Bear

Chapter 33

Liam drove me home. The whole way we were quiet. He pulled up in the driveway, but didn't turn off the car.

"Are you sure you're ok with this?" He asked me.

I nodded. "Yeah, we can try it." I said with a one shouldered shrug.

"I'll walk you to the door." he said quietly.

We both got out, and walked onto the front porch. His hand slid down my arm to my hand, and he gently held it. He stepped into me, and wrapped one arm around my waist as he just looked at me. He brushed his nose against mine and I felt his breath against my face just before his lips touched mine.

They were cold from the night air, and I pulled back, not wanting it to go further.

"Thank you for dinner." I said as I stepped back.

"You're welcome. Happy birthday." He said. "I'll call you later, ok?"

I nodded as I stepped inside, and shut the door. I turned the lock, and set my clutch down on the table by the door. My feet were hurting, so I pulled off my heels and walked into the living room. Amy was asleep on the couch with Izzy on her chest, also asleep. I heard Mom set her cup down, and looked up at her.

"How was dinner?" She asked softly.

I ran my tongue over my bottom lip as I gave her a small smile, "It was good..." I nodded looking back at Izzy sleeping.

"Mia." Mom said, knowing exactly what happened without being told.

I knelt down and brushed the hair out of Izzy's face. Her long dark eyelashes were resting on her chubby little cheeks as she slept.

"I know, Mom. But if it makes her life better, and gives her what she needs, then I won't even think twice about it." I whispered.

I rubbed Amy's arm to gently wake her. Her eyes slowly opened, and she smiled. I carefully picked up Izzy, and carried her upstairs. She was in comfortable clothes, so I didn't bother to put her in pajamas. I laid her in bed, and pulled her blankets up to her chin. The bear that Damien sent to her was by her head. I reached out for it, and held in my lap. It was so soft, I ran my hand over it and watched as the fuzz of the bear moved under my hand.

"Mommy?"

"Yeah, baby?" I said.

"Is Bear ever gonna come home?" She asked.

I took a shaky breath as I tucked the bear under her arm.

I shook my head as I said, "No."

Cupping her little cheek, I rubbed my thumb over it. I leaned in and kissed her forehead.

"Goodnight, honey."

"Goodnight Mommy."

I walked downstairs, and said goodbye to Amy as she left. Mom went upstairs to bed, and I just stood in the middle of the house in the dark. I walked over to the table and pulled the card out of the flowers. I ran my finger over the letters again.

"Thank you, Damien." I whispered.

I put the card back, and walked into my room. I pulled off my dress, and put on a t-shirt and shorts. I put my hair up in a bun, and crawled into bed.

...

Damien's POV

Several weeks had passed. I didn't feel any different. I still couldn't sleep at night, so rather than drinking myself to death, I went back to being a DJ. When I was first out of high school I used to do it to make money here and there. But now, I was actually making decent money on it. I charged a flat rate for the night from the company or person, and then I also got the tips that were left for me.

It wasn't anywhere near as much as I made at Sandstone, but it was enough to cover my bills, and give Isaac a cut for letting me stay with him. I was hired by all kinds of people and companies. Whether it was a club, or a birthday party. I learned quickly that I wasn't going to do a bachelorette party again. It was like pulling leeches off of me trying to leave at the end of the night. Although I did get a $1,000 tip that night. Too bad I felt like a whore taking it.

I mostly stuck to clubs and events that had decent security. That's what I was doing tonight. I was at a smaller club that the college kids tend to go to. I was actually booked here once a week. I guess they liked the way I did things. 

I was always so tired by the time I got home I was able to get a few hours of sleep before the dreams of Mia started. I charged $60 an hour, and I just did a five hour night. That put $300 in my pocket, plus the $215 in tips. Not a bad night at all.

I called a cab and took a deep breath as I relaxed in the back seat and closed my eyes. I sent Mia flowers today. I never heard from her, but Lynn sent me a text that she got them. I had only heard from her one other time, when I sent Izzy the bear. She said she loved it and sleeps with it every night. That hurt, and made me feel good at the same time. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and just looked at the picture of us in bed that was now set as my background. I looked at it enough, that I figured why not. I wished I could see more of her face. I of course had other pictures of her that I could look at, but this one was different. It was such an intimate moment between us.

I had uninstalled all of my social media accounts. I didn't want to have people trying to reach out to me, and I didn't want to see her updates on Instagram. I didn't want to watch her move on. To start living without me. I just held onto the memories I had of us. The three of us.

The cab pulled up outside the house and I handed the driver $30 as I got out. I quietly walked inside knowing Isaac was probably asleep. He had some classic cars at the shop right now that were taking a lot of time and focus. He was tired when he came home at night, and he slept hard. As soon as I walked through the door of my room, I dropped my pants and fell into bed.