Inside My Brain - BookCopy10

My trigger

I have a trigger song. And by this I mean: a song that causes great emotional pain. It's not for any particular deep or personal reason, it just makes me cry so hard upon hearing it.

This isn't very uncommon, actually a lot of people have songs that make them cry. But this isn't even because of the song. It's because of the music video.

Marshmello fans might see what I'm getting at here.

The song is Happier by Marshmello. The worst thing is, I used to love that song. It was my favourite song for a long long time and now I can't even listen to it. In case you don't know, the music video is about a girl who gets a dog for a childhood birthday. The dog grows up with her and is with her through every hard time in her life.

Then the dog dies.

I couldn't get past that bit.

My little sister told me that the video goes on to when she's older and has a daughter of her own, who gets a dog for her birthday too. But that part just makes me realise that someday that dog will die too. And every other dog in the world.

Including mine.

This is not something I like to think about and- fuck I'm crying while writing this. I love my dog so much and I can't bear the thought that someday he might not be here.

I realised I couldnt listen to the song anymore yesterday when I started listening to it. I got less than twenty seconds in before I began sobbing and had to switch it off.

So yeah that's a bit random but it's mainly a warning to my friends not to play that song around me because I will cry.