was not obsessed with Erin; she was my friend. Period. These people need to let that one go. It's weird that people cannot get their heads around a man and woman having a friendship.

It's been 18 years today since I watched her walk away. I was hoping that by chance, someone out there would have something helpful to say. No such luck. It's all the usual bullshit on Facebook.

My head is pounding when I finally decide to step away from the computer for the night. Ol' Knucklehead and I watch a little tv before he falls asleep, leaving me to get lost in my own thoughts again.

The night Erin went missing plays through my mind like a movie I hate but can't unsee.

                  _________________________________

"Hey, you, ready to go?" I poke her in the ribs with my elbow, hoping to see her cheer up. I hate to see her so down.

"Yeah, but you don't need to walk me home, Brandon." The frown that wrinkles her brow breaks my heart a little. Over the last year, or so we had become close, and I miss the carefree aura that usually surrounds her.

"I know that I don't need to, but I want to. I'm sure Seth hates you walking home alone at night."

"He does, but we can't afford to get the car fixed ight now. Disability doesn't pay much." She shrugs like it's just a fact of life. "And every cent I bring in goes to keeping the lights on."

"I'm going to come look at it tomorrow morning. I did auto shop all 4 years." She starts to interrupt me. "No, don't tell me not to. I'm fairly certain that this is what friends do, look out for each other. I am not a real friendly guy, so I could be wrong, but I don't think I am."

Her laughter doesn't carry much humor. "I guess I wouldn't really know anymore either. Most of my friends scattered when I got pregnant. The guys all blamed me for Seth dropping out of college, and the girls said I trapped him. They still say hurtful things. Chad came in tonight with that Nicole girl. They said it's my fault he had to take that construction job and got hurt." She has tears running down her face now. "They told me Seth would have been better off if I had aborted Sydney and never told him." The deep breath she pulls in does little to steady her voice. "What if they're right? What if I did wreck Seth's life? I mean, I never would have aborted Syd, but I could have not told him about her."

"Honestly, fuck them both. Fuck all of them." I wrap my arm around her shoulder and squeeze her. It's a bit uncomfortable to hold my friend like this, but I can tell that she needs the reassurance right now. "Seth loves you two girls so much. Every time I've seen him since he moved home, he's shown me pictures of you two. He is happy with the life you guys have. Does it suck that he got hurt? Sure, but you guys are a good family. I want to grow to be like you guys." I joke as I let go of her and give her shoulder a shove with my own.